There is an old Chinese saying: "Five filial piety in life is the first priority. Since ancient times, filial piety has been the source of all things."
What parents hope most is not how great their children can achieve, but to raise a kind and filial child who can understand and treat themselves well.
How many parents are working hard for their children and their children, but they still cannot get their children's gratitude.
Some people attribute this to fate, but they don’t know whether a child is filial or not often sees clues when he is young.
Those children who grow up are unfilial often have these 4 characteristics when they are young. If your children also have them, please be sure to correct them as soon as possible. In the parent-child reality show " Super Parent-Child ", there is a child named Ding Ding who is very impressive.
He is only 3 years old this year, but he is very possessive.
When playing in an amusement park, you often have disputes with other children, or even take action.
When he was playing on the slide, he saw other children climbing up and pushed the person down, not allowing the other party to come up and play together.
Facing the building blocks he likes, whenever someone else takes one, he will take it. When you can't grab it, you can just put your mouth on it and bite other kids.
Dingding's parents also had headaches about this, saying that the same is true for their son at home and they almost never want to share it with others.
In life, there are actually many children like Ding Ding.
They often act a little overbearing and control their own things very closely.
Even if parents touch what they believe, they will cry and even do more extreme behaviors.
However, many parents only regard this as their children's temporary willfulness and do not pay attention to it. They always feel that their children will become sensible when they grow up.
But I didn’t think that behind those super possessive desires and the lack of understanding of sharing is the selfishness of the children.
And once the seeds of selfishness are planted, they will take root and sprout in the heart of the child.
If no discipline is given, it will only become more and more serious as you grow older.
is like the sentence left by my ancestors: "Steal needles when I was young, and steal gold when I grew up."
I still remember that in the TV series " Children's Enemies ", Zhang Kaili, the mother who played the role of Zhang Kaili, made a table of dishes for her children with painstaking efforts.
In order to take care of the taste of her pregnant daughter and her daughter-in-law preparing for pregnancy, the children have already eaten it, and she is still busy all the time.
But when she finished everything, the children had already eaten and drank enough, and there was not much left on the table.
She could only soak the rice in boiling water to fill her stomach. The scene of
is really heartbreaking to watch.
Mothers are still able to move freely, and their children are only concerned about themselves.
If one day, the mother is really old and has difficulty moving, how can she expect her child to be filial and dedicated to her?
Don’t underestimate children’s selfish habits and take their domineeringness for granted.
Teaching children to share and understand the difficulties of parents so that children can stay away from the soil of selfishness.
There is a praiseworthy saying on the Internet: "The biggest tragedy of parents is that they give everything but cannot raise a grateful child."
Think about it carefully, this is the reason.
Children who do not know how to be grateful are like an endless abyss, and sooner or later they will squeeze out everything from their parents one by one.
They never know how to ask for it blindly, but never understand the difficulty of their parents.
I have seen a news.
A man named Lin Zhipeng in Hunan asked his parents for 4 million to start a business.
After learning that their parents could not take it out, they frowned and beat the two elderly men to the point of being bruised.
What is even more shocking is that Lin Zhipeng is also a highly educated master and has been dependent on his parents at home for ten years.
Since childhood, his academic performance has been among the best, but his parents are busy with work and have to raise him at the home of his grandparents in the countryside.
The elderly always feel particularly sorry for their children. Not only do they never let their grandson work, but they also meet their requests.
Later, the old man passed away and his parents took him back.
I felt that I had not been able to accompany my son in the past and I owe him an extraordinary favor.
This also made Lin Yuepeng feel that as long as it is his request, his parents should meet it unconditionally; since their parents have given birth to him, they should be responsible to him to the end.
Everyone says: "Spoiling a son is like killing a son."
This is true. Those spoiling is not true love, but chronic harm in the name of love.
The more indulge parents, the more arrogant their children become.
When one day, parents can no longer meet their children's needs, the resentment will grow wildly.
When children become accustomed to their parents' efforts, they will ignore the efforts and hardships behind them.
There is a famous conclusion in psychology:
"Saying gratitude is a psychological habit formed over a long period of time, and it depends on the accumulation formed in every specific and subtle event."
Parents are the best mentors for their children. In the details of life, they tell their children that every porridge, rice, and a stitch of thin thread are hard to come by.
Only when children know that it is difficult to come by will they know how to cherish it; only by understanding the painstaking efforts of their parents can they be grateful.
A while ago, I saw a poor mother in the parent-child documentary program "Participation in Parenting".
Because she put away the tablet at home, her 8-year-old son got angry and beat and scolded her.
Even though she was crying and begging, her son still refused to let go.
She said that her son usually likes to play with tablets very much, and sometimes he can even play for 7-8 hours, and he will not let go until the battery drains.
She also tried to set a password, but her son would lose his temper at her and even attack her.
Horny, she told the child the password again.
Although my son is only 8 years old, he is very strong and beat her up every time. In addition to the pain in his body, he also feels heartache.
In the comment section, netizens were talking about it:
Some people say that the mother is too weak, and some people say that their children will do it. Even if they beat and scolded, they will do the same thing next time. I really don’t know how to teach it?
In recent years, there has been more than one such thing.
Lianyungang, Jiangsu Province, a boy bit his mother's arm tightly and refused to give up because his mother didn't buy him a toy.
In Wuhan subway station, a mother was kicked several times by her daughter because she was in the wrong car.
There are many invisible places, and this phenomenon also exists.
Nowadays, living conditions are getting better and better, and many children are raised in their hands.
Some children will not be able to help losing their temper and even attack their elders.
Don’t think that it doesn’t matter if your child is still young. You must know that a thousand-mile dike will be destroyed by an ant hole.
Today's temporary indulgence may lead to endless troubles.
At the age when children rely on their parents the most, they don’t talk about any affection. How can they hope that their parents will grow old and that their children can develop more awe and make them have a support for their old age?
I heard a saying: "A child without a sense of responsibility is a debt that parents can never repay in their lives."
If the child cannot bear the burden of life, he needs his parents to repay it.
But everyone will get old one day.
When parents are in a state of twilight and their bodies and energy are gone, they can rely on their children connected by blood.
If the child has no sense of responsibility, the parents' life will never be peaceful.
I have seen a report:
There is a man named Pan Jie in Hunan. At the age of 34, he has already dated blind dates 59 times.
However, it was not a success once, because at the age of 34, he is still dependent on his parents at home and is addicted to games all day long.
However, he attributed the reason for his failure to date because his parents did not have an in-depth understanding of the woman's family.
Many people sympathize with the experience of the Pan family’s parents, saying how they raised such a bastard.
Everything has a cause and only when it comes to the results. Only through the interview with reporters can everyone know that the reason why Pan Jie became like this is inseparable from his parents' spoiling.
Even though Pan Jie has long been adult, his parents still regard him as a child and never let him down for work, let alone take any responsibility.
Therefore, Pan Jie later asked the woman to "must raise him" at the blind date scene, and his various evil deeds of beating his parents.
Professor Li Meijin said:
"If parents don't let their children learn to share the affairs of the family since childhood, then the children will not have a sense of responsibility to the family. When their parents get old in the future, they will not understand what filial piety is."
Don't just worry about their children and don't let them bear any responsibility.
No matter how deeply parents love their children, they cannot protect their children for the rest of their lives.
Teaching children to take responsibility can help them better go against the current on the road of life and let parents and parents have a place to support them in their old age.
The so-called filial piety is not only grateful for the kindness of parents, but also a sense of responsibility.
I like a saying: "A family's greatest show of wealth is not to be rich and rich, but to raise a child who knows how to be grateful."
Even if you have ten thousand taels of gold, it is not as kind as the kindness and filial heart of children.
In this world, where is there any child born unfilial?
Children are like white paper. What they want to outline is mostly up to the parents to decide.
On the road to growth, please give your children more attention and care and pay attention to every little habit of them.
When those bad winds begin to appear, light a bright light as soon as possible so that children can go into darkness.
Set a good example and teach children the best nourishment through words and deeds.
Click [Watching] , I hope that the hearts of parents in this world can be cherished and responded;
May every family be able to raise filial children, remember their parents' kindness in their hearts, and one day they will repay their kindness.
Author | Su Wan, I want to use words to heal the desolation in your heart.
picture | Internet (If there is any infringement, please contact us to delete it)
