Tan Yankai and Song Mei-ling are both storied figures on the historical stage of the Republic of China in the 20th century.
The combination of Soong Mei-ling and Chiang Kai-shek is well known to the world, but few people know that before that, the man who almost entered the marriage hall with her was actually Tan Yan-kai, a strange man from the Republic of China.
Tan Yankai crossed the late Qing Dynasty and early Republic of China throughout his life. He was a famous politician, calligrapher, gourmet and poet. But what he talked about throughout his life was not these achievements, but his rejection of Soong Mei-ling and insisting on marrying only one wife in his life.
In the social environment where polygamy became popular at that time, it was very rare for Tan Yankai to never reconnect after his first wife's death, and this can be traced back to the influence of a special person on his lifelong life, and this person was his mother, Li. Tan Yankai was born during the Guangxu period. His father, Tan Zhonglin, was a prominent figure in the late Qing Dynasty. He served as the Governor of Guangdong and Guangxi, the Minister of Personnel and other important positions. Tan Zhonglin had many wives and concubines throughout his life. In addition to his original wife, Mrs. Chen, he also had four side rooms, including Mrs. Yan and Mrs. Li. Tan Yankai is the concubine son born to Mrs. Li.
There has always been a romantic statement about his birth. According to legend, on the evening of January 25, 1880, the night when Tan Yankai was born, his father Tan Zhonglin dreamed that the late Qing minister He Linghan came to pay his respects, and suddenly woke up from his dream and heard the cry of a baby coming from his home. Then a servant told the good news that Li gave birth to a son, and this son was Tan Yankai.
In this way, Tan Zhonglin was very happy to believe that his son was the reincarnation of Tanhua He Linghan. He Linghan was posthumously named "Wen'an", and Tan Zhonglin gave his son the name "Zu'an".
Maybe this dream is indeed a kind of foresight in the dark. Tan Yankai has been smart and talented since childhood. He entered the school to receive the classics at the age of 7 and studied art and literature at the age of 11. Emperor Guangxu's master and top scholar, Weng Tonghe, , met his poems and essays and called him a "wizard".
Tan Yankai was favored by his father, but her mother, Li, did not change the fate of her side room.
Li came from a poor family. Because of her beautiful appearance, she was taken as a maid by the Tan family. She served in Mrs. Tan's room in her early years. It was only because he was accidentally attracted by Tan Zhonglin and was favored and gave birth to the son of Tan Yankai, so he was taken as a concubine.
After giving birth to a son, Li was no longer a servant in the Tan family, but her status was only a little higher than that of the servant.
In the feudal ethics in the past, not only did women as family members have different status, but even the children they gave birth to were divided into legitimate and illegitimate. For example: if you have a meal on weekdays, your wife can sit down, but your concubine can only eat standing up. If you have no children, you can only eat in a miscellaneous hall.
Therefore, every time the whole family eats, Li can only stand by the table to add vegetables and food to others. She can only eat by herself until all these services are done, and she still can't sit down. Later, Li gave birth to two sons for her husband one after another, but this situation still did not change and lasted for 24 years.
Usually the mother is from a humble background, and the son will also be looked down upon. As a concubine's son, Tan Yankai has always been called the "three youngest" by his family. When he was young, he didn't know what the nickname meant, so he ran to ask his mother.
Li was crying and silent after hearing this. After his son's repeated requests, he could only say with tears in his eyes: "Son! I am the concubine taken by your father. The child born to the concubine is called "女子". "女子" means looking down on the meaning of "女子". "
After hearing this, Tan Yankai remembered that his mother could not eat with her family at the same table and could only serve carefully, and was very angry.
Mother comforted him and said, "You brothers must study hard, be a good person, do great things in the future, and be a big man, which is considered to be a glory. Then I feel comforted even though I endure hardships in the Tan family."
These words deeply hurt Tan Yankai's heart. From then on, he vowed to study hard and make a name for himself one day.
Tan Yankai did what he said. He passed the scholar at the age of 13 and passed the imperial examination again at the age of 22. At the age of 24, he won the Huiyuan Award in one fell swoop in the national unified examination.
This is a very remarkable thing.Looking back 200 years, Tan Yankai's hometown of Hunan has produced the No. 1 pick, No. 2 pick, and Tanhua, but he has never produced the Huiyuan (first place in the imperial examination), and Tan Yankai filled this gap.
Because Tan Yankai was young and honored, he shined the Tan family's family. Tan Zhonglin, who has always paid attention to patriarchal etiquette, made an exception and announced to the whole family: "Mrs. Li can go to the main hall to sit and have a meal."
Li finally "mother is noble by her son", but this is still difficult to smooth out the psychological shadow caused by the strict feudal etiquette on Tan Yankai, which makes him more sympathetic and filial to his mother.
Tan Yankai is famous for his filial piety to his mother. Every time he had a meal, he would sit next to his mother to pick up food for him; on weekdays, he would greet his mother early and evening, never stop.
He even tried every means to improve his mother's status and prestige. For example, when he was funding the Mingde School in Changsha, Tan Yankai claimed to be on the order of the Grandmaster; during his administration in Hunan, the banner he put forward was "to be ordered by his mother to maintain order" and "to avoid local corruption."
In Tan Yankai's view, without the forbearance and education of his mother, he would not have the success he had today.
When getting married, Tan Yankai instructed his wife Fang Rongqing, hoping that she could take good care of her mother while she was struggling outside and let her enjoy her youth.
The gentle and virtuous Fang Rongqing did not disappoint Tan Yanqi at all. She not only serves her mother-in-law wholeheartedly, but also is considerate and caring to her husband, and fully supports Tan Yankai's study and politics, which touched Tan Yankai very much. The couple respected and loved each other, and had extremely affectionate love, and they also gave birth to two men and four women.
It’s a pity that the good times didn’t last long. In 1916, Tan’s mother, Li, was seriously ill. At that time, Tan Yankai was working in Changsha, and the situation was turbulent. Fang Rongqing did not dare to tell her husband the news. She just served her mother-in-law day and night in a filial manner, but her mother-in-law was seriously ill and died. After the news reached Changsha, Tan Yankai was deeply saddened and rushed to Shanghai to attend the funeral. At that time, Tan Yankai was in the second time in Hunan, and the political situation was in turmoil. If you leave rashly, the Hunan Governor's "throne" may be gained and lost at any time, but Tan Yankai is still determined to leave.
Thinking of his mother's low and young life, and having suffered so much grievances, Tan Yankai was determined to hold a glorious funeral for her mother. But secular etiquette and law quickly poured a basin of cold water on him.
On the day of Li's funeral, something extremely unpleasant happened. It turns out that Tan’s house is located behind the Tan clan temple, and the funeral of the coffin must be passed through the clan temple. However, according to the clan rules, the concubine cannot be funeral from the clan temple gate after death.
Therefore, the tribe members present urged Tan Yankai not to break the tribe rules and just lift his mother's coffin out of the small door. Some people deliberately blocked the way at the gate.
It turns out that being a concubine for one day and a concubine for life will never be treated equally until death! Thinking of this cannibalistic feudal ethics, and thinking that he was fame and fortune, but he could not get his mother's treatment as the governor of Hunan, Tan Yankai was angry and lay on the lid of the coffin and shouted: "I, Tan Yankai, are dead, carry me to the funeral!" Seeing this, the tribesmen looked at each other in silence, and had to give way and let the carriage carry the coffin and go to the gate of the clan temple...
's sad experience in his mother's life made Tan Yankai unforgettable from his youth to being a husband. It is precisely because he is at the core of this tragedy of and that he does not want to cause such a tragedy as his mother in his family, so Tan Yankai vows not to take a concubine.
In June 1918, shortly after Tan Yankai's mother passed away, his wife Fang Rongqing also fell seriously ill. At that time, Tan Yankai was ordered by Mr. Sun Yat-sen to participate in the " Protection Movement " and supervised the army in Lingling, Hunan.
Fang Rongqing, who was very wise, concealed his illness in order not to distract her husband's energy. He unfortunately died of illness in Shanghai shortly afterwards at the age of 38. The family members dare not tell Tan Yankai about this misfortune because they knew that the couple had a deep relationship and were afraid that Tan Yankai would affect military affairs in his grief.
In 1920, Tan Yankai was forced to be dismissed and returned to Shanghai because of the third failure to supervise Hunan. When Mrs. Fang's coffin was transported to Changsha for burial, two ships met in Dongting Lake.
The person who accompanied him was worried about Tan Yankai's injury and was so sad that he dared not tell the truth. He only made an excuse to say that his acquaintance was parked and he was hanging alone after passing the boat.
Tan Yankai learned the truth only after he arrived in Shanghai, which is what he thought was the most heartbreaking thing in his life. In order to mourn his poor deceased wife, he has always paid attention to food and ate vegetables for a hundred days in the army, which shows how deep his affection is. When Mrs. Fang passed away, Tan Yankai was only 40 years old and was in middle age. In addition to her great reputation, there were many famous and talented women who were interested in him. There were countless friends who advised him to re-stand, but Tan Yankai was unmoved.
When he was in the important position in the Grand Marshal's Office of Guangzhou, Sun Yat-sen valued his loyalty and made contributions to the revolution. He once personally served as a mediator and introduced his aunt Soong Mei-ling, who had just returned from studying in the United States. Although Tan Yankai was widowed, the Song family believed that he had a good character and was optimistic about his future, and agreed with this marriage very much.
But Tan Yankai himself was restless and in a dilemma. If you disagree, it will disappoint Mr. Sun Yat-sen's kindness and offend Song family . But if you agree, how can you be worthy of your beloved deceased wife in the Nine Springs? Thinking of his mother hating polygamy throughout her life, Tan Yankai felt even more painful.
After repeated thinking day and night, Tan Yankai chose a sunny day and specially prepared the next generous gift to the Song family. As soon as he entered the door, Old Mrs. Song happened to come out to receive her. Tan Yankai knocked three times to Old Mrs. Song and shouted "Godmother".
This surprised Old Lady Song very much, but she realized that she had such an "godson" and she was so happy again. She quickly helped him up and asked Soong Mei-ling to come out to meet.
Then, Tan Yankai took the initiative to recognize Soong Mei-ling as his godsister. After Soong Mei-ling guessed Tan Yan-kai's intention to come, she was not angry, but was moved, and since then she respected her character even more. When Mr. Sun Yat-sen learned about this later, he finally couldn't say anything else.
On September 22, 1930, 50-year-old Tan Yankai died of a sudden cerebral hemorrhage in Nanjing. A few months ago, he was plagued by illness and wrote a memorial poem for his deceased wife to commemorate their 36th year of marriage. And this year it has been 12 years since Mrs. Fang’s death. His poem says:
"The flowers are flying, willows are sunny, and the scenery is bright and in front of you. It's a pity for people to leave, but love is still hard to donate when you are old. Who is drunk when you are forever? Sitting on the flowing waves and feeling the passing rivers. Thirty-six years are easy to pass, and you should not change your life and be confused."
words between the lines, are you not my deep affection and nostalgia for your wife.
Although Tan Yankai was born in the feudal era, looking at his life, whether it was his filial piety to his mother as always or his unchanged love for his wife, he reflected his determination and courage to fight feudal ethics.
It can be said that Tan Yankai is completely a man who transcends the limitations of society and the times in his thoughts, which is amazing.
END.
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