Author丨Xiaozhi
A girl said she broke up with her boyfriend. She has been reluctant to accept the reason for breaking up with
. To put it bluntly, when her boyfriend has a better life, he is no longer willing to walk side by side with her.
Her mind at this time was: I was with him at the age of 20. He had nothing at the beginning, and I didn’t dislike him and chose to be with him. Now that he has everything, he chose to give up on me. I was unwilling to give up and didn't want to let him go like that.
Now, they are all 27 years old. Originally, she thought that 7 years of staying together would be enough to make each other eternal in her life, and she also thought that accompanying her boyfriend from the trough could become his firm choice.
She thought about the days after the two of them, but she never thought about being separated.
She thought he would marry her, and they were also at the age of talking about marriage, but unexpectedly, what they got was the result of breaking up.
, she will definitely not be able to let go.
People in the world often say that true love is to never leave you regardless of birth, old age, sickness and death, wealth and poverty. I used to think that such love could be seen everywhere, but when I grew up, I realized that the reason why people always praise those loves that depend on life and death was just because of their rareness.
Yes, being able to love someone beyond the instinct of human nature is a rare existence. What is human nature? The result may be heartbreaking. The nature of people is to seek benefits and avoid harm. People go to high places and water flows to low places, which is to maximize personal interests.
In this world, more people’s love is not that great. Choosing to be together or choosing to be separated has its pros and cons.
From her position, she must think that her boyfriend is cruel and completely disregards his past and friendship. She cannot let go of this love, or is unwilling to give up, or even hates her boyfriend, which is normal. After all, this is the seven years she has paid for. No one can let it go easily. It may take a long time for her to truly get out of it and look at everything in the past with a calm mind.
However, they are not married yet, and the boys are not allowed to separate.
Of course, I am not saying that I agree with this behavior, but I want you to understand that you cannot use any bargaining chips to bet on someone’s deep affection for you.
You can never really understand others, even if you have ever fallen in love.
So what? People often change. If you stay at a certain stage, then when this change occurs, you will definitely be the only one who is hurt.
Can a boy be able to survive a long period of love? cannot. is not just her, but in my life, I have met more girls. When facing the loss of a relationship, they always use time to increase their bargaining chips. They think that for many years we have been together, why did he change as soon as he said it?
In fact, it is not that the other party changes as soon as they say it. The most likely situation is that the other party has already started to change, but you just believe it too much, so you have never noticed it.
Those loves that are always three to five years, seven to eight years, or even longer may sound scary, but in fact they are like a piece of paper, broken with one click.
Can a girl accompany a boy to grow up?
is not impossible.
Last time there was a sister who asked me this question. She said she was afraid that after she accompanied her boyfriend to grow up, she would be the ones who would enjoy the cool air in the end. She was hesitating and worried.
I told her that you don’t have to worry. If you love him now, then just be with him with peace of mind and go step by step.
Many people have overlooked a key point: In fact, as a girl, it is not that you cannot accompany the boy to grow up. The most important thing is that in this process, have you grown up by yourself?
You cannot put all your hopes and goals on the person in front of you, thinking that you will wait for him to work hard and struggle, and one day you will be able to give the life you want. If you think so, you will undoubtedly hand over your destiny to others, and then you will be really passive.
Therefore, you must grow yourself, keep improving, and strive to pursue your dreams. The best love will always be evenly matched, and it is good for you and I am not bad.
In an intimate relationship, no matter what identity you are, if you want to be a man, there are always only four effective ways: improve yourself.
This is realistic, but it is very useful.
Only when your own value is great enough, the more initiative you have in this relationship, and the greater your choice will be.
Therefore, this kind of eating constipation does not simply refer to eating constipation in terms of emotions. If you can only rely on emotions to restrain a person, it is not so safe, because emotions themselves are actually an emotion that is easy to change. A person loves you today, but may not necessarily love you tomorrow. Love will not be news out of thin air, but love will indeed transfer. Therefore, in order to stabilize a love, in addition to the corresponding emotions, it also needs to balance certain interests and strength.
Only when you are worth enough and the interests of two people are more involved, the more stable your relationship with one person will be.
Seeing this, some people who love love first will definitely not believe it. They think that the person in front of them loves themselves so much and will continue to love them in the future. This is not the case. In any relationship, you can only restrain yourself, and you cannot ask the other party.
This is the core factor in stabilizing intimate relationships.
From another perspective, when you are no longer afraid of leaving you alone, it is actually another kind of destiny. At this time, you will definitely not be the one you are being controlled. You understand that even if you leave this person, you will still have a good choice in the future. You can see your ability, and you treat the person in front of you well, but it is not necessary - when you are not eaten, it is actually a manifestation of eating the other person.
So, instead of please the other person, it is really better to please yourself and improve yourself. The principle of
is always very useful.
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