text | Shentan
"Thirty Only" is currently on the air recently, and a Hermes battle in the drama is popular all over the Internet. Gu Jia's adventures in the circle of wives put the anxiety of parenting, class promotion, and gender identity in people's daily lives at the top, making the audience feel that they are both personal and curious. This is the first time on the domestic screen.
"Thirty Only" The process of buying platinum bag in the drama "I am a mother, I need a platinum bag - a Upper East Side Parenting War with a PhD in Anthropology" (hereinafter referred to as "Platinum Bag"). "Platinum Bag" is a best-selling book released in 2018. Through his own personal experience, the author Winnisti Martin vividly depicts the parenting war in another "magic city" New York (Upper East Side).
articles about "Thirty Only" have been written in succession. Many articles also mention the book "Platinum Bag" which is borrowed from by the TV series. However, few people mentioned what the war between the Upper East Side of New York was like? In a nutshell, compared to the social circles of Shanghai wives, the hardships of buying bags and houses, and the anxiety of raising children, the celebrities in the Upper East Side of New York are even better than that. It is said that Chinese mothers who wrote "The Battle Song of Tiger Mom" also highly praised this book, and may be because they appreciate each other.
It can be said that "Platinum Bag" is completely a cool article - the author claims to be a literary young man from the Upper West District, and was forced to become a socialite in the Upper East District for his children. As you might expect, this Mary Sue was isolated and strangled by the mothers of the Upper East Side of New York at the beginning. Unfortunately, the most powerful father in the Upper East Side was very fond of her. Since then, she has turned around and not only entered the social circle of the famous socialite, but also became more and more courageous, exercising, plastic surgery, buying platinum bags, and running into the life victory group.
1. You cannot get a loan when buying a school district house. Current assets are up to 10 times the house price
Like Gu Jia, the story of Martin, a celebrity in the Upper East District, started with buying a school district house.
However, Gu Jia only requires one asset to buy a house in Pudong, Shanghai, where every inch of land is valuable, but it is much more complicated to buy a school district house in the Upper East District of New York.
Following the world's prestigious Central Park to the north and east, the Upper East Side of New York, gathering wealthy people from finance and investment banks, even the air is filled with the smell of money. Here, money is of course necessary, but connections and resources are more critical. However, these giants and artists in the industry are the parents in the circle, and this competition naturally becomes their own cute game.
In the general impression, buying a house is only possible with one agency. But in the Upper East Side, real estate agents are subdivided into seller agents and buyer agents. If the buyer directly seeks a seller's agency to view the house, the seller's agency usually uses "no house" as an excuse to pass it. The buyer must hire a buyer's agent as his assistant to contact the seller's agent before he can be allowed to view the house.
In this process, buyers also need to deal with the intermediary's survey on their own net worth (Jewish genealogy survey). After the first exchange, the author equipped himself with "Upper East District House Viewing Robe, dignified tight skirt, paired with Yanisby or French Sole flat shoes, plus my most ladylike leather bag", which passed the "identity authentication".
This is just the first step. The school district housing required by top nurseries, the so-called "high-end real estate projects", cannot be borrowed in addition to having to pay a huge down payment. people who want to buy must prove that their current assets are at least 3 to 5 times or even 10 times the house price.
In addition to such asset requirements, the seller may also make other requirements based on your identity, because such apartments are basically private clubs, and the resident management committee has its own rules and only those who are willing to abide by them can live there.
Finally, Martin was lucky enough to find a suitable house. All kinds of applications fully meet the requirements, but there was still the last check waiting for her - the interview with the Household Committee.
The author described the home purchase application process as the most humiliating entry ceremony she has ever encountered."Suddenly I understood that Manhattan is based on this method to establish a class system so that everyone can stay where they should be."
2. Top nursery: Interpersonal relationships built on children
In the drama "Thirty Only", Gu Jia bought a school district house, which was just the beginning of competing for the degree from a top nursery. The decisive role was the recommendation of a real-powered person like Mrs. Wang.
Martin's child finally entered his favorite nursery, which was also based on the recommendation of his sister-in-law. Because my sister-in-law "had successfully sent the children in, and gave them four, and donated a lot of money."
In the drama "Thirty Only", Gu Jia's original intention of sending her child to a top nursery is to allow her child to receive the best education. It can be said that getting to know Mrs. Wang and getting into the circle of wife can be said to be following the trend.
But "Platinum Bag" tells you that the purpose of New York's Upper East Side wives is very clear, and they must form the most important interpersonal relationship through their children's private schools.
"All the women around me, whether they are intermediaries with children, owners of houses I see, or friends of friends in the Upper East District, they talk about every day, which school their children go to. They will introduce themselves with their children's age and school name."
"In the Upper East District, children's friends and playmates can determine your class, your class will go to a higher level, or you will be dragged down. What kind of playmates do you help your children find, you are the social class. If your status is low, your innocent and cute children will also have a low status."
In the social life of the Upper East District, children and mothers, just like the concubines and princes in palace dramas, are a symbiotic relationship that prospers and loses together.
In order to integrate into this social circle, Gu Jia and Martin both have to buy platinum bags.
3. Without platinum bags, there is no
In February this year, Rally Road split the above Bordeaux crocodile leather platinum bag into 2,000 shares. The 270 investors spent an average of US$175 each to buy 6.67 shares, becoming its "cloud master".
Gu Jia bought Hermes platinum bag because her wives had it, but she didn't. The origin of Martin's intention to buy platinum bags is quite dramatic.
At that time, she was walking on the street with a plastic bag, and the woman carrying Hermes platinum bag deliberately hit her left arm with the bag. And the lady "then she laughed—that kind of smug smile!", "I can't see you because you don't exist at all."
Martin tells us that Manhattan is a place with distinct classes, and what you have is telling others which class you belong to, and how much wealth, connections and strength you have. On the contrary, if you miss any of the school district housing, the degree from the top nursery, the platinum bag, you are not considered a member of this class.
is the first to be affected, you will lose your connections. If you don’t have connections, your child will not be able to enter top nurseries, and “nurses will affect which university your child will go to in the future.”
Because applying for Ivy requires a letter of recommendation, it requires a previous shining experience of social activities. And these are just provided by powerful parents in the social circle. As I said before, this competition naturally became their own cute game. At this point, uses degree identification to identify identity and strive for a degree through identity, and class solidification forms a perfect closed loop.
Therefore, Martin lamented that "The inability to send children to a noble school is as terrifying as being caught by predators at the top of the food chain. For us, not being able to enter a good school is equivalent to being eaten by a jaguar."
yes, if you don't go to a noble school, it will be "disappeared" again, just like there is no platinum bag.
Such an interlocking life is anxiety-provoking, and Martin does not hide his helplessness and disgust. Reputable is that her reflection is not limited to her own life difficulties.She was sensitively aware that such as the harsh admission conditions, the children's journey of climbing the ivy from the age of 4, and the tight social circle of noble ladies is the way for the top rich people in Manhattan to continue their class traits and resist the attacks of outsiders.
After all, this is to maintain privileges with privileges.
4. Female-style parenting reminds you: "You are really not elegant enough when you sharpen your head."
Putting aside the buying of a house and connections, there is another keyword in "Platinum Bag": "Famous-style parenting". To sum up, the celebrity-style parenting does not show off the high-end custom-made children's clothing, the daily care of servants, and a birthday party created with a lot of money. It teases you with another elegant and self-pride way - such as taste, education, vision, innocence and simplicity of not knowing the sufferings of the world, and beautiful scenery that is rarely visited.
There is a detail in "Platinum Bag" that children in the Upper East Side must receive the "correct" music education at the age of two or three. However, the "correct" education needed in the Upper East District, like the "Russian doll", seems to be extremely high. As a mother, , if my child cannot have these things at birth, then how many barriers he needs to climb, how much youth he put in, and how many eyes he encounters, can he see the beautiful secret realms that only a few people can reach? Even if he arrived by chance, as his mother, how can I get along with myself in his social circle?
If I become a famous mother in the Upper East District, will I give my children the "correct" music education? I hope that the children can enlighten their minds and get happiness in music? Do I allow my kids to listen to black music in the neighborhood next door? If my child is really addicted to music, will I allow my child to cut off social interaction and make every effort to be a lawyer, doctor, or financier, and spend his days on music?
Or is it the so-called socialite style parenting in , just to hope that children can efficiently master superb performance techniques, can decently comment on the orchestra performance of the New Year concert, and make music another gorgeous tail feather on children?
socialite parenting brings me not the anxiety of " chicken ", but another kind of self-harm and self-blame. It is the anxiety of Madame Bovary, which is the best thing that cannot be given to the child. "Chicken Baby" may be able to achieve its goal through hard work, but the anxiety brought by celebrity-style parenting is an unchangeable starting point, and it is the so-called trait passed down from generation to generation that only the top level possesses.
socialite parenting, constantly reminding you: socialite children are people who win at the starting line, and ordinary families cannot catch up no matter how hard they try; the class characteristics of the upper class are influenced by family education, and ordinary families cannot teach them even if they sell their money.
You don’t believe it, are you trying to climb? You are not elegant enough for a sharp head like this.
5. Conclusion: Integrate or leave?
After reading "Platinum Bag", I found that we cannot blame the grand social problems like "class solidification" on individuals. But we can completely imagine how loyally a mother who is struggling in the parenting war will implement the entire set of self-disciplines in the upper class into every daily life of her and her children's growth.
Martin attempts to analyze the special attributes of women in the Upper East Side from an anthropological perspective.
In Chapter 6 "The Manhattan Mom Who Losts the Soul", Martin wrote: In a culture that values honor and shame, in a world where you cannot have cellulite and no hair can be messed up, in a world where you are depends on how much money you donated at the banquet, how clean your home is organized, and whether your children have no problems at all, it is too easy to be embarrassed... I found that many people's lives, their happiness and happiness, and the value of their existence, rely on people and things that they cannot control at all.
In fact, when children, packages, bodies, appearances, everything becomes the identifier of class attributes, you are an object that is always stared at, and both materialization and self-materialization are inevitable.
At the end of "Platinum Bag", Martin left the Upper East Side.And where Gu Jia goes, it all depends on the creator's ambition.
