01.
Many couples, when they first got married, love was like honey, you are in me, and you are in me. But with the passage of time, especially after having children, the relationship between husband and wife seems to gradually deteriorate. They started arguing about a little thing, and they had to fight each other.
Later, the couple stopped quarreling and both fell silent. Outsiders thought that this was a good thing. In fact, under the calm appearance, the waves were surging and the dark tide was surging.
After a while, they divorced silently. Outsiders can’t figure it out, isn’t it very harmonious, no quarrels, no fights, how can you just leave?
Others don't know that freezing three feet is not a day's cold, and a relationship must experience an unknown cold from the breakdown to the end.
Zhang Min and Li Liang are in free love. When they first met, Li Liang was very enthusiastic. He gave her gifts every other time and asked for warmth, and offered various considerate services.
Gradually, Zhang Min was moved by Li Liang and agreed to his courtship, and the two officially became lovers. During the relationship, Li Liang was also considered a good boyfriend, and he was also considerate of Zhang Min. Zhang Min was a little uncomfortable, and Li Liang was very nervous. He told her to drink plenty of water and take medicine on time, so she went to the hospital if she couldn't afford it.
Seeing that Zhang Min was not taken care of, Li Liang simply suggested that if two people live together, they should take care of each other.
Zhang Min thought for a while, this love rushed to get married, it doesn't hurt to live together, so he agreed. During the time
lived together, there were big and small conflicts, but in general, it was still sweeter than painful. Within half a year of being together, Zhang Min became pregnant.
Faced with the sudden change, Zhang Min had to ask Li Liang to get married. The two had just left to work for a few years, and had little savings. They could not buy a house. When they got married, they could only live with their parents, or they would continue to rent.
02.
As the months got older, Zhang Min's pregnancy became more and more serious. The company was very far away from home. Zhang Min followed Li Liang's advice and quit his job to raise a baby at home. Seeing that she was about to give birth, she had to ask someone to take care of her confinement and she returned to her in-laws' house.
is also here, and Zhang Min's marriage is no longer happy.
Whether a man is worth relying on depends on his independence. Once a man returns home, in front of his parents, he will be fully exposed and all his shortcomings will be exposed.
Zhang Min and his mother-in-law had a parenting conflict during the confinement period, and the two quarreled. Zhang Min hopes that Li Liang can stand on her side, speak for her, and let her mother-in-law change her mind.
Unexpectedly, Li Liang not only did not listen, but stood on the side of her mother-in-law and told Zhang Min to learn to be patient. She was also a woman and had experienced childbirth. She ate more salt than you could eat. There is nothing wrong with experience. After
said this, Zhang Min's heart was cold. She had just escaped from the gate of the ghost, from a normal delivery to a cesarean section. Now the wound is still painful. She originally expected her husband to support herself in spirit and action, but she did not expect that the man would still be on the side of his mother.
From that moment, Zhang Min felt like an outsider.
How many husbands and wives' relationship deteriorates, it all starts from the cold heart, even the sweet marriage, the quality will gradually decrease.
When a woman is most vulnerable, needs help the most, and needs relief the most, as her closest husband, not only did not help her and understand her, but instead poured cold water on her, no matter how good the relationship was, it would be stiff.
Zhang Min was stimulated and suppressed by her mother-in-law on the one hand, and on the other hand was "taught" by Li Liang, always allowing her to accommodate.
Zhang Min couldn't bear it, and broke out. She vented her resentment towards her mother-in-law to her husband, and angered Li Liang.
Li Liang doesn't know why. He feels that his wife has become so unreasonable and not gentle since she gave birth to a child. It is tiring enough to go to work and earn money to support her family. Why is she not so considerate.
So the husband and wife quarreled.
03.
all said, the person you marry is a ghost or a ghost, and you know if you have a baby. A woman can only see the relationship between herself and her in-laws when she is the weakest.
When there was a quarrel between the husband and wife, the in-laws stood on Li Liang’s side, regardless of whether Zhang Min was still in confinement. In short, the whole family refuted Zhang Min, accusing her of being hypocritical and unreasonable. I have seen people like her who lose their temper at every turn.
Zhang Min feels very wronged. In this family, he is like an outsider, lonely and helpless, even his husband is separated from him.
Zhang Xiaoxian said: "A man's harm to a woman is not necessarily that he falls in love with others, but that he let her down when she is expecting something."
Since the confinement, Zhang Min's heart seems to have something The grievances were not vented, and accumulated in my heart for a long time, it was very uncomfortable, aggrieved, and painful.
A trivial matter in life will become the fuse of her quarrel with Li Liang. Every time she quarreled, Zhang Min would say: I knew you were nothing but this to me, I shouldn’t have married you at the time. I was so blind. Will live with you, if it were not for pregnancy, I would not be with you. I really hate that I couldn't understand your person earlier. You are simply a dutiful and filial mom, who only sees his parents and no wife.
Whenever Zhang Min cried like this, he seemed to poke Li Liang's heart. He was unwilling to be labeled as filial piety and Ma Bao, and the two quarreled even more. As soon as the quarrel broke out, her in-laws followed and accused her, saying that she would not be someone’s daughter-in-law, and told her that she would divorce if she was really unhappy. The old Li’s family did not worry about finding a daughter-in-law, nor was she rare that she could not earn money and had a temper. Big daughter-in-law. These words of
once again stimulated Zhang Min, and she asked Li Liang blankly: Do you think so too?
Li Liang still stood on the side of his parents and said: You really shouldn't lose your temper. How can young people stand up to their elders?
04.
Zhang Min got her answer. Since then, she has stopped making noises or making noises, just like a changed person, quietly, without talking, eating when you have food, and sleeping when you sleep. In a few months, she will go out to work again, and she will not ask anything about the family except for the children.
Li Liang thought she finally figured it out, she would not lose her temper anymore, and from then on, her family and foreign affairs would be happy, and she would be able to live a good life. Unexpectedly, a few months later, Zhang Min put a divorce agreement on the table, demanding custody of the children, and would not take away their family.
Li Liang was frightened and silly, thinking Zhang Min was joking and had something to say, he must make trouble to this point. Zhang Min said: "No kidding, we have already reached the point where we have nothing to say. You still don't understand my emotions, my sufferings, and my grievances, and I no longer expect warmth and relief from you."
There is no sudden divorce, only the accumulated grievances. The deterioration of the relationship between husband and wife is not overnight, but the result of a long-term backlog. One party is always eager, the other party always does not give, and the hearts cannot be connected together, how can they "warm up" each other.
looked around and saw that as long as the marriage is happily and high-quality marriages, they know how to "warm the heart" and give what the other party needs. If you need comfort, your partner will give her comfort instead of accusing her; if you need support, you will give her support instead of contradicting the tone; if you need to talk, you will listen to her instead of disgusting her.
has always had no knack to maintain a marriage, but she has her in her heart to provide you with warmth and love at all times.
-end-
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