If love has a next life, I hope that my ex-husband can be born in a loving family. For thousands of years, the idea of favoring boys over girls has been deeply rooted in the hearts of many men. The ex-husband is the youngest son in the family. While carrying all hope, he cannot escape the shackles of his original family.
I gave birth to a daughter, and my ex-father-in-law forced us to divorce. After our divorce, our ex-husband gave up the opportunity to work outside and returned to his hometown to run the B&B .
The unsatisfactory career development, and after remarrying and divorce, the trivialities in the family became the last straw that overwhelmed the ex-husband. On the way back to his hometown, he had a serious car accident and never woke up again.
——Yang Ying
Narrator: Yang Ying, 30 years old this year.
[Ex-husband was once a sunny boy]
The story of my ex-husband (Zhao Qi, pseudonym) and I met in a beautiful countryside.
Time goes back to the summer after the college entrance examination. That year my parents took me on a trip to celebrate my admission to a key university in a coastal city in the southern region.
My father is a doctor and my mother is a teacher. My family will wait until I get time to go out and have fun after the college entrance examination. We went to the beautiful mountain village and enjoyed the summer time. There has long been a popular attractions for homestays, with a lot of tourists.
In that village built along the river, I met Zhao Qi. It turned out that his father opened several B&Bs, and he took promotional videos and photos of his B&Bs during his summer vacation. Zhao Qi, carrying the camera, was filled with the breath of youth.
Zhao Qi not only works part-time homestay publicity tasks, but also needs to prepare drinks. On a summer afternoon, the iced lemonade is still very sweet. Later I learned that lemonade was specially prepared for me.
Zhao Qi is 2 years older than me. Young people always attract each other, and we quickly added each other's contact information.
QQ was popular at that time, and we often chatted until late at night.
The love of youth is as refreshing as a lemon. Even though we were having a big fuss between us later, my initial memories of him will always stay in summer.
[Love is beautiful]
A trip changed a lot of my life and Zhao Qi. I never forget him, and he cares about me.
When I went to university to report, Zhao Qi checked the guide in advance, saving us a lot of trouble.
The second year we met, he confessed to me. In the past, the photo-taking function of mobile phones was not as powerful as it is now, but we still took a lot of group photos and a lot of funny photos. The old mobile phone I used to have is still there, but the person is no longer there. What is the change of things and people? It probably means that the person you miss will never come back.
When Zhao Qi and I were in love, both families disagreed. But the love of young people is never controlled by their families.
After graduating from university, Zhao Qixian returned to the provincial capital to find a job. He saved money himself and prepared a warm little nest for me. Even if the house was rented, it was still decorated very beautifully by him.
[Both families are not optimistic about our marriage]
If I don’t know Zhao Qi, my life will follow my parents’ plan. I will work hard to get a postgraduate entrance examination and study for a PhD step by step.
But I can't bear to leave Zhao Qi alone in the provincial capital. I did not take the postgraduate entrance examination, nor did I rely on the postgraduate program, but ran to Zhao Qi after graduation.
's desperate love annoyed my parents for a while. My father often lamented that young people don’t care about the consequences when doing things.
Zhao Qi tried his best to please my parents and carefully prepared the marriage proposal ceremony. He studied computer science and his salary was not low. I graduated from college and had a pitiful salary. In order to give me a sense of security, Zhao Qi wanted to get a marriage certificate with me.
But neither family is optimistic about our marriage.
Zhao Qi's family is his father in charge and his personality is particularly strong. All the things about his family were asked to nod, and my parents had already observed this. There are two homestays in the Zhao family, and Dad Zhao is responsible for all matters, and Mother Zhao stands timidly. If Dad Zhao is the dazzling sun, Mother Zhao is just dewdrops that cannot withstand the sun or tossing.
My family doesn’t want Zhao Qi to be my other half of life, after all, what we have to face in the future is his entire family.Just the strong character of Dad Zhao is enough for me to drink.
Zhao Qi's family doesn't like me, a delicate girl. Zhao's father hopes that Zhao Qi can marry a girl with a weak personality and obeys her husband's words. Zhao Qi also has a sister who went out to work after graduating from technical secondary school. Compared to Zhao Qi's happiness, my sister's life is very hard.
The scenery in Zhao Qi’s hometown is particularly good, but the idea of favoring boys over girls is still deeply rooted. In such a family that prefers boys over girls, the lives of my son and daughter are very different, so how could my parents agree to the marriage?
Our love has not been favored from the beginning. But we still stick to the vow of being together for the rest of our lives and stubbornly entered the marriage hall.
[After I got pregnant, Zhao Daddy stubbornly prepared the name of his grandson]
Zhao Qi's family conditions are not bad, and the houses in the provincial capital are completely affordable. The reason why Zhao Qi rented a house by himself at the beginning was that he didn't want to be disturbed by his father.
When we got married, we each bought a wedding house. The house bought by the Zhao family is written in the name of Dad Zhao, and the house bought by my family is written in the name of my parents.
We often laugh at ourselves. Although we have a wedding house, we don’t have the freedom to rent a house.
We still live in the rented house, so that both parents can reduce interference with us as much as possible.
But I still underestimated Zhao's influence. He urged us to have children every few days and emphasized that we must have a boy.
At that time, I was in a period of hard work in my career and didn’t want to have children early. In order to satisfy his father's wish to hold his grandson, Zhao Qi tried to force me to have a child.
I got pregnant shortly after entering the workplace. I was quickly excluded by the company, and later I simply quit my job and took care of my baby at home. But I didn't expect that my child would be despised before he was born.
Dad Zhao has prepared several names, none of which are girls. He also said that if the one who gave birth to a daughter, then continue to give birth until the son is born.
It was not until that moment that I felt my parents’ concerns. The only thing Zhao Qi cares about is the boy, and I found a fire pit for myself.
[The daughter was born, and he ran back to his hometown]
As the saying goes, the more you want to have a son, the less you can't give birth to a son.
The grandson of the Zhao family who had been waiting for for a long time did not come to him. I gave birth to a daughter, and Dad Zhao changed his face on the spot in the hospital.
If my parents weren't there, Dad Zhao would probably start smashing things. It’s okay for Zhao Qi to comfort my daughter with his mouth, but everyone can see the loss on his face. This is the man I want to marry regardless of everything, and I am also a defender of the idea of favoring boys over girls.
Originally, Zhao Qi prepared a lot of things and also invited paternity leave . But before I was discharged from the hospital, he was called away by Dad Zhao. Zhao Qi left for more than a week, without considering what we should do.
Natural birth recovered quickly. After I was taken home by my parents, my relatives at home were in a bad mood. At first, everyone was not optimistic about our marriage, but now the naked dislike of the Zhao family is already on the surface. It is not certain whether our small families can be kept.
I was in confinement by my parents and my tears never stopped. My mother could only keep comforting me and let me take care of my body. Zhao Qi and his father ran back to their hometown and contributed a great contribution to the breakdown of our marriage.
[Dad Zhao forced us to divorce]
Zhao Qi returned from his hometown 10 days after his daughter was born. His attitude changed rapidly, which I was unexpected. He also told me that the Zhao family would not prepare a full moon banquet in their hometown because the girl was not qualified to hold an full moon banquet . He also said that if he gave birth to a daughter, he would not even invite his relatives to red eggs .
"You can never wake up a person who pretends to be asleep." Facing Zhao Qi, who prefers boys over girls, I have nothing to say. Even though he is a man in the new era, even if he receives higher education, his concepts in his bones still cannot be changed.
It was at that time that I had the idea of divorce.
But what I didn't expect was that Dad Zhao was even more heartless than I thought. He said, I am not suitable for having a son, nor is it suitable for Zhao Qi.
Dad Zhao always felt that I had "caught away" Zhao Qi.If it weren't for me, Zhao Qi wouldn't have gone to the provincial capital to find a job, nor would he give up his homestay. But I will not become the second timid mother Zhao, nor will I let my daughter be wronged.
Dad Zhao gave me an ultimatum, either to promise to have a boy or to get a divorce. Facing the aggressive father Zhao, Zhao Qi chose to remain silent.
[After the divorce, he resigned and went home]
Divorce is not an easy thing. Zhao Qi tried to persuade me to send my daughter back to my hometown and leave it to Zhao's mother to take. Once my health recovers, he will have to have a second child with me and must give birth to a son.
My mother Zhao has not lived a good life herself and has no dignity at home. What's more, Zhao Qi's sister lived a very hard life. He had no place for a girl in his family, and no care.
I will not let my daughter grow up in a family that prefers boys over girls, nor will she become a wandering and helpless child.
Since Zhao Qi returned to his hometown, he has been yelling that I am not a good wife. He said that other relatives have given birth to sons, but I have given birth to daughters. He also said that if he gave birth to a daughter, he would be ridiculed by the villagers for the rest of his life and would not be able to raise his head in the village.
I was crying and signed the divorce agreement with Zhao Qi. Such a man will only bring countless grievances to our mother and daughter in the future.
Our marriage did not last for a few years, and what was left was heartbreaking.
Zhao Qi obeyed his father's words and resigned and returned to his hometown. The homestay in their hometown is the foundation of their survival. There is no need to work in the provincial capital, but to live a life based on people's faces.
[He remarried and divorced again]
It only took a few years to get married and divorced, but I can never go back to the past. I became a single mother and the object of discussion among relatives and friends.
Auntie uses my example to educate her children. Don’t look for families like Zhao Qi when talking about marriage. Everyone agrees with this.
After the divorce, I didn't dare to go out for a while. If my parents hadn't forced me to go out and find a job, I would have been hiding at home for the rest of my life. After all, my parents paid for my failed marriage. My parents asked my aunt to help take care of the children and comforted me that my life could start over.
The child support for my daughter, Zhao Qi called my bank card on time every month. But he had never seen the child and occasionally sent me WeChat messages, which was just a simple greeting.
He is even colder than I thought. Less than half a year after our divorce, the newlywed wife moved into his house in his hometown.
I just don’t know why, Zhao Qi divorced again less than a year after remarriage.
Good things don’t go out, bad things go through thousands of miles. The news of Zhao Qi's failure in his second marriage was passed to me by his friend's oral.
[Farewell in this life]
The past is like the sunset, and will gradually fall behind the valley.
Zhao Qi's affairs have been learned from his friends one after another. He and his second-married wife often quarrel, but Zhao's father still forced him to give birth to a son, while Zhao's mother still looked the same, living like a shadow.
But I never expected that I would receive the news from Zhao Qi again, and it was the bad news that he had a car accident.
I hated him at that time, but I never thought that Zhao Qi would go to another world.
As long as people live in the world, even if they have endless troubles, they will win if they live. But now that he has left, there is no more of him in the world.
Zhao Qi's friend said that he left in a car accident on his way back to his hometown. He hated the days of running a homestay, but he could not escape the shackles of his original family. Every time Zhao Qi goes out, Zhao’s father will urge him to go home. But Zhao Qi can never go home again.
After Zhao Qi left, Zhao's mother called me for the first time. Mama Zhao is also a poor woman. She has no self and has never been recognized by others. She cried for a long time and finally hoped that I would live a good life with my children.
hung up the phone, and I cried into tears. The man I loved, my child's father, will never see him again in my life.
[Life Insights]
Spring blossoms and autumn fruits, flowers, plants and trees can successfully complete their lives, but Zhao Qi's life ended like this.
Recalling all the things we are together, I just feel that life is like a dream. Sometimes I would rather we never meet and never fall in love.
My love and hatred for him have long dissipated over time.
but I really hope he can live well, but unfortunately there is no chance.
If there is a next life, I hope he can be born in a loving family. I hope he can have loving parents, beloved sisters, and a happy marriage.
After telling our story, tears fell all over the ground without realizing it. Why is life so hard, and why is life and death apart happening around us.
We didn't even say goodbye. The person I once truly loved will never come back.
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