When you feel stressed, many distorted thoughts will automatically pop up in your mind, "It won't change anything if I say it anyway", "It's useless if I do it".
Do you know why you love to be angry with yourself?
Do you know what distorted cognitions you have?
#黑与白#
I remember that in the early stages of my depression , my family said that the world is not as black and white as the science I studied. In fact, I am very confused. Why is my understanding so black and white? Is this my perception? The authorities are obsessed.
In fact, when your inner pain increases, the psychological space will also disappear. You will have an overly persistent idea, tend to judge yourself and others with extreme black and white standards, and cannot accept the differences between things. There are gray areas.
Behind this distorted cognition is perfectionism. It makes you reject any imperfections and mistakes, and it will also make your sense of self-worth disappear.
#Correction method#
You can ask and answer yourself: "Are there really perfect things in this world?" In fact, my feeling is that it's not that I don't understand that there are no perfect things in this world, but that I hope to achieve it in everything I do. The result I wanted. If I fail an exam due to non-strength factors, I will feel extremely painful. This is my "perfectionism". What to do with
? We can tell ourselves that although reality is still far from our desired goals, we are getting closer step by step in a down-to-earth manner. As long as we complete what we need to do one by one, the degree of completion will steadily improve.
#以 partial generalization#
When you are in intense pain and darkness, a failure experience will make you feel that your future is dark. You will feel that you are "unlucky in this life" and "nothing goes well". I feel this very deeply. Looking back at the failures that bothered me in the past, I felt that many things were beyond my control. In the past, I was lonely, helpless, confused, so weak and immature, and I had to bear too much in my heart. Some people and things that affect the trajectory of my life are beyond my control. When I think about it this way, I feel that I am very unfortunate, and perhaps misfortune will become a cycle. It's like a boy confessing, but the girl refuses. The boy feels that his confession will never be successful in this life.
#Correction method#
In fact, if we summarize it, we will understand that the same thing will only appear a few times in your life, so there is no need to blind yourself to it. Of course, if you miss some people and some opportunities, you miss them. But we should not dwell on the past and embrace the future. Never give yourself bad psychological hints. I remember that when I was in junior high school, I was among the best in my grades. But on the day of the high school entrance examination, I felt uncomfortable and dizzy for no reason. After that, my grades were about fifty points lower than usual, although I was still in the best class in high school. , but it has a psychological shadow. No one comforted me or encouraged me. My mother said that it must be because I didn’t work hard that I fell behind at the critical moment.
My grades in high school were also among the best, so it was not a problem to pass the Qingbei test. But on the day of the college entrance examination, I felt the evil again on the day of the high school entrance examination, and I also failed the college entrance examination. Is it because I don’t study seriously? I dare not blame fate, it seems irresponsible. I can only blame myself and some bad habits.
Now I feel that it is useless to blame myself or fate. We should focus on the present and the future. The next important exam, I must tell myself: This is just a test. Maybe the score can determine your future, but you have to believe that even if you fail the exam, you still have a way out. Will you commit suicide if you fail in the exam? I’m not afraid of death, so what else should I be afraid of!
#心 filter#
Depressed people have a pair of colored glasses, and all self-evaluations will become negative after passing through these glasses. For example, if a depressed student finds out that one of his friends has done something wrong, he will think that there is something wrong with his view on choosing friends.
#Correction Method#
Consciously avoid these negative thoughts from entering your mind. Believe that the world is three-dimensional and diverse, with both negative and positive sides.
For example, if you see some people working for capitalists and being exploited for their surplus value, don’t think that the world is not beautiful because of this. The beauty of the world cannot be buried by these phenomena. If you really want to change this phenomenon, you must have faith, read Marx and Engels, and take some action. Do you know what your worst habit is? That is, before every action, you should ask yourself whether it makes sense to do so. If it is difficult to do so, don't do it.
If you want to improve your memory and concentration, don't go after the most useful solution. If you want to cure a disease, don't ask the doctor to be the best doctor. People who think too much and don't do it are actually stupid. I've been this way too, but I'm correcting it. If you pursue so many things, you will get tired.
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