There are many parents who support their children in old age, right? Just like the old man in the article, he takes care of his children when he gets old. This is a matter of course. But have you ever heard of something? That's like being a child, and you still have to pay. You have worked hard to raise your children. Now that you are taking care of them when you are old, do you still need to give them money?
If it were you, would you give them money? It seems that many elderly people don't give it, and they think it shouldn't be given. But after reading this article, your understanding will definitely be refreshed. Why do you say that? Let's take a look at this matter together.
case story sharer,
75-year-old Uncle Wu:
I am 75 years old this year. I have been raising my children here for two years. It has been very good for me, but it has only been good in the last year. The year before was not good at all. After comparing these two years, I discovered one thing.
I have to tell you that you need to give money to your children when you are raising them in old age, otherwise you will be like me before. Let me tell you about my personal experience. I hope that through this case, all the elderly will pay attention. There is nothing to be ashamed of, sometimes things are just like this, and it is very realistic that you have to face it.
And I believe this will happen to every old person. Two years ago, I retired with my children. But it was my child who came back to pick me up. My child told me, you are our father, you are over 70 years old now, you can come to our place to take care of yourself. Originally I wanted to say no, but now I am able to take care of myself. Why go to them and talk to them?
So I told him not to go now. Let’s talk about it later. I really need you to support me in my old age. I will go to your place when the time comes, and I will not go over now. But my child said, you are already old, so just come over to us. What if something happens? A few days ago, something happened to an old man in our unit.
A few days ago we were talking and laughing with the old man, who is the father of the leader. The leader specially arranged for him to work in our department. I'm already in my 60s and almost 70 years old. But I can't see it these two days. Why can't I see it? Aren't you just asking for sleep?
The old man lives alone at home. Our leader often travels on business, and one day he comes back. He saw his father lying on the ground. If my leader hadn't been on business trips frequently. Then this thing will most likely not happen. I am also very afraid that something like this will happen, so I think you should come to us. We will take care of you and you will feel more at ease.
You are doing well and we can work with peace of mind, don’t you think so? What do we do if something goes wrong? How will we explain to our mother in the future? When my mother passed away, I promised my mother that I would be responsible for you. I still want to refuse, but how should I refuse now?
My child saw that I didn’t speak, and then he told me that he was not afraid of 10,000 but was afraid of what if something happened? Sometimes there are things you should pay attention to. The thing I lead is a good example. The more my children say this, the more uncomfortable it becomes for me. I am also very afraid of these things, but if I go to your place now, will I bother you?
Then I told the children, it’s not that I don’t want to go, I’m afraid that I will disturb your life after going to your place. You are living a good life now. There's no need for me to go over and disturb you. I can't take care of myself in the future, so I'll go over there then.
But my child said to me, we are not afraid, what are you afraid of? Just come here and we'll be responsible for taking care of you. It would be even worse for us if you didn't come, but we can live better with you. My child has said this, how can I refuse? I really can't find a reason to refuse.
Then I went to my kids. As long as I'm still there, I won't give them any money in the future. I don’t think I should give them money. After all, they asked me to come here for retirement, and I don’t have much money.Later I found out that I was the only one who felt uncomfortable if they didn’t give me money. I didn't pay them, they just asked me to do this and that. Although these things are things within my ability, they are very busy.
My child told me that we have to go to work and there is no time to do housework. If you are free at home, please help more. I believe many elderly people have heard this sentence, and many elderly people have chosen to help, just like me. From morning to night, I have to do everything by myself. It was originally agreed that she would come here to provide for her elderly care, but now she comes here to work as a nanny.
dare not speak out when faced with these things. Who do you dare to tell? Many old people are like this, and you have to be considerate of children. Even if you come here, you won’t dare to go back. What will others say about you when you go back? Many old people want to save face, including me. When I first came here, others thought I was living a good life.
If I go back, what will they say about me then? So I don't really want to go back. Moreover, my child told me that if you can run and move now, you should continue to shine. We need you. We are so busy with work that we cannot have time to take care of our children. You can help us when you come, right?
Our life has been much better since you came here, just because of you. When the child said this, I couldn’t laugh or cry. What could I say? Can I still refuse to do things? The more this happens, the more uncomfortable I feel. I am busy from morning to night, doing everything, and I finally wait until they have a holiday. But they were sitting there playing on their phones and watching TV.
When it was time to eat, they asked me, can I eat? We were very hungry, and the food was not cooked yet... I was immediately pissed off. I asked them to help with cooking in the morning. But they were sitting there playing with their phones. He even told me to come over right away. Then a whole morning passed without even a visit to the kitchen.
Now he told me that he wanted to eat. I cook for the whole family by myself. It couldn't be that fast, besides, it was only after 11 o'clock. They told me that I usually eat late at work, but if I don’t go to work now, I can eat earlier. Let me cook earlier.
I already have a temper. Let's just say that now, I immediately got angry, and then I went back to the room without cooking any more. At that time, I thought they would cook later, but at about 2 o'clock in the morning, they did not cook, but they told me, why did we think you went back? We thought you knew how to cook... Then It's just that they think forget it, they can't be relied on.
Later I figured something out. That's because I didn't give them money. After coming here, you can eat and drink for free. This word may be a bit strong. But this is indeed the truth. I haven't given them a penny since I came here, but they still want to provide me with food, drink, and toiletries.
Although they are my biological children, this society is very realistic and everything requires money. And for the elderly, what are you keeping so much money for? Money only makes sense if you use it. If you keep your money and don't use it, what's the difference between it and a pile of waste paper? Is not it? Then I took out the money.
I have a pension of more than 3,000 a month. Then I also made some savings, about 300,000. My savings haven't moved much. Give them 3,000 yuan a month. I told them, these are my food expenses, and I will subsidize you 3,000 per month. After giving them 3,000 yuan, I still have a few hundred yuan left, which I can only spend for a month.
My savings haven't moved at all. They don't want my money. But I still gave them the money, and they told me that since you have come to live with us, we should be responsible for you, and those who should not give money are not a family. Then I told them that there is no use for me to keep the money. I might as well lighten the burden on your family because your life is so difficult.
They still wanted to refuse, but I just stuffed the money into their trouser pockets. After that, I gave them 3,000 yuan every month.Don't tell me, they have been much more polite to me since I gave them money. They would also bring me midnight snacks when I came back in the evening. I don’t have to do this or that in the morning.
They stay with me when they have free time and even help with housework. It would never have been like this before. In the past, if they could ask me to do it, they would never do it themselves. Now, if they can help, they will try their best to help. I give them money every month, which can reduce their burden.
more importantly since doing this. We don't quarrel very much anymore. If we used to quarrel a lot, I couldn't stand them asking me to do this or that. I can't stand it, since I will quarrel with them. When we quarreled, everyone had a bad time, and sometimes my son would even cry because of this incident. My son is in a bind. My daughter-in-law said to me.
Then I got into an argument with my daughter-in-law. Sometimes there are things I don’t want to be like this, but I can’t control them. One side is his wife and the other side is his old father. How to choose? And it was my son who asked me to come here for retirement. That's why my son cried helplessly. Now that will never happen again, I gave them the money.
They treat me like a family member, especially when I give money to my daughter-in-law. My daughter-in-law used to have problems with me. I feel like I'm eating and drinking for free and I'm still verbose when I'm not willing to help do something. Things are different now. When I give them money, they treat me as family.
I think the money is well spent. It’s useless for me to keep so much money. I might as well use it to do more meaningful things, just like I am now. I hope that through my case, I can remind all the elderly.
What do you do with so much money? If you keep so much money, don’t you want to give it to them in the end? We have to give it to them sooner or later, so why can’t we give it to them in advance? What is mentioned here is that you only give a little bit every month, rather than asking you to take out all your money. If you take out all your money.
They are very likely to turn against you. If you give them a little every month, they will think about it2. They will treat you well, and this is a virtuous cycle. They treat you well, you are happy, and you can live the life you want. Isn't this great? And after you give them the money, it also reduces their burden. It's also a help to them.
Your money is of no use anyway, so you might as well use it to do more meaningful things and give it to them. Give a little every month. It doesn’t take a lot, just give a little. Just like me now, I give them 3,000 yuan a month. Hello, hello everyone, I won’t tell you this anymore, my child asked me to go fishing with him.
If it were normal, my children would not care about me at all. Now your family is in harmony, how are you? So many times there are gains and losses in many things. When giving birth to children and providing for old age, you should not be left with nothing. If you keep that money and don't plunk it out, you will definitely be the one regretting it later.
Conclusion:
This is indeed the truth. There is no use keeping money. Money is meaningful only when it is used. If it is money, you keep it yourself. Then money is just a series of numbers to you, and it is useless no matter how you use it. The old man in the article did not have a good life before, because he did not know how to give.
When you give money to your children, you will find that the children treat you as one of their own. If you don't give them money, 99.99% of the children will not treat you as a relative, but will only treat you as a meal. Because they think you will only cause them trouble here and eat and drink for free.
But if you give money, they will treat you well, and you will enjoy their kindness to you with peace of mind. I always feel weird if I don't give money, and I always feel like they have other agendas. And they may not necessarily treat you well.
It's different when you give money. You get what you pay for, that's how life is.It’s equivalent to saying that if you don’t give money to buy something, do you think people will give it to you? Definitely not. As long as you give money and consume, you are God and others will give you things. The same goes for your children. As long as you give them money, they will treat you well. do you understand?
