Chat Misunderstanding 1: Always like to accuse children
In family education , many parents like to reason to show that they are correct. However, they ignore the communication between their children and their parents, and hope that their parents can understand their ideas.
For example, if the child complains to his parents about being frustrated today, some parents will say, "Why are you doing something, others are okay?"
When parents say this, the child will have nothing to say, because the child feels that you have not thought about problems from his perspective, have not become a listener to the child, and understand their mood.
Chat misunderstanding 2: Splashing cold water for children
Many parents believe that praising children will make children develop a proud and complacent personality. When it is time to praise them, they choose to belittle their children or pour cold water for children.
For example, if the child passes the second place in the class and thinks he can be praised, the parents say, "Why did he get the second place? Why is it not the first place?" Such an evaluation will make the child think that this is a kind of criticism and suppress the child's self-confidence.
Chat misunderstanding 3: Use anger to replace calm education
Some parents will criticize their children after hearing the teacher’s negative comments on their children when they go home. In fact, the children have realized that they are doing something wrong. If parents can communicate calmly and understand the reasons for their children’s mistakes, the children will definitely correct it. Every child wants to get praise from their parents through changes.
Three major communication skills
Communication skills 1: Friendly communication with children
The best way to communicate is to communicate with children between friends. Some parents find this difficult. In fact, only by having friends-style communication with their children can we deeply understand their children's ideas, which will affect their children's world outlook and outlook on life. Therefore, the most important thing for parents to communicate with their children is to listen and understand like friends, rather than indoctrinate them.
Communication skills 2: Appropriately praise the child
The affirmation and praise given to the child by parents will become a kind of inner strength in the child. Even if the child is frustrated in the future, he can love himself, believe in himself, and will not give up. When complimenting, you must be sincere, recognize from the bottom of your heart, and objectively evaluate your child's behavior, rather than praise him with some exaggerated words. At the same time, the praise of "not worthy of the name" will also make children think that you are perfunctory and not taking it seriously, causing rebelliousness. Sometimes it will put pressure on children, thinking that they are "not worthy of" such praise, which will make them more retreat and unconfident.
Communication skills 3: Empathize with your child
When the child is frustrated, when communicating with the child, stand from the child's perspective, tell the child that I understand your current feelings, and then give the child a hug so that he can feel your care and understanding of him. Such a hug looks ordinary, but in fact, it can give a child a great sense of security. When they gain a sense of psychological security, the negative feelings will gradually disappear.
With listening parent-child communication, the emotional bond between parents and children will be established, and children will trust their parents more and are willing to get along with them.
What do you also know to pay attention to when communicating with your children? Welcome to share with us in the comment section!
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