01
As the saying goes, "Everything is fate, no one can do anything to others."
deeply agrees!
In the road of life, many things are controllable, and there are also many things that cannot be controlled, such as love and marriage.
Every time, when my husband and I had a fierce quarrel, my mother-in-law would persuade me with, "In this life, who will you live with, it is all fate. If you have the fate, you won't touch him, and if he has the fate, he won't touch you."
At that time, I always felt that my mother-in-law said so to protect her husband.
Until my husband and I, who had been married for more than 10 years, had quarrels for more than 10 years, had N divorces, but failed to divorce again and again. And the first love that pampered me and loved me broke up after a conflict. I had to doubt at first that this was the destined fate and I couldn't escape even if I wanted to.
02
Before I met my husband, I had an ex-boyfriend Achao who had been talking to me for 2 years and regarded me as a treasure.
Achao is my classmate. At that time, we studied at the same vocational and technical school, . He and I were both 18 years old that year.
The same age, the same class, the same hometown, and the same honest and introverted personality, I soon noticed him.
I am a precocious girl. Maybe influenced by martial arts movies at that time, I always want to find a partner as honest as " Guo Jing ". I feel that an honest man is more reliable, and A Chao just meets my requirements.
Once you have a goal, you must take action. I began to show my kindness to him on my own initiative, chat with him if I have anything to do, and care about him in my daily life. Soon, Achao fell into the love net I kidnapped for him.
At that time, people were very simple in love. After class, he and I would go to the park for a walk and heart-to-heart talk, and there were also intimate actions that were to hold hands.
We have been in love in school for more than half a year. After graduation, we went to different cities to develop, and we maintained letters. At that time, mobile phones were still a "luxury product", and we who had just left the society could not afford it.
Achao's letters telling him the pain of longing for me, and I was deeply moved. So, he made up his mind and would not marry him in this life.
As a result, things are unpredictable, and we were separated in the end.
03
I had been in contact with Achao for more than half a year. I couldn't help but feel for love, ran to the city where he was, and finally ended the "long-distance relationship" mode.
For more than a year together, he took great care of me and once spoiled me as a "little princess" who couldn't take care of myself.
Our company is not far away. Every day he will get up early to buy me a good breakfast. After get off work, he can buy groceries, cook, and wash clothes. I will do it next to me. Most of the time, he doesn't let me do it, just let me accompany him.
He said, "Women are used to spoil, what is it for men to be tired."
All the sweetness of love, he has taken me to experience. He will remember my birthday and all the anniversaries, and will surprise me on those anniversary.
is such an unforgettable first love that ended in failure!
Because I am still young, my family disagreed after knowing about it. Achao's father is a very smart person. He didn't want to pay the bride price. This violated my parents' bottom line. At that time, in the countryside, it was embarrassing not to give bride price without bride price in his daughter's family.
Even later, Achao threatened his father with his life to give a bride, and my parents disagreed with the marriage. They thought that I would suffer grievances after marrying, and this relationship ended without success.
04
According to classmates, after the breakup, Achao had a fight with his parents for a long time. And I locked myself in the house for a whole month and refused to go out.
Two years later, my parents began to ask relatives and friends to introduce blind dates to me everywhere. It was strange that I had a relationship with each other about 3-4 times, but they didn't work. Either others looked down on me or I looked down on others.
Later, I simply gave up and didn't want to go on blind dates again. I was 22 years old at that time, and my parents began to worry because I was in the countryside at that time and had not gotten married after 25 years old, so it was difficult to find a partner. They began to say that I was an old girl and blamed me for not dating so early, but now they have fallen to the point of being single.
Faced with the urging of my parents to get married, my relationship was not going well, and I became irritable. It was at this time that I met my current husband.
At that time, online chat had just been on the rise for a few years. I was depressed and often went to Internet cafes to chat with netizens to relieve loneliness. My husband was one of my netizens at that time.
I actually hate frivolous people very much, but I don’t dislike him. During the first chat, he started a video call. When he met for the second time, he took the initiative to kiss me again, and I didn't dodge. I don’t know if I really like it or the right time we encountered it, but in short, we are developing very fast.
He broke all my requirements for men! Now I feel that he really has nothing but handsome, has no money, is immature, like a child, but it’s just such a person, we got together.
05
My husband and I talked about it for about a year and met each other's parents. His parents were very satisfied with me, and my parents were also very satisfied with him. They thought he was the only child in the family, handsome and honest.
So, the marriage was put on the agenda. There is a biggest problem with free love, that is, the in-laws are unwilling to give gifts, and their words are consistent, "It's good that the two children have a good relationship, the bride price is just a ceremony."
This time, although my parents were also very angry, they refused to break up us. They just lowered the bride price standard and endured it with my in-laws again and again. At that time, I was very surprised that before, they would never agree to this marriage.
Afterwards, I asked my mom, "When I married him, I made such an unhappy thing about the bride price. Aren't you afraid that he will treat me badly in the future?"
"He looks like an honest person, and he is the only son in the family. You will be happy in the future." My mom replied to me, at that time, I really wanted to ask my mom, then my ex-boyfriend is not more honest, but just not handsome.
After getting married, all the shortcomings of my husband were exposed. He was a mama boy, selfish and irresponsible. We had a big quarrel every three days and a small quarrel every two days. Sometimes, I can't help but complain about my mother, complaining that she didn't stop the marriage at that time.
"You talked about it yourself, who do you blame? We are just giving you a reference. Who would have thought that he would be such a person." Every time I complain, it will attract my mother's retort.
06
To this day, he and I have been married for more than 10 years. We have not become in love because of time, but have reached the point of "turning enemies".
"If you don't live well, you can't live without you." This sentence is a true portrayal of our marriage.
He is playful and content with the status quo. I work hard and work hard. He can't change it. I can't stand it, but it's in this state. We have maintained it until now.
I often think, I don’t love him, and he doesn’t love me, why can’t we go without you? Now I figure it out.
There is a saying that love in this life, debt in the past life. It means that I owe him what I had in my previous life and I came to pay off my debts in this life, so what else can I complain about?
It is said that fate between husband and wife is destined by heaven! I didn't believe it before. After more than 10 years of marriage, I have to believe that the people we meet in our lives are the people that should appear in our lives. But some people come to repay their kindness, and some people come to repay their debts. When the debts are all settled, the fate will naturally end.
Ex-boyfriend took great care of me and came to repay me. My husband is a mama's boy and came to collect debts from me.
Since I owed debts in my previous life, I should repay them in this life!
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