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Text/Beiwang | Photo/Network & Binglinger
@Anonymous: Hello, can I tell you a little worries? Recently, when I got home, my mother always nagged me: "You are in your twenties and you are about to go to the third year of your life. It's time to talk about marriage." What's even more annoying is that some people at home say this, and other relatives also say a few words. I was a little anxious about getting older, but after hearing what they said, I felt even more anxious.
Then even big data came to make a comeback and pushed me a topic: #Does age bring you anxiety or courage? I subconsciously wanted to answer "anxiety". So what about you? Will you feel anxious because of getting older? Or are you becoming braver the more you live?
What a coincidence, I seem to have also viewed the topic of #Age brings you anxiety or courage #.
But I didn't click to read it carefully. Maybe I feel that I have more courage than anxiety in the experience of getting older , so I glanced over.
� How did it be done?
actually doesn't.
In the past, I also cared about age because the standard was that - it was best to get married at the age of 24, and a 30-year-old girl was considered old.
This is still a timeline I think is relatively loose. (laughs)
pictures from Bing Ling'er's picture submission
We Chaoshan area , there is an adult gift at the age of 15. After passing this threshold, everyone will tell you: "You have grown up and are an adult."
In addition, girls usually get married at the age of 20-22, and 24 years old is considered late in the eyes of some elders. (Puff, it looks a bit funny now)
In an environment like this, I have not done anything yet, and sometimes I play with kids in the field. Do you think I have age anxiety?
not only will, but may be a hundred times as anxious as you.
Then why did it become indifferent afterwards?
Think about it carefully, it should be related to reading.
I have a better life. Although I almost like other girls in the village can only go to junior high school at most, I still have the chance to go to college later.
After seeing a larger world, you will find that there is a prairie outside the bottom of the well. It turns out that the sky is infinitely vast, the universe is blurred and mysterious. Life is not just about getting married, having children, taking care of grandchildren, and burying into the soil.
More importantly, you will realize that what the public stipulates is not the only correct one.
Apart from the accidents, life has at least eighty or ninety years. Why should you hurry to do the so-called "big things in life" that everyone stipulates before you even figure out yourself in the ten or twenty years?
You see the wonderful scenery of life
When you read a book, the teacher talked about consumption concepts and said one of the points: Don’t blindly follow . But in life, most people follow blindly. So you will see that many people are forced to get married and have children or do things against their will.
Finally, the fact is that people's sense of happiness is generally not high.
However, progress in the times also requires process.
Therefore, is trapped in the feudal ideological environment, and nagging by elders at home is inevitable. I have been talking about it for several years, and at first I was anxious, as if I didn’t do what they said, you are just an “outlier, monster.”
And people are keen on killing “monsters”.
At that time, whenever there were any news about the tragedy caused by being urged to marry, I forwarded it to my friends one by one, and I almost named @天子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子子�
But everything has its own development rules. You have not met at this time and you really have to find someone to do it?
They don’t understand, no matter what you think, but you can’t follow it and ignore it! This is my own life.
Anyway, I can't get through the straits in my heart, so I continue reading and continue to discover things that are more worthy of my self-restraint or more willing to invest in. It seems that it is like this that I began to learn to strengthen my heart.
so many
"
"""
They like to worry about it in the name of "care". There is a saying in psychology that "projection psychology". Freud also said: "Any suppressed emotions will make a comeback in an ugly way."
If you really want to dig deeper into your heart, except for a small part of them who really care about you, I guess: one is that their own marriage is unhappy, so I hope you (replace them who can no longer return) can have a happy marriage; the other is that they are unhappy, so they can't stand you alone and be free and easy.
so, there is a saying: Those who cannot live their own lives will always think about interfering in other people's lives.
In this way, when I think that those who are urging marriages may not be as happy as possible, I will feel that I should give them some help and let them have a good time. As for myself, I have worked hard to put my ears down.
Why do you want to be bound by people or anxiety?
If you really bother with age anxiety and don’t know what to do, then go and study. Read a lot of books and communicate with wise men. Maybe one day you will find the answer.
There is a saying that goes: is not too late to grow up at any age.
Moreover, putting age and life together, it is recommended to keep this passage in mind: 18 is beautiful, not because you are beautiful, but because you are beautiful at the age of 18; 30 is beautiful, not because you are beautiful at the age of 30, but because you are beautiful. You are still beautiful at the age of 40, not because you are beautiful at the age of 40, nor because you are beautiful, but because you live beautifully.
"Hey, what are you talking about? Hurry up, you are almost 30!"
"But go to yours, you don't just live to 30 years old..."
So, for you: # age brings you anxiety or courage?
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