Lemon Emotional Class丨Author
Pexels, Pixabay, Internet丨Image source, Infringement
A lady came to me for emotional consultation, she said this:
"Lemon, I found that my husband cheated on me and planned to divorce him, but my mind is very messy now, and I don't know how to negotiate with him. What should I do to avoid losing money?"
Based on my years of experience in emotional consultation, there are three main things that need to be done in the divorce negotiation of a partner cheating:
1. Make sure whether you really want to divorce or pretend to divorce
Before you negotiate with your partner, you must first figure out whether you really want to divorce the other party or fake divorce; fake divorce means: you regard divorce as a means, and you want to use this method to punish and threaten your partner.
For example, if you use divorce to scare him and punish him to vent your dissatisfaction with his cheating; or if you use divorce to threaten him and force him to break up with a third party; or if you just want to revenge him, you want to see his anxious embarrassment to eliminate the harm caused to you by his cheating, etc.
or above are all fake divorces. They do not really want to divorce the other party, but rather want to continue living through this method in the name of divorce.
But you have to know that your "apply for divorce" method cannot achieve the goal of living a good life, but will instead make you more passive in this relationship; because most men have straight thinking, and what they see is the superficial result of your desire to divorce, but they cannot see your true inner demands.
So, before negotiating divorce with a man, you must make sure whether you really have made up your mind to divorce him, or want to use the divorce to punish him and threaten him.
You have to understand that divorce is not a means, but an option. Before you are not sure about choosing this item, don’t take it to the public, otherwise the situation will only get worse.
2. Let the third party help
If you are sure to divorce your partner, then you'd better synchronize this information to the third party that your husband cheats on and let her help you.
You don’t need to feel uncomfortable. You have to know that not only do you want to divorce, but the third party also wants you to divorce. Your goal is the same as her, so you might as well join forces with the third party to let her help you stabilize and guide your husband. With her assistance, your goal of divorce is easier to achieve.
With the help of a third party, your husband will feel that someone outside will provide you with a guarantee, which will make it easier for him to agree to the divorce, and will also be more willing to give you more compensation.
3. Use your partner’s swaying and guilty mentality
When you talk about divorce with your partner, he usually sways because he feels that you are in charge at home at this moment, and a third party outside gives him emotional comfort, his emotional satisfaction and family stability; and once he agrees to divorce, it means that he will face a situation of family breakdown, and he will worry that his future will be bad, so he will become very entangled and do not know whether he should divorce.
At this time, you can take the opportunity to prepare two things: one is the details of the property to clarify the joint property of the couple; the other is the divorce agreement , in case of emergencies.
After these two things are ready, you can observe your partner's status. When he is not so repulsive to divorce and has a good attitude towards you, you can talk about divorce with your partner.
Generally speaking, a man will not agree to a divorce immediately. At this time, you can use his swaying and guilty mentality to play emotional cards with him, such as talking about the beauty of the past, talking about children, talking about freedom and the future, etc., to let him gradually relax and guide him to compensate you.
Of course, if he has always disagreed with the divorce, then you can also sue the divorce and force him to make a decision to achieve the goal of the divorce.
In short, divorce negotiations have three main points: one is to clarify your goals and not waver; two is to strive for effective resources and establish alliances; three is to grasp the psychology of your partner and adopt corresponding methods; if you master these three negotiation skills, you will be in an unbeaten position in this game.
May you cherish the people you love around you, learn to love, give love, and gain love.
If you have any emotional/psychological problems, you can come to find lemon, I will give you advice~
Tips: Click on my avatar, find the sixin key private me, and you will find me, come and find me!
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