I am Polaris, a Hunan girl from Xiangxi, Hunan. She is 37 years old this year. She married her Taiwanese husband who is 9 years older and has given birth to two children. She has lived in Taiwan for 17 years.

This is the 918th real person we tell

I am a Polaris, a Hunan girl from Xiangxi, Hunan. She is 37 years old this year. She married her Taiwanese husband who is 9 years older. She has given birth to two babies and has lived in Taiwan for 17 years.

I lost my father since I was a child, and my mother gritted her teeth and insisted on sending me to study. After work, I met my husband through a relative's introduction and soon started a family in Taiwan. After that, we worked together to work hard, relying on each other day and night, and accompanying each other in spring and autumn. Now that the eldest son is in high school, the younger son is already in elementary school.

If life is bittersweet, then I will be bitter first and then sweet. Those who have passed through hardships not only have a strong heart, but also have a compassionate heart.

(I am now)

In 1985, I was born in a minority mountainous area in Xiangxi, Hunan. It is remote and poor. Most people make a living by farming. It would be great if they can solve the problem of food and clothing.

When I was a child, there was no road in the village. When I went to the town to go to the market, I could cross mountains and ridges for a few hours before I could reach the town. The lively and dazzling array of goods in the town, as well as the fragrant snacks, are what children yearn for.

The days when going to the market are all because you have to buy and sell things. So every time I go to the town, everyone has to carry heavy things on their shoulders, carry some things to sell, and then buy some essential items back.

Even if it is so hard, it is still the happiest thing for a rural child to go to the market. If parents say that they will carry things with adults to the market tomorrow, they will be excited all night and set off before dawn the next day.

I grew up in such a simple and pure working environment.

(Take your baby to bask in the sun)

Our family is six, I am the eldest, next are two sisters, and the youngest is the younger brother. Both parents are honest farmers and live on a few acres of thin land.

However, there are unexpected situations in the world. When I was nine years old, my father passed away unexpectedly. I didn't know what it meant at that time, and my mother carried all the pain alone.

After that, my mother took on the burden of raising our four siblings alone. Farming is a physical job. She carried all the work with her thin body, and planted food to raise us, and never remarried.

Because the family lacks labor, many people are afraid that we will ask for help, so they are "respectful" us. We who are short of clothing and food will be ridiculed by others. Mom endured all this silently.

She kept telling us: "It is poor now, but we have to be poor and tough. Other people's children can learn, and our children can also learn."

(Mom and our two sisters)

Mom doesn't talk much, but uses her actions to educate us to be independent and stronger. Even in such a difficult environment, she still offered me the middle school teacher.

I went to school early, and when I was 5 years old, I started to first grade. There are a lot of work in the countryside, and I am the boss again. Every time after school, I go home, throw away my schoolbag, and go to pick up pig vegetables or go to the mountain to chop a bundle of firewood to go home, and then cook food.

But this does not prevent me from having excellent grades. The teacher often says that I am a diligent and well-behaved child.

After I entered junior high school, my family was financially struggling and poor food and clothing, which made many people look down on me. My self-esteem was a little hurt and I became a little inferior. Fortunately, I received help from the teacher and the principal, and my grades have always been very good.

(a family that loves each other)

When a person survives in hardship and helplessness, if someone pulls you, you will be particularly grateful and cherish it. So, I have cherished those who have helped me throughout my life.

Although my grades have always been very good, I did not get into the ideal key high school when I was in the middle school entrance examination because of my excessive psychological pressure. But I didn't admit defeat, and then reviewed for a year and finally entered the score line of a key high school.

can't go to a key high school, so I hesitated again. Because my family’s financial conditions did not allow me to go to high school, and then I went to college, my younger brother and sister were still studying, and it was too difficult for my mother to support us in school alone.

At that time, the admission scores of technical secondary school were flush with those of key high schools. After careful consideration, I resolutely chose Changsha Normal School to study preschool education.

(I’m still my student days back)

When a person is in material poverty, survival is the first choice. Ideals require economic foundation support.

came to Changsha Normal School , and I became much happier. Here, we mainly learn the necessary professional skills of kindergarten teachers , such as piano, dance, painting, storytelling...

Sometimes, we also have to perform in various places, which has increased my knowledge. I have received a lot of help from teachers here and gained sincere friendship.

For three years, I not only grew up in my studies, learned professional skills, but also learned how to deal with people.

In the last semester of 2005, the school recommended us to go to a kindergarten in Guangzhou for internship for half a year, and then return to Changsha in the next semester to formally work in a kindergarten.

(Baby Lai’s mother’s arms)

At this time, I was 20 years old. Here, a 20-year-old girl should talk about marriage.

Then, the Taiwanese boy introduced to me by my relative came over to me on a blind date. I talked with him online because of his previous relationship with his relatives, and he was quite intimate. So, when I officially got to work, he and his parents came over to meet me formally.

At that time, it was a meeting arranged by relatives, and both parents arrived. We saw each other for the first time and felt as if we were already very familiar with each other. He is gentle, gentle and gentle, and he speaks gently. He looks like I like. Although he is 9 years older than me, he looks younger.

Both parents were quite straightforward. After asking us, we had no objection and decided to make the marriage.

Mr. html suggested taking me to Taiwan to see it. I was very young at that time and felt that others were very good. I had never been far away. I was curious about what Taiwan looked like, so I agreed.

That's it. When I was 20 years old, I followed my husband to Taiwan. Then, get married there and settle there.

(We're leaving)

Mr. 0 Home is in Taichung . His father-in-law is a soldier, his ancestral home is Hunan, and he followed the troops to Taiwan. His mother-in-law is a kind and humorous person. They have six children, the youngest of the husband, he has four sisters and one brother.

After graduating from university, Mr. Wang started working in a family business and distributing luxury goods business. After I got married, I didn’t think about being a housewife, but asked to go to work.

My parents-in-law likes people who love labor, so they arranged for me to work in a luxury store. I adapted there very quickly, and soon I did it with great care. Thanks to my experience for being able to adapt to the environment so quickly. In the hard environment in the past, I developed my spirit of hard work and perseverance. I was not afraid of hardships in anything and did it very carefully.

(Company Morning Fitness)

And it is this spirit of not being afraid of fatigue that makes my in-laws look at me with admiration, winning their likes, and also winning respect.

When I first arrived in Taiwan, I thought Taiwan’s things were very expensive. Later, when I went to work, I felt that the salary paid by Taiwanese people was also very high, and their overall consumption level was higher than that of the mainland.

It was in 2005. In Taiwan, the per capita salary of about 8,000 yuan per month, while in the mainland, the per capita salary of only about 3,000 yuan.

However, the mainland is developing rapidly, and the current salary should be the same as or surpass Taiwan.

In addition to the expensive things in Taiwan, the humidity is also quite heavy. However, the food here is not very good and is very talkative. They pay more attention to health preservation. It is very difficult for a Hunan girl like me who is not happy to be happy at once.

(Company beauties show together)

After we got married, we started living with our parents-in-law. When I am with them, I respect the tastes and thoughts of the elderly, and my mother-in-law is also very sensible, so we have never quarreled and there is no saying that parents-in-law discriminate against daughters-in-law from other places.

There are currently about 400,000 girls who married from mainland China to Taiwan, which Taiwanese people call "land supporters".They are more contemptuous. Some are very repulsive to foreign wives and are not very friendly. They seem to have a sense of superiority. In fact, the mainland is not bad now, or even better.

I am very lucky that the family I married is very open-minded.

Later, we had our own house. After I passed it alone, our housework was done by my husband and I. There is no such thing as Taiwanese men not doing housework. In fact, the gentleman is very family-oriented and rarely socializes or comes back late.

(Cute baby is ready to participate in the event)

I had a child in the second year of my marriage, and my maternity leave in Taiwan is 56 days. After 56 days, I continued to work. Because I had suffered hardships since I was a child, I was relatively independent. I think it was very safe to go to work.

So, I asked my mother-in-law to help me take care of the children, but my mother-in-law refused to take care of her grandson.

The elderly here know how to enjoy life. They feel that if they raise their children, they will complete their tasks. The second generation of raising them is not their business. Their elderly life is to plan what they want to do and what they want to play, and it is best to try not to burden their children.

. Parents in mainland China always try to help their son take care of their grandchildren and try to exhaust their spare time. How can there be grandparents who don’t take care of their grandchildren?

(study the event with colleagues)

Under the guidance of my husband, I also understood the old people's thoughts and felt that they did it right. Why can’t people have their own lifelong mission for their children? After raising children, they should bear the responsibilities they should bear. The so-called growth means being responsible for their own lives.

Later, I handed over the child to the nanny to manage. Nanny in Taiwan needs to go to a training institution to learn, learn common sense of parenting, deal with children’s aversion to milk, understand some basic medical knowledge and treatment methods, etc. After studying

, you will take the exam, pass the exam, and obtain the government-issued nanny practice certificate to be eligible to take care of your children.

I sent it to the nanny before going to work and picked it up after get off work. A nanny can usually bring one to three children. If I specially hire a nanny to take care of her at home, the labor cost is a problem. I also have to prepare a nanny room and weigh it over and over again, so I chose to send it to the nanny's house to take care of her.

(Come and play with dad)

has to work at work and it is really hard to take care of the children after get off work. But because I am young, I am not afraid of hard work. What I fear most is that my child catches a cold.

Children have poor resistance and tend to catch a cold if the weather changes a little. Fortunately, the hospitals here cost very little, and the registration fee is generally 50 yuan. Other examination fees and medical fees are not cost-effective unless imported from abroad.

This way the child is brought to the nanny until he is 2 years old, and then he can send it to kindergarten. The kindergartens here are also divided into public and private.

Public ones are cheaper, but they have to draw lots, and school is over early, so school usually ends at 4 pm.

private ones are more expensive, about 4,000 to 5,000 a month, and the cheapest ones are more than 2,000. In addition, each kindergarten also requires a registration fee ranging from several thousand to ten thousand, but it can be relaxed until 6 o'clock in the afternoon, and you will have to increase the money if you exceed 6 o'clock.

(Photo with a beautiful woman in the company)

Because I have to work, I can only choose private ones. My husband and I have to go to work, and when we get home, one will take care of the children and the other will do housework. Fortunately, the husband is very family-oriented and goes home to work after get off work, and is very patient.

Mr. pays more attention to the cultivation of children's moral qualities and good cultivation education. When a child is older, he must do things within his ability, such as sanitation, mopping the floor, and organizing his own internal affairs, which will definitely allow them to develop the habit of loving cleanliness and labour.

My husband and I work together and raise our children. Before I knew it, my eldest son is now in the first year of high school and my younger son is in the third grade of elementary school.

also implements nine years of compulsory education, but the first to third grades of primary school only have half a day, and school has to be over at 12 o'clock. So in Taiwan, most places have a family class, just like a cram school.

(two brothers who are in love)

Because many parents have to work, there is no time to take care of children in the afternoon.The staff of the Anqin class will help you take your child to the Anqin class, and then manage and tutor your child's homework in a unified manner.

The homework assigned by the teacher is basically completed by the student in the family class. At night, parents can pick up their children and sign the homework book.

Although it is nine years of compulsory education and schooling costs no money, the cost of going to the Anqin class is also very expensive, and the cheapest one is more than 1,000 yuan a month. If you want to learn English and mathematics, you have to calculate the tutoring fee.

So, education expenses are also a huge expense here. If the family is really in trouble, local people can also apply for poverty payments, and the government will provide some financial subsidies.

(do parent-child activities with children)

The teaching on the test is divided into grades, generally divided into four levels: ABCD, A is the best, D is below 60 points, which is relatively poor.

Taiwan’s junior high school entrance exams are also required to go to high school. The credit system is , but its credit system is not only the test scores, but also depends on your child’s performance in school.

Check whether you have participated in school club activities and charity activities. Whether you have asked for leave, whether you have full marks at attendance, etc. are all performances of quality in all aspects. The score in the exam is only counted as three points, and then the usual performance accounts for a very important score.

Therefore, parents should specially cultivate their behavioral standards. In fact, while cultivating them, they are also strengthening their own cultivation.

So, in public places in Taiwan, it is rare to hear loud noises. They speak softly and try not to disturb others.

(Take your children to participate in a Korean company trip)

is also rare to lose things. In Taiwan’s laws, there is a crime of embezzlement, which means that things that do not belong to you are taken and will not return them to others. This is called embezzlement. Therefore, if you lose something and others pick it up, you must return it. You cannot take it for yourself. Otherwise, once the owner sues, the law will be sentenced to the crime of embezzlement.

Once, my husband picked up a wallet on the road. There was a lot of money in the wallet. In terms of conversion, it was about seven or eight thousand yuan. He waited for the reign of the reign at that intersection for a while, but he hadn't come. Then call the police and send the wallet to the police station to feel at ease.

The people here are very restrained by their behavior and rarely see garbage thrown or spitting anywhere. It is also rare to see people walking the dogs taking their dogs to urinate and defecate anywhere. They will bring bags to clean the dogs and not pollute public resources.

(Auntie is so close)

There are also inconvenient things here. What do we buy in the mainland? We can do everything with a mobile phone, and we still have to bring cash out here. Many high-tech things can't catch up with the mainland.

Now, while I buy and sell luxury goods, I am also doing cosmetics business, both online and offline. We promote new products from time to time, and I hope our business will get better and better.

has lived in Taiwan for 17 years. I think the competitiveness here is not that great. People are more comfortable and pay more attention to the quality of life, which is very suitable for elderly care. People's hearts are also relatively precipitated, not so ambitious, or impetuous, and they are not competitive and progress so quickly.

What kind of life you choose is determined by your own thoughts. I am a person who prefers to do things quietly and live quietly, and it just fits me here.

(on a trip with friends)

In the years since I married Taiwan, I have gone back to reunite every year, or brought my mother to live there. My mother is healthy and still diligent and optimistic. During the epidemic, as long as the two sides of the Taiwan Strait allow, I will go back to visit my mother and other relatives.

Like other married daughters, I just married across provinces. Now the transportation is convenient. I miss my relatives and will go back to reunite. My siblings and mothers fall in love with each other, and the children and grandma are also very close.

I am an ordinary mainland daughter who married to Taiwan. I am very happy. I have a family that loves me, a home, a career that I like and a home I love. I look forward to the unification of the two sides of the Taiwan Strait more than anyone else, so it will be more convenient to go back to my parents' home.

[Oral: Polaris]

[Editor: Classical Chinese]

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