The two recent news aroused my attention
The prototype of the criminal of the "Suyuan case" in South Korea-Zhao Douchun, is about to be released from prison. The release date is December 13
Since ancient times, especially in Asian countries, we have been deeply rooted in the belief that girls should be well-behaved and sensible, and the most important thing is to be obedient! Many people in this society spit on Ma Baonan, but they feel unreasonable with "good girls", and even take this as a thing to be proud of. However, these good girls may have a weak personality, no ideas of their own, and lack of courage. Girls who dare to say no will bravely refuse people and things that they don't like!
Say no to the "authority"
There is a pair of siblings in our building, they often meet in the elevator, and they would say hello to each other on weekdays. One day I greeted them as usual. That sister was very indifferent to me. She even lowered the brim of her hat and regarded me as if she didn't know me. I was at a loss. Her mother looked at me and smiled and said, I was teaching her not to talk to strangers and get close, she can choose whom to talk to. I gave her a thumbs up and stopped actively greeting the child until she started to greet me.
First of all, a child is an independent life and individual. In many cases, the child’s expression of "rejection" is not a challenge to the parents, but as a demonstration of the rights consciousness of an independent individual. We should understand and respect his choice. Secondly, we should accept children who choose to "not be good girls" and not "little princesses", and allow them not to greet others, but we must understand the reasons behind them. In this way, children will gradually become aware of the decision-making power of their own existence as an individual, and gradually cultivate independent ideas. In the days to come, girls will have the courage to say no to teachers, leaders or other "authorities". !
Say no to "uncomfortable"
Now many children already know the meaning of "kiss", "touch" and "hug", so we have to start teaching children 6 at the latest kindergarten class at 7zzz. When you kiss you, raise your little hand and say no to them. and tell them who can touch Ta's body. Although Brother Dou is a boy, I always tell him how to protect his body and say no to the "uncomfortable" touch!
The news in the picture below once happened in a bookstore in Shanghai. Because the boy was only 10 years old, he was unable to treat him legally. However, the child's mother chose to disclose the incident on Weibo, calling everyone's attention. The saddest thing is that the boy's mother actually said "Your daughter agreed." Why else let him touch it?
Say no to "gift"
This can also be understood as saying no to "gift" and "temptation". The kindergarten of
Dou Ge conducted an anti-abduction test, allowing volunteers to pretend to be passers-by or parents’ acquaintances to contact children, and test the children with different abduction methods. After learning about this test, our parents confidently said that they would teach children on weekdays and would not be fooled. The result was "annihilated"! The teacher's summary of the reasons for being deceived is as follows:
The strange aunt said to buy sweets: 11,5 men and 6 women (including Bean brother)
The strange aunt said to buy toys: 3 boys, 2 girls
When others left, follow along: 5 A girl
and in recent years college students have nude loansThere are also endless, and some have also led to girls being forced to commit suicide. All these make us pay attention to, and we must know how to say no to all kinds of "tempts" for girls to be educated from an early age! They all say that when someone else’s mouth is soft, then other people’s hands are short. When children are young, they will ask us. When they enter school, they will make their own choices, but they must tell them not to accept other people's things easily.
said no to "please"
Jiang Fangzhou once shared in "The Round Table" that she always pleased her mother when she was a child and made herself a good girl. This way of ingratiating others is also copied into the intimate relationship . Once quarreled with her boyfriend, the other party kept scolding her loudly, and she kept apologizing. Later, when she saw her boyfriend calling, she was trembling and afraid to answer the phone, but she didn't have the courage to say to the person , "I don't like you doing this, I don't want to talk to me!"
She once felt that she had a very good life Suffering, she later realized that she always catered to others' expectations, cared about other people's development, and did not dare to express her emotions , she began to heal herself slowly.
Say no to "school bullying"
In the eyes of many people, campus bullying is even just a fight. actually not. There are several things you should pay attention to and be aware of. If these situations occur, you need to give your children guidance and action support at the first time:
1, unexplained injuries on the body
2, frequent "lost" or "damage" yourself Stationery, school bags and other items
3, negative emotions, unwilling to go to school, or even pretending to be sick
4, unwilling to communicate
5, unwilling to deal with others touching the body
6, suddenly asking for a lot of pocket money to carry
7, trying to carry
We should take the initiative to "chat" with our children every day and talk about daily school things. For example, we can ask "Who do you like to play with most at school?" "Are there any classmates you don't like, why?" and many more.
In the early stage of childhood, we must teach children to defend their position, especially not to be afraid to express their dislikes. Girls are naturally afraid to express resistance and insist on their opinions, because we teach them to be sensible, behave, and obedient. Therefore, we must deliberately teach them to boldly "express anger, rejection and counterattack"! If others infringe on their own interests and bottom line, the child can refuse. Blindly forbearance and accommodation will not be respected by others, only more infringement.
At home, we can show our children how to deal with it, or use cartoons, picture books and other tools to teach children, especially girls, to bravely say "no"!
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Dou Ma Annie is the original author of multi-platform codewords. If you need to reprint, please contact me. Plagiarism is shameful! Recommended articles from previous issues
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