Author丨Xiaozhi
I heard a friend say something very heartbreaking.
Her mother's uncle, with a total of 5 children and 3 live in villas, but when she was 84 years old, she left drinking pesticides.
Simple line of words, but the sadness of coming late is all in it.
Seeing this, do you think that her mother’s uncle’s children must not be filial to the elderly. They live such a good life, but their father does not have a happy old age. This is not the case with
.
On the contrary, her mother's uncle's children are actually very filial and treat the elderly very well.
Just, do you find that the child’s own success does not conflict with the desolation of his parents when he is old.
I saw an elderly blind date program two days ago. An aunt's daughter is very outstanding. After studying in France, she married away from France and has not come back for three years. The aunt worked hard to raise her eldest daughter alone, but she still lived alone in her later years.
Her daughter also took her over to live, but her language was not clear. She was not used to it and insisted on coming back after a while.
Her daughter was worried and took the initiative to sign up for her mother for an elderly blind date program, hoping that her mother could find a partner to be with her.
When children grow up, they will have their own life and ideals to pursue, and they will also have various responsibilities they have to shoulder. Parents are one of the responsibilities, but they can often not be the whole responsibilities.
So no matter how high the child flies, no matter how far the child flies, it still does not affect the parents in sight, and walks alone towards the destination of life.
Back to the topic at the beginning, her mother's uncle was the kind of father who was afraid of causing trouble for the child. He refused to go to any child's home. He was deeply attached to his hometown and said that his legs and feet could still move, so he had to live alone in his hometown. He planted vegetables, planted many fruit trees, and raised various poultry. Every Chinese New Year, the children could take away a lot of things when they came home.
Usually his children will try their best to drive back to visit, but the old man never wants to give money, saying that he can't spend much money in the countryside, and the vegetables he grows can be sold at the market, and his living expenses are enough.
The children don’t wear much clothes for him. They say it’s too expensive and are worried that they will wear them. They still have old clothes to wear, let alone all kinds of food. They often find that the things have expired next time, but the old man still doesn’t eat them.
No matter who says it, it is useless. Everyone has no choice but to sigh at the old father's stubbornness.
includes the final departure. The old man is also his own idea. He has an incurable disease and can live for a while if he spends money, and the children are ready to treat it.
But the old man lost his treatment and said he would not waste the money and insisted on going back from the hospital. The day he left later, he chose it himself.
His children all understand what the reason for the elderly do this. He is still worried about causing trouble for the children and worry about spending the money. Then the people will leave, which is not cost-effective.
The old man himself said, "At 84 years old, it's almost done, and he's alive enough."
All the children were crying.
There is an irrefutable reality: When you get old, no matter what your conditions are or how many children are, it is a journey of gradually loneliness and desolation.
No one can accompany you through this road. Those imagined happiness and redemption in old age may become more cruel in the face of real life.
For more young people, the reason why they fear aging and death is actually more of a fear of unknown destiny. This uncontrollable feeling will make them feel anxious at any stage in their life.
Before, a young man discussed with me that she was in her early 20s this year and said that in her imagination, it is not scary to be old and life alone is also beautiful, because she is very home now and often stays alone. She enjoys this kind of time alone.
In her opinion, this is basically the case when she is old.
I corrected her point of view at that time: The loneliness that was voluntarily chosen when young and the loneliness that was passively chosen when old are completely different.
When I was young, the reason why a person still felt interesting was that, as long as he wanted to go out and contact this society, he could go out at any time. He was still lying in bed in the last second, and immediately put on clothes in the next second, and went wherever he wanted. This kind of sense of freedom would greatly reduce the loss in his heart; second, even if young people don’t go out, they can still see the world through their mobile phones. The information they received was varied, and the level of excitement was no less than that they would go to the scene to see it in person.
But for the elderly, when the body gradually decreases with the growth of years, they are bound to be bound in both actions and thoughts, and even passively bound, and they have no choice.
When you are old, you have to accept your old age. Even if your heart is not convinced, your body must also accept your old age. When you are old, you cannot compare to your physical condition when you are young. When you fall, you will stand up by patting the soil on your body. But when you are old, even if you fall gently, you may never stand up again.
Therefore, in the old age, no one can be willful. It is impossible to go wherever he wants. He will pay special attention to it.
Here is the first step of passive limitation, which comes from action.
Furthermore, the learning ability will decline rapidly after aging. You cannot use the active thinking of young people and the speed of accepting new things to compare their status after aging.
Many young people don’t realize this and think they learn things quickly when they are young, but they still do this when they are old.
The decline in learning ability is also uncontrollable by yourself. This is an inevitable phenomenon of life aging.
Therefore, when you get old, no matter how good your financial ability or filial the child is, it is still impossible to avoid these reality.
When you reach the old age stage of life, no matter which direction you go in your life, it may be a tribulation. A person’s journey in this life cannot be smooth sailing, especially when he gets old. Anyone can only take every step ahead as much as possible on the basis of being content with the circumstances and live up to every day of life.
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