1. Doctor: "Don't be nervous about Yang Ming, this is just a minor operation." Patient: "Huh? Doctor, my name is not Yang Ming." Doctor: "I know, my name is Yang Ming." 2. I don't understand why Sunday is so close to Monday, but Monday is so far away from Sunday, which is unscien

1. Doctor: "Don't be nervous about Yang Ming, this is just a minor operation." Patient: "Huh? Doctor, my name is not Yang Ming." Doctor: "I know, my name is Yang Ming."

2. I don't understand why Sunday is so close to Monday, but Monday is so far away from Sunday, which is unscientific! ! !

3. If I have anything that you don’t like, please overcome it yourself.

4. When I was at the peak of my appearance, I had more than 500 comments on a photo and more than 300 people wanted to get along with me, but happiness was always short-lived, and I was quickly revealed to be a stolen picture.

5. Please, can you scold me by name when you scold me in the future? I have done too many bad things and I feel that I am scolding me when I see it.

6. That afternoon, I met an old man walking on the road. He was carrying a bag of things and looked very fierce. I wanted to go forward to help, but casually said, "Old thing, I will help you with it!

7. After dinner, Lao Wang stood on the electronic scale and put his stomach away with force. Mrs. Wang on the side couldn't help but complain: "Do you think that putting your stomach away will make your weight lighter? "Old Wang shook his head: "I'm not stupid, of course I won't lose weight. "Mrs. Wang was puzzled: "Then why do you still have to tighten your stomach? "Lao Wang: "If I don't put my stomach away, I won't see how many kilograms the screen shows. "

8. Why don't I give you the first cup of milk tea in winter? Are you so fat that I dare not speak, or have you broken up in winter?

9. In fact, learning to swim is very simple. First of all, you should not be afraid of flooding. When you are about to sink, relax and breathe, and it will naturally float in a few days.

10. The word "Fu" during the New Year must be posted upside down, so why not directly produce the reversed "Fu" ?

11. In class, the music teacher asked the whole class: "What is the next sentence that is all bubbles? " Xiao Ming stood up and shouted, "The next sentence should be, will you pour wine? ”

12. When I was in junior high school, I asked my brother to pretend to be my father and ask for leave. But my brother called the teacher and said, "Hello, teacher, I am xx's father. My brother said he was uncomfortable today and didn't go to class anymore. ”

13. When there was no word funny girl before, everyone called me

14. People who often stayed up late would have the following situations: 1. Hallucinations 2. Not recognizing numbers 4. Poor memory 6. Unclear consciousness Just these nine o'clock, everyone remembers it.

15. It is really unhealthy to eat takeout at school.

16. It turns out that everyone is in love without public opinion. I thought everyone is single like me

17. God is fair. Although he gave you a low appearance, he gave you a high vision

18. I found a cockroach so I talked to it for a long time and vented my dissatisfaction and pressure on life to it. After smoking a cigarette, I patted it to death with slippers. It had no choice but to know too much

19. There was a crow who had been flying for a long time and was a little thirsty. It saw a bottle of water, but the bottle was too deep and it couldn't drink it at all. So it flew to the river and took small stones and threw them into the bottle. Finally, it drank the water. As it was drinking, the crow suddenly realized something was wrong: Damn! Did I fly to the river just now? ? ?

20. On the bus, I gave up my seat to an old lady. The old lady asked me with a smile: "How old is the child? "Me: "I'm 26 years old. "The old lady said in surprise: "You look so young, you look about 35 years old. I really didn't find your child, who is 26 years old. "Me: ...

21. On this day, the three brothers Liu Guan and Zhang drank together. After three rounds of wine, the three of them were a little drunk. At this time, Liu Bei said: "It's getting late, let's drink here today. We have a long way to go. ” Zhang Fei put down the wine glass in his hand and said loudly: “Brother, you are drunk, your second brother is called Yun Chang. ”

22. If you can’t get rich overnight, it’s OK for two nights, and I can accept it for a month.

23. Why don’t I have a very handsome deskmate, but my deskmate has one?

24. Yesterday I got together two of my friends. Today, the boy sent me the chat record and asked me how I replied. The girl also came over and asked me how I replied. I was dating myself?

25. Listen to my advice, don’t chase my good sisters anymore. Nothing can be good to play with me.