Text: Zheng Shaoyuan May my words warm you ~
-01-
The famous British female novelist Jane Austen once described marriage as follows: Whether
can be happy in marriage is a question of opportunity. A pair of lovers who have very strong tempers before marriage, or very similar tempers, does not guarantee that they will be happy. They always got farther and farther later, and bothered each other. Since you have to live with this person all your life, you'd better understand his shortcomings as little as possible.
Two people get along for a long time, it is inevitable that they will get bored and their feelings will become weaker and weaker. These are normal phenomena. Couples should learn to accept.
In marriage, women tend to care more about the happiness of marriage, and generally pay more for marriage and family than men. But often in marriages, women's contributions and rewards are disproportionate. This also explains why women are less satisfied with marriage than men.
When a woman wants a happy marriage, it is often ineffective to train a man, and sometimes it will backfire. But to strengthen oneself, after all, you still need to be hard on yourself.
A divorced woman once said frankly: Back then, I gave everything for my family and my husband, but what I got in return was dislike and betrayal. This made me understand that if a woman wants a happy marriage, she needs to "toss" in the life of the husband and wife, so that a man cares about you more and can't stop you.
-02-
Liu Mei is 37 years old this year. She had been married for nearly ten years, but unfortunately, she finally divorced because his husband betrayed her and got involved with other women outside of marriage. .
Faced with her husband's betrayal, Liu Mei's heart was very painful and broken. She didn't understand why she had given so much in her marriage and why her husband would betray her.
When Liu Mei and her husband were just married, their relationship was very good. At that time, Liu Mei still had her own job, her figure and appearance were still not old, her husband was still obsessed with her, and there was almost nothing to talk about. More than a year after
got married, Liu Mei became pregnant. The husband was considerate of her, and asked her to be a full-time wife at home, not wanting her to be too tired.
happened to be promoted at that time, and he made a lot of money, so there was no problem supporting the family. After thinking of this, Liu Mei resigned in peace and decided to be a family-care woman.
waited until the child was born, and he was a son. The whole family was very happy. Liu Mei put the focus of life on the child, and there was much less exchange of feelings between husband and wife. Husbands sometimes feel wronged and feel that Liu Mei cares less about herself. Now she only cares about children.
Liu Mei feels that there are no laughs and laughs, what jealousy are you, a big man and your son. What Liu Mei didn't know was that it was from that time that the relationship between husband and wife gradually faded.
-03-
Don’t watch Liu Mei resign and become a full-time wife at home, but her day was not easy at all. Not only did she have to do housework, wash and cook, but also take care of the children. After the day, Liu Mei was exhausted physically and mentally, and became a lot of haggard.
And because she doesn't go out very often, Liu Mei doesn't pay much attention to her image. I only wear two sets of pajamas at home. I rarely buy new clothes. I don’t use cosmetics often. I face the sky all day long. I often do housework and coaching. My skin and body are getting worse. At that time, Liu Mei was in her early thirties but looked like a forty-year-old woman, which shows how bad her influence is.
And she thought she became like this because of this family, her husband should be grateful to herself, but what she doesn't understand is that most men are visual animals.
Husband's feelings for Liu Mei are getting weaker and weaker, and his patience is getting less and less. After entering middle age, the pressure in life has become more and more severe. The pressure in work and life of the husband has increased sharply, and his temper is not good. The
couple started quarreling over trivial matters, and the cold war became longer and longer and less and less talked. Liu Mei felt that her husband might not love herself anymore.
-04-
Finally, Liu Mei found the evidence of her husband's derailment. At that moment, Liu Mei was completely distressed and pained. She cried and asked why her husband betrayed herself.
But her husband’s answer awakened her from her dream: Look at your current appearance, how do you look like a woman? I don’t understand any taste, I just know that I’m around the stoveTurn around, and know that I want money to spend, because I quarrel with me for a little thing, I'm so fed up with you!
Liu Mei was shocked, she had given so much for this family, but in the eyes of her husband, she was worthless. She finally understood that it was wrong for a woman to pay blindly in marriage, and she would not get the corresponding return!
Liu Mei insisted on divorcing her husband without saying anything. The husband chose to go out of the house, while Liu Mei lived with his son. During the
period, she was decadent and painful, but fortunately she was able to bear it.
Now, Liu Mei has found a job, taking care of the children while working. Although she is very tired, she doesn't have to rely on others to live.
-05-
Liu Mei understands that in married life, giving should be mutual, and feelings are mutual. A person's silent contribution can only touch oneself in the end, but it can't change the other party. The correct way is to toss each other in the married life.
tossing in communication. After marriage, many couples become less and less willing to communicate with the passage of time. This is actually a taboo. Only when the communication is smooth, the problems and barriers between the couple will disappear.
tossing about work and career. Maintaining independence is something that every woman should do in marriage. And guaranteeing financial independence in marriage is something a woman must do. Only when you are financially independent can you be on an equal footing with a man in your marriage and have confidence.
toss in family responsibilities. Many women like to take care of housework, washing and cooking and other things, and they don't let their husbands do these things. But in fact, these things should be the responsibility of the husband and wife together. If a man does not do this for a long time, he will lack a sense of participation in the marriage and he will not cherish the marriage because he has paid too little. Therefore, women must let their husbands take responsibility in marriage.
The above points are the truths that women need to understand in marriage. Only by doing these can they reap a happy marriage.
-END-
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