Dear husband:
Sorry, please allow me to call you like this for the last time, because we once loved each other so deeply, let me leave a last little memory!
You are right, Lao Wang and I left next door and went to a place where I always wanted to go, but I never had the chance to go. Although I don’t want your forgiveness to elope with Lao Wang, I don’t want you to keep it in the dark because I’m extremely disappointed with you.
Do you know that I live a very annoying life!
When we were in love, life was so romantic and passionate. The surprises you gave me were endless. We both wished we were together every day.
But after getting married, everything changed. The unit and home, the boring work and life of two points and one line became the norm; not only did you no longer surprise me, but you sometimes even directly ignored my existence, and family conflicts of quarrels every two days, one small, three days, one big, one big, became the norm.
You have chosen to forget all important festivals such as wedding anniversary, my birthday, etc.; my health and my emotions have become pretentious in your mouth; even my parents, relatives and friends have to act according to your expression; it is as if the whole world owes you, but the one who hurts the most every time is always the one who hurts the most.
I feel that home is no longer a warm harbor, you are no longer a warm support, I don’t want to go home, I don’t want to face you, every day after work, I just want to escape from everything.
Do you know that I live so tired!
In the unit, I work hard every day, and even put in more hardships and hard work than those men, but all I get is to keep my job and get a job and a promotion and salary increase is nowhere to be achieved. But do you know that I am working so hard, just to reduce your burden and improve our family's economic situation.
At home, in order to make you feel more comfortable, I have developed martial arts skills, going to the hall and going to the kitchen, but unexpectedly, I have served you as an old man. Think about it, when you come back, you complain about how hard the work is. You never took the initiative to help me with any housework, or even if the oil bottle is poured, you don’t care.
For you and for your home, I get up earlier than chickens, eat worse than pigs, and do more than cows, but what I get is a quarrel for two days, a small quarrel for three days and a big quarrel for three days. I'm tired, really tired. I don't want to go home, don't want to face you, just want to escape.
Day after day, year after year, my work by following the rules makes my mood like a stagnant pool; my boring family life makes my heart numb; you who lacks interest makes my heart unable to feel a little turbulent. Later, Lao Wang next door appeared. He was exactly the same as you when he was in love. My silent care made me fall unconsciously.
You can accuse me of being ashamed of being shameless or accuse me of being empathetic with other people. I admit all of these, but please ask yourself, is this situation really just a problem between Lao Wang and me?
When you think about it clearly one day, you will come to the place I yelled at you all day long, the place I always wanted to go but didn’t go; if you can’t remember where to go to find me, then let everything disappear with your memory.
Former lover
December 1, 2022