text丨Tao Xiaojing
The spring breeze is not as good as you, Xiaojing is here, waiting for you!
I remember that in " What things about couples " said:
"Love is like this. It's not enough to just move love. You have to accept the test and stand the test before you know whether it is solid."
Marriage is the biggest test of love. Whether a marriage can develop for a long time is the love between husband and wife.
However, the continuation of marriage requires not only love, but also the willpower to not abandon or give up.
Everyone wants a perfect marriage of "holding your hand and growing old together", but if someone lets go of his hands halfway, how can it be perfect?
So, if two people want to grow old, they must first hold each other's hands tightly. No matter how big the obstacles you encounter in the future, you cannot easily let go.
Not letting go is the prerequisite for walking hand in hand. Only by staying with each other can a couple successfully reach the other side of happiness.
On the road to the other side of happiness, couples will encounter three obstacles. As long as two people can grit their teeth and survive, happiness will come uninvited.
The first hurdle: the dull period of emotional development
Two people who can enter the palace of marriage must have fallen in love. At this time, love is at its peak, and then it slowly goes downhill.
Plus the difference between marriage and love is too big. In the process of facing the food, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea for a long time, the relationship between the two gradually reached a dull period.
This dull period may come very quickly or later, but it will come sooner or later. Whenever it comes, it is a hurdle that couples have to face.
If two people fail this hurdle, their feelings will completely dissipate. Once the relationship is broken, the continuation of marriage will not be so easy.
If you want the marriage to last for a long time, couples must work together to overcome this hurdle. Only by reignite the flame of love as much as possible can marriage become better.
This is a hurdle that couples will inevitably face in their years of life. Only by gritting their teeth and enduring it will happiness come.
Remember that there is no hurdle that cannot be overcome. Even if there is little love left between each other, there is still family affection and responsibility, and both parties must not let go.
The second hurdle: the conflict period of raising children
The most likely thing to lead to conflict between husband and wife is actually the problem of raising children.
The arrival of the child will add a lot of joy to the family, but it also brings many conflicts accordingly, including not only the conflict between husband and wife, but also the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
The two generations of people raise their children completely different ways. Once they live under the same roof, conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will inevitably arise. The conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will directly trigger conflicts between husband and wife and affect the development of marriage.
These contradictions will not decrease as the child grows up, but will become more and more. If this continues, the relationship between husband and wife will be more likely to have problems.
Many families have such problems, and this is also the second hurdle that couples have to face. Only by overcoming this hurdle can the family survive happily.
To overcome this hurdle safely, the couple needs to work together. No matter what problems you encounter, you should have quota and quantity.
After all, everyone is thinking about their children. As long as they think in the same direction and work in the same direction, they will definitely be able to survive.
After overcoming this hurdle, the relationship between husband and wife will be better, and the marriage will be happier and more fulfilling.
The third hurdle: facing the difficult period of temptation
Marriage is a city, the city is the trivialities of firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea, and outside the city is the temptation of bright lights and wine.
Faced with trivial matters for a long time, many people will feel bored. Once the outside world is tempted, the heart will be shaken.
The biggest crisis in marriage comes from this. We call a period a difficult period in the face of temptation, and betrayal and divorce often occur in this period.
A marriage may be completely broken if one of the couples does not resist the temptation from the outside world.
This is the biggest threat to marriage. If you want the marriage to develop for a long time, couples must work together to overcome this hurdle.
No one can shake the temptation from the outside world. Even if the relationship between husband and wife is not that good, they must stick to the bottom line.
As long as the bottom line is there, the error will not be made. There is no mistake in betrayal in marriage, even if you have successfully survived this period.
The couple can even survive this hurdle, so it will be difficult to be broken up. In this way, happiness will naturally surround you.
Xiaojing's emotional summary:
Couple can be said to be the two people who have been with each other for the longest time in their lives. On the road to walking hand in hand for a long time, there are many difficulties to solve and many obstacles to overcome.
The three hurdles mentioned in the article are the most affected by marriage development. Any of these three hurdles may bring devastating harm to marriage.
If you want your marriage to continue happily, the couple must face it together and grit their teeth to overcome these three hurdles.
Although the process is very difficult, you must believe that once you get through it, happiness will come.
A good marriage cannot be separated from the joint management and hard work of the couple. As long as the two of them work together, there is no hurdle that they cannot overcome.
When you are old, you will find that these experiences are actually the greatest gains in life.
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