"Who do you think you are and what's so great about you"
This is the first sentence in a suicide note left by a father after he committed suicide by jumping into a river.
On March 26, 2007,
Yang Qinji did not hesitate to sell his kidneys and houses in order to support his daughter's pursuit of stars Andy Lau ,
and finally died with hatred on this day.
And his daughter Yang Lijuan has been crazy about pursuing Andy Lau for 13 years,
also came to an end on this day.
Her father's suicide brought her endless pain and regret.
But in the past thirteen years, the harm she had caused to her father was far more profound than at this moment.
As soon as this matter became fermented,
even Andy Lau was overwhelmed by public opinion.
What made netizens feel the strangest is,
Why is Yang Lijuan so crazy about Andy Lau?
What kind of bizarre past does she have behind her madness?
Speaking of Yang Lijuan’s pursuit of stars,
everyone’s first reaction is that this woman is mentally abnormal.
There are many fans who are crazy about chasing stars.
But she is definitely at the ceiling level.
As for the source of her mental problems,
in fact There were signs as early as her parents' generation.
Yang Lijuan's mother was named Tao Juying.
She was a temporary worker for school decoration.
Her family was poor and her six children all dropped out of school early to work.
It was at this time that
Tao Juying met Yang Qinji, who was 14 years older than her.
Yang Qinji was very kind to her,
often found excuses to come over to help her,
Tao Juying also liked her a little bit,
but the age difference between the two always stood in the way,
it was neither for her to advance nor for her to retreat.
This incident became a hurdle in her heart. Even after the two got married,
every time she went out, people would smile and ask her: "Is this your dad?"
Tao Juying kept feeling suffocated in her heart.
Everyone she meets tells her that she has never liked her husband,
he is too old.
But in fact, at that time,
except Yang Qinji, no one liked this girl from a poor family.
Even Tao Juying's parents advised her:
"That man is an honest child, and his family is full of intellectuals. If you follow him, you will have a good relationship." The future. "
There was just something that her father hid from her,
because it was too shocking.
In Lanzhou in the 1950s, a sensational thing happened.
It is said that Yang Qinji's younger brother had a good girlfriend at that time.
When he was having dinner at home, his mother's words stimulated him.
"Look at your brother who is so old and still doesn't have a partner.
You are still young. It would be great if you could just give your girlfriend to your brother."
So his girlfriend broke up with him, and Yang Qinji's brother went insane.
swung a knife Stabbed his mother.
After his younger brother was arrested, he was diagnosed with mental illness.
The theory that Yang Qinji had a genetic history of mental illness in his family also spread from that time.
At this time, Tao Juying did not know that
a similar disaster would befall them in the near future.
In 1978, the birth of Yang Lijuan brought joy to the whole family.
Tao Juying no longer focused on regrets,
but focused on taking care of her daughter.
Yang Qinji had a son in old age, and regarded Yang Lijuan as the apple of his eye,
Yang Qinji, a teacher, brought his family to Lanzhou in 1981 in order to give his daughter a better future.
Yang Lijuan's grades were very good when she was a child.
She was always praised by her teachers.
She also earned a lot of face in the eyes of her parents.
She just indulged in caring since she was a child.
She began to become more and more unruly and willful.
In class None of her classmates like her and often isolate her, but sometimes in order to copy her homework,
will pretend to be flattery and say nice things.
This morbid environment made Yang Lijuan's heart very empty.
Her parents doted on her, and her classmates were indifferent to her.
Yang Lijuan did not feel needed.
Yang Lijuan began to hate school from the second grade of junior high school.
Her grades were still very good,
but she couldn't bear the alienation of her classmates.
She begged her father to drop out of school and wait until she was in high school to change schools.
This kind of request is worthy of a beating in the eyes of normal parents,
but Yang Qinji agreed.
But he never imagined that
one compromise would lead to countless compromises,
until the whole family fell into an abyss from which they could not extricate themselves.
After entering high school, the classmates have become sensible.
There is no such childish thing as isolating friends.
Everyone has their own hobbies.
The male students like to play basketball and pull girls' pigtails.
And the female students Then began to chase stars,
some people like Aaron Kwok , some people like Dawn ,
some people like Andy Lau,
the stationery box is covered with photo stickers of various stars.
Yang Lijuan is not interested in these,
The hole in her heart has never been filled.
Until 1994, she had a strange dream.
She dreamed of a painting, which showed a handsome man with short hair and sharp edges.
That face seemed familiar, as if he was there Saw it.
The man in the painting looks at her affectionately, with a sentence written on the left and right sides.
"You came so close to me, and you met me truly."
In an instant, Yang Lijuan woke up from her dream, holding her chest,
feeling that the hole was being filled by some unknown emotion,
She put this Feeling is called love.
The next day, Yang Lijuan told her father about the incident.
Generally speaking, no one would care about such a ridiculous dream.
Yang Qinji looked at her daughter's smart eyes and
felt that this dream seemed to be extraordinary to her.
In order to Agreeing with his daughter's words, Yang Qinji made up a lie.
"What a coincidence, I dreamed about it too. It seems that your dream is probably true."
Yang Lijuan was very excited by her father's approval.
The man in her dream only seemed familiar to her and she didn't know where to look.
Until she returned to school, she saw Andy Lau's photo on her classmate's pencil case.
At this time, she was extremely excited.
It turned out that Andy Lau was her dream lover.
In 1992, Andy Lau, Ming Lai, Aaron Kwok, Jacky Cheung were promoted as the Four Queens,
became very popular, and the four people became the dream lovers of countless girls.
At that time, many classmates kept saying that they would marry Andy Lau in the future ,
But everyone knows in his heart that this is just a kind of rhetoric,
is just like the current fans calling their idols "husband" and "wife".
It's just that Yang Lijuan seems different.
She really regards Andy Lau as her husband,
so much so that when her classmates say that she wants to marry Andy Lau, she will immediately step forward and yell.
"You are talking nonsense, Andy Lau will not marry you, he will only marry me."
The classmate looked at her strangely, and did not take it seriously. He just said perfunctorily:
"Okay, okay, marry you, just marry you." "What's so bad?"
This perfunctory sentence became Yang Lijuan's favorite words during her crazy years.
She frantically bought posters about Andy Lau.
The walls at home were covered with photos.
She knew every song by Andy Lau by heart.
Andy Lau's album was even enshrined in her home like a treasure,
I have to take it out for observation every day, and then put it back carefully.
Gradually, she was no longer satisfied with chasing stars.
She wanted to meet Andy Lau and tell him she loved him in person.
In such a state, her academic performance naturally plummeted.
Her parents saw it in their eyes and were anxious in their hearts.
At this time, Yang Qinji suddenly became obsessed.
He actually came up with a way that normal people would not think of.
He wants to support his daughter and fulfill her daughter's dream of meeting Andy Lau,
so that her daughter can return to normal.
I have to say that Yang Lijuan’s madness is inseparable from her father’s support.
But at this time, almost all the money in the family was used by Yang Lijuan to buy albums and posters.
So Yang Qinji gritted his teeth and borrowed more than 10,000 yuan from loan sharks.
He took Yang Lijuan to Beijing by train and signed up for a trip to Hong Kong. In this way, the
family embarked on a journey to find Andy Lau.
It's just that when they arrived in Hong Kong, Andy Lau was nowhere to be seen.
Only some posters were left at the venues where Andy had performed.
Everything told them that they had missed time.
Several people can only go home disappointed.
In 2003, Yang Lijuan's parents sold their house.
The family lived in a rental house that cost 400 yuan a month.
All the money was used to support her daughter's pursuit of stars.
In 2004, Yang Lijuan learned that Andy Lau was filming the movie "A World Without Thieves " in Gansu.
This was the moment when she felt closest to the lover of her dreams.
She stood on the roof and looked in the direction of the crew,
her heart surged. Come up with countless crazy ideas.
In 2005, some Hong Kong media exposed Andy Lau's address.
Yang Lijuan immediately rushed to Hong Kong with her father after learning about it.
But there was only one address for Andy Lau.
Several people went around in circles, and the visas all expired.
So he even Tao Juying, who broke her leg in an accident, could only live a life of begging on the streets of Hong Kong with her father and daughter.
was eventually deported.
In 2006, Yang Lijuan's family was already destitute.
At this time, Yang Qinji decided to use the power of the media.
"I can still live after selling one kidney. The money from selling the kidney can be given to my daughter so that she can find Andy Lau."
After this sentence was exposed by the media, Andy Lau immediately fell into public opinion.
Andy Lau also felt about this Surprised and angry, she said bluntly to reporters:
"If you use the money your parents sell their kidneys to chase stars, that would be disloyal and unfilial."
Perhaps she was afraid that Andy Lau would hate her, so Yang Lijuan thought for a while and persuaded her father.
"Selling a kidney is too dangerous, so let's take out a loan."
With the help of the media and good people, Yang Lijuan's family raised some money,
and in 2007 they got their wish and met the woman of their dreams.
At Andy Lau's fan meeting, Yang Lijuan stood side by side with her idol,
smiling like a child. At this time, her mind went blank,
she had no idea what to say,
but just when she was organizing her words , the fans behind
swarmed up and squeezed her out of Andy Lau's side.
This made Yang Lijuan very upset. She almost
could tell him what was in her heart.
Yang Qinji's father also appealed to Andy Lau through reporters,
hoping to see his daughter alone.
However, this request was rejected by Andy Lau.
So in the early morning of the next day,
Yang Qinji left a seven-page suicide note and committed suicide by jumping into the river.
The moment they saw Yang Qinji's body, the mother and daughter burst into tears,
especially Yang Lijuan. Now that her father was gone,
she realized how stupid she was.
The love for Andy Lau also turned into deep hatred,
He even scolded Andy Lau in public many times.
However, what she didn't know was that
Andy Lau quietly helped them pay off the loan sharks they borrowed.
Since then, Yang Lijuan has disappeared.
lives with her mother in a cheap rental house, with a rent of only a few hundred yuan a year.
Every year she would kneel in front of her father's grave to repent,
but other than sorry and silence, she could not say anything else.
The past mistakes were too heavy.
Now Yang Lijuan is 44 years old and works as a tally clerk in a supermarket.
She earns a monthly salary of more than 2,000.
But the shadow of the past has always shrouded her.
She never goes to KTV and dares not listen to music.
Whenever I see an advertisement about Andy Lau on the roadside, I lower my head and leave in a hurry.
The only good thing is that she started working and began to take care of her disabled mother.
Maybe this responsibility came too late, it is better than being immersed in grief forever.
Regarding Andy Lau, some netizens felt that his initial handling was too cold-blooded. If
agreed to meet alone, perhaps such a tragedy would not have happened.
In fact, the compromise with Yang Lijuan started with her father Yang Qinji.
If you continue to compromise all the way, you will eventually have to reap the consequences.
Appropriate restraint can form the habit of self-discipline.
Yang Lijuan is sorry for her father, but Yang Qinji's approach also lacks a lot.
