Ten years ago, my marriage with Shulin ended, and my son Xiaofeng just turned 7 years old. My son and me, I became a single mother. As a PhD in psychology, I understand that not loving is the biggest reason, and I also know that a failed marriage will affect children.
In the face of a failed marriage, what I want to do most is to protect my son from harm or minimize the harm.
Since the day of divorce, I haven't shed a tear in front of my son. In addition to still loving my son as before, I began to force myself to cultivate a man's hobby. I want to be both a mother and a father, and through my own efforts, my son's growth will not be imperfect.
In front of my son, I have never said a bad thing about Shulin, and I have never blocked the meeting of their father and son one day a week. Every time Shulin does something for Xiaofeng, I will tell my son that his father is good. I want those innocent eyes and the young soul to realize that in the failed marriage of the parents, there is no hostility, only friendship. The love for Xiaofeng is complete together.
However, things have not progressed in the direction of my efforts. Back then, after Shulin divorced me, she quickly married Liya. After Xiaofeng went to school, because he came into contact with a few children from single-parent families, although they couldn't hate their parents, they all counted their sins on the "little three."
When meeting one day a week, Xiaofeng didn't show Liya a good face when he came to Shulin's house, and made trouble for her everywhere, which made Liya very embarrassed and Shulin also sad.
One day, Xiaofeng told me triumphantly: "Mom, with me, that person's life is not easy." For children under 8 years old, if they say such sinister things, they must It is a very dangerous logic to destroy other people's.
After thinking about it for a long time, I decided to find a new father for Xiaofeng. He needs the company of a man to grow up, and I can't handle this role.
When I started dating Guowen, Xiaofeng was extremely repulsive to him. He resorted to the same tricks and began to engage in all kinds of small actions, such as putting sand in the rice, salt in the tea... the Chinese language sees tricks and tricks. After a long time, I didn't expect them to slowly start a man-like relationship.
Once, when Xiaofeng cut the watermelon, he almost cut off his left index finger. Seeing the pain of his son,I screamed, but he reminded me: "Call 120 first, then call Uncle Guowen."
As a result, Guowen arrived earlier than 120. He calmly tied Xiaofeng's left wrist with a towel to stop the bleeding. Then he carried him downstairs and waited for the ambulance.
When Xiaofeng was pushed into the operating room, Guo Wen made a V-shaped gesture to him and said, "Boy, I didn't cry, it's good! When you are cured, I will be your father." Xiaofeng answered. Gave a gesture OK.
Seeing that they can easily cope with this situation, I have experienced the mode of communication between men, which I tried hard to give to my son but couldn't give it.
Later, Shulin and his wife also rushed to the hospital. Four adults surrounded a child. Xiaofeng enjoys this attention. I told myself that we must create all conditions to make my son proud and happy because he lives in a multi-parent family.
One and a half years after the divorce, I remarried. Together with Guowen, I invited Shulin and his wife to have a meal, but did not let my son Xiaofeng attend. We exchanged views on Xiaofeng’s education issues.
I sincerely apologized to Liya for his offense before Xiaofeng, I said to Liya: "That is a child's self-help, I hope you don't mind." Liya cried and said, "Of course I understand. He No matter how you do it, I won’t feel too much.”
I said, “I still have something to ask for, please be strict with Xiaofeng. If you treat yourself as your own, you can do whatever you want. Scold and scold. Believe me, as long as you really love him, he will become your flesh and blood, a sunny and sensible child. For this, I need your and your help."
Liya cried, book Lin also shed tears. Guowen came forward to ease the atmosphere: "It is better and better for one more person to love him than one less person to love him. Whether we are divorced or remarried, don't let our children really become single parents."
Xiaofeng’s parent meeting is held once a month, and the four of us take turns to participate. We all want to hear the evaluation of Xiaofeng from teachers and classmates, and to see his performance in school with our own eyes. More importantly, we hope that in this open and high-profile way, Xiaofeng can feel our full and eager attention to him and make our love for him public.
In an essay "My Dad",Xiaofeng wrote: "I have two dads. The former dad is a loving father who is responsive to me and is a recycle bin for my troubles. The latter dad is a strict father. He never pampers me because I am not born. An admirable dad."
Li Ya is an editor and has always been a great help to Xiaofeng in writing. Guowen is a policeman who always has strict requirements for Xiaofeng, especially in physical exercise, allowing him to receive high-intensity physical training since childhood. At least Shulin, try his best to be a good father, meet all the reasonable and unreasonable requirements of the child, so that the child can relax the pressure and restraint in his heart.
Two years later, the Shulin couple gave birth to a girl. Xiaofeng was very happy: "I have a little sister, and now I am a brother, I will play with my sister in the future."
It was 8 years in a flash. The two children grew up under the care of their four parents, and they have a good relationship. , Just like brothers and sisters. When the Shulin couple’s daughter was in elementary school, Xiaofeng was admitted to a prestigious university with a score of 24 points higher than the key undergraduate level. The day before the check-in, our two families sat down together for Xiaofeng. He bowed deeply to each of us, thanking him for such deep love.
.-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-