1. Since childhood, I have been thinking: How to control water due to heavy rain? 2. I had an argument with my mother because of a blind date, and I said: If you force me to do it, I will run away from home! Mom: Where to go? The girl next door quarreled with her mother and ran a

1. Since I was a child, I have been thinking: How to control water due to heavy rain?

2. I had a dispute with my mother because of a blind date, and I said: If you force me to do it, I will run away from home!

Mom: Where to go? The girl next door quarreled with her mother and ran away from home to her husband's house. Are you married? Do you have a family in-laws? ? ?

3. Mobile phones are really an ideal social tool. When you are too far away from your friend, you will be closer to you when you are too far away. When you are too close to your friend, you will be far away.

4. Yesterday afternoon, the leader saw a female colleague saying, "You don't go to work well a day and change your clothes three times." . .

The female colleague instantly said: If you don’t go to work hard for a day, why do you always see me changing clothes?

5. Today, my dad came back early after get off work, but he didn't go out to drink. My mom: Director has come back so early today!

I wondered: Which bureau director is he?

My mother said with a stern face: Dinner!

6. "Third brother, some people say that our brothers are not good at math!"

"Fourth brother, why do they say that?"

7. Today I was taking a taxi and the driver said to go to the sports center, and the driver quickly took me to the bath center. . .

I was holding a basketball at the door of the bath center, and I couldn't calm down for a long time. Is it true that I am not sure about , Mandarin ?

8. Today I met a girl on the street and she said to me: Brother, can you lend me 10 yuan? I haven't had a meal for a few days.

I saw that she looked impatient and even though her compassion jumped out, she said to her affectionately: Girl, you go with your brother, you have food and clothing!

The girl was so moved that she cried: Brother, I just cheated some money, why are you still robbing people?

9. Don’t say anything about thinking from the perspective of , that will only make me appreciate myself more.

10. There was a farmer working for the landlord, and the landlord said I would give you one stone of rice a month.

Farmer said, I have a bold idea: Give me one rice on the first day, two on the second day, four on the third day, and eight on the fifth day. . . All of them doubled afterwards.

Landlord thought that this farmer was stupid. If there were so few, he agreed!

Later, the farmer insisted on it for five days and finally starved to death.

11. "It is said that emotional intelligence was invented by scientists to comfort people with low IQ"

"The scientist who invented this thing has a high emotional intelligence, and it really can comfort people."

12. My mother bought a coat for my father, and my father, who has not posted a picture for many years, wrote: "Although the wool comes from the sheep, the sheep is still very happy."

13. If life experiences are not going well, even taking the bus to invest coins, I want to make a wish silently.

14. "Why can't you lose at all?" In fact, it means: "How come you can't let me take advantage of you?"

15. In general, boys often like to exaggerate themselves very vain. They are obviously tall at only 170 and say they are 175, but girls are relatively more honest and never exaggerate numbers and sometimes they will shrink numbers. They clearly weigh 120 and say they are 100.

16. On the bus.

Son: Mom, do cars burn oil?

Dad: No, some cars are also burnt.

The son pointed to the van next to him and asked: Where is the van, is it the van burning bread?

17. What is the original sin of human beings? When you were born, your father called you so many times to teach you to call him dad.

18. I posted a status: "It is better to create something new than to keep patching old things.”

Dad commented below: “So you know why we had to give birth to your younger brother. ”

19. My father often said to me: "Children, you should read more books. It is said that traveling thousands of miles and reading thousands of books. Read thousands of books and write like a god. Books are the ladder to human progress. "

Later, I grew up and heard others say "If you are ugly, you should read more", and then I realized that my dad is really good at it!!!

20. "Why do people like to draw crosses where mosquitoes bite? "

" because vampires are afraid of crosses. ”

(not original, please call me Xiang Jie)