The world of children is actually a "social system" . Here children may also be bullied, such as campus bullying, which is a typical phenomenon.
How should parents educate their children when they are wronged or bullied?
When the child is bullied, the worst parents always say "it's okay" to the child
When the child's things are snatched away by other children, the parents say to the child: "It doesn't matter, let him play for a while."
When the child accidentally trips by other children, the parents tell the child, "It's okay, he didn't mean it."
The child was deliberately beaten and cried by another child, and even was injured. The child’s parents brought the child to apologize, and the parents were still saying to the child, "It’s okay, it’s okay."
Parents who say "it's okay" are because of face, some are really timid, and some hope that their children will learn to be tolerant, but do you really don't feel sorry for your children at all?
In fact, parents will have a great impact on their children if they do this.
One situation is that if the child is wronged, his rights and interests cannot be maintained, and his inner feelings are ignored, he will feel that his parents are unreliable, and he will feel that his parents are unreliable, which will greatly affect the parent-child relationship and will be detrimental to the implementation of family education in the future.
The most dangerous thing is that if the child encounters something similar to being bullied in the future, he will not tell his parents again, because it is useless to tell them, which will lead to the parents being unable to understand the child's situation in time, further causing the child to be bullied more seriously.
Another situation is that parents’ wrong response methods affect their children, resulting in the children not being guided correctly. When facing bullying in the future, they may not know how to deal with it.
Some children may respond violently, some children have completely lost their sense of boundaries and retreated from bullying others. They know nothing about protecting themselves and become vassals of Nono.
When the child was bullied, second-rate parents kept forcing the child to "beat back"
When Xiaohua was having dinner with Xiaohua, Xiaohua's child was full and went to the children's area of the hotel to play, but after a while, the child ran back and said that he was beaten by several children in the children's area.
When Xiaohua heard this, he immediately pushed the child and asked in detail about the specific situation of the child being beaten. After confirming that it was the other party’s fault, Xiaohua asked the child to “beat back”. After hearing his mother’s words, the child also “bravely” returned to the children’s area.
However, what happened next gave Xiaohua a little headache because after the child returned to the children's area, he held his fist with four hands, but was beaten by someone else.
In fact, although it is a tough approach to let children fight back, there are often some bad results:
Like Xiaohua's child, he wants to fight back, but he can't beat others and is beaten up.
When the child beats someone else, he feels the "pleasure" of violently solving problems, and then he turns from a victim to a perpetrator.
The child replied to the phone, but he did not pay attention, which resulted in serious consequences and faced a lot of financial compensation issues.
Therefore, it is inappropriate to simply ask the child to call back, because the child lacks certain ability to judge and analyze situations and fails to achieve ideal rights protection results.
First-class parents teach their children to protect themselves and solve problems calmly
First-class parents have good educational methods. When their children are bullied by others, parents will tell their children to understand grievances as soon as possible. When you see that the other party is stronger, you must learn to be ruthless and not to violate the situation when the two parties have a huge gap in strength. You will be hurt. Although teaching children to choose to compromise when they are bullied, it is not to let the children listen directly to the other party and be slaughtered.
When the child is out of danger, the child should tell the parents about this matter as soon as possible. The parents should come to the school to solve the problem. If the parents come forward, the child will be afraid when he sees the parents coming.
If the child tells the teacher about this, in order not to cause a series of trouble, the teacher will only criticize the perpetrator, which may make the perpetrator feel resentful and bully our children again.
When encountering difficulties, telling children how to face problems calmly and get rid of danger in a timely manner. After getting rid of danger, finding a way to escape from the control of the perpetrator is the correct educational method.
Have you learned it?
