Author | Xu Jingdong;
Someone asked me: What is the difference between being sarcastic and pursuing perfection?
Let yourself go, you can let others go
In fact, this phenomenon is indeed very common in company management, husband and wife relationships, and people are not so patient with other people’s mistakes. Sarcastic and harshness are indeed related to each other. People who pursue perfection also have high requirements for themselves, but they are not satisfied with themselves, so they are also more mean to others. Therefore, all our cultivation is not aimed at others, but cultivate ourselves. Only when we are satisfied with ourselves and let ourselves go can we let others go. If we don’t let ourselves go, we cannot let others go.
When a person is harsh on himself, he will definitely be harsh on others. The key point is that the reason why he is harsh on himself is that he is dissatisfied with himself. This is a disease! Why are you so harsh on yourself? Why do you want to be so perfect? There must be some trauma during his growth process. These traumas make him feel that he is not good enough and he will definitely receive less praise and praise.
Take corporate management as an example
If we are very harsh on others, it is actually very sad for others to live. It is difficult to be truly motivated to do our work well, even if we do it well, we will not have a sense of accomplishment. Do you think a person is willing to work hard for you? Not at all, everyone wants their value to be recognized. If you don’t recognize him, criticize him sarcastically and deny him, do you think he will work hard? Can he do his job well? In order to keep his job, he may continue to work, but will he be happy in his process? Can an unhappy person do things well? This is a vicious cycle. You scold him and run away. The person you scolded him may be a potential talent. Maybe he has not become particularly satisfied with you yet, but he is a potential talent, and he is scolded by you.
How can we be a good leader? It is not that you expect to be recognized by employees and teams. It is unnecessary. The point is that you really have to appreciate them from the bottom of your heart. When their value is recognized, you will work hard for you, and the value contributed by their work is seen and appreciated, which creates a good atmosphere in a company or team.
is not perfect at all! Why still pursue perfection?
People who pursue perfection often pursue perfection for others and are also harsh on themselves. People who pursue perfection are actually very tired. Where does perfection come from? Nothing at all! But why do people pursue perfection? In fact, when pursuing perfection, it is to attack others from the outside, unwilling to appreciate other lives, and treat others with sarcastic words, with the purpose of escaping one's inner fear. Such people are insincere. The more they say they are not afraid of death, the more they are afraid of death in their hearts. When a person is in a body and mind, he will not speak. Action is better than words, just do it. Words are broken. When speaking, the heart is already different from what you say in your mouth, so don’t believe what others say, it depends on what others do.
Appreciate a perfect world
We look at it from more different angles and dimensions. In fact, this world is perfect. It has already presented its most perfect state, but you just haven't seen it. For every existence in the present, it has presented its best self, and this is perfection. But what is the standard of perfection? If you measure others by your own standards, it will be imperfect and you are not even satisfied with yourself.
How can we see a perfect world? Let go of the standards, let yourself go, let the world go, don’t ask, don’t judge, don’t measure with your standards, just look at it with appreciation, so that you will relax all of a sudden and the world you see will be perfect!
We are all passers-by in life, and every life is lovely! Why not appreciate it?
