Many of my friends hate December because it is the least friendly time of the year for singles. It’s cold, but there are Christmas Eve and Christmas that follow one after another.

1

Many of my friends hate December because it is the most unfriendly time of the year for singles.

Forget it, it’s cold, there are Christmas Eve and Christmas that follow. It seems that every festival reminds you why you don’t have a lover yet?

Why do we need to feel loved so much?

Whenever I hear this discussion, I will think of a picture from the Taiwanese drama " I may not love you ".

heroine Cheng Youqing When he got back with his scumbag's ex, he was told by a friend, "You are no different from those women walking on the street with roses in their arms."

She cried and defended herself:

"I have 30 It's my year old,

No one has hugged me well for two years,

didn't tell me that he loves me,

doesn't feel that ecstatic anymore."

"That's right!

The feeling of being loved,

will indeed make me super vanity."

Today, I want to talk about this, the vanity of being loved.

2

Why is vanity?

Because, in fact, we all know that roses, romance, affection, are more just superficial brilliance, not the core needs of love.

And women like Cheng Youqing will not seem to be blinded by these superficial brilliances.

People who have never watched the drama may not understand it. For a long time, Cheng Youqing was the first choice when people think of the "big heroine".

Good education, hard work, and healthy interpersonal relationships are all her basic configurations.

The most important thing is that is a person who is fully capable and has the conditions to take the initiative in love.

Because of its economic independence, the demand for love is simple and sober. Just have to talk, if you want to be financially, "the salary is about the same as mine" and "it doesn't matter if it's a little worse than me."

is also very good at some things Say No.

When chatting with friends, she can accurately describe the relationship she doesn't like.

"We need to have a lot to say,

I don't like that kind, except for I love you,

Please give me a glass of water, there is no one else to say."

In the relationship, she will never tolerate being misunderstood, even if she is just an ex.

At the company meeting, he confronted his ex-boyfriend Henry's current girlfriend because of the design problem. He also wanted to find an opportunity afterwards to explain the misunderstanding clearly and not give up his position.

"I must make some things clear,

Your design is very beautiful,

But a beautiful design does not equal good design."

Appearance anxiety, age anxiety, those, even more firmly Say No.

"My thirty years old is the climax of life.

represents that I finally stay away from being stupid, childish and ignorant, and flattened with purses.

The years of mentally retarded being deceived by men every day."

When I first heard this sentence, I really applauded.

But I was also confused at that time: the girl who had the courage and ability to Say No was exposed to prejudice, the feelings of making me uncomfortable, and the voices that might interfere with my life choices.

It is difficult for her to speak to her inner voice Say No: I am very lonely at this moment, and I really need a hug. I was deeply impressed by this scene of

. Cheng Youqing received a text message from her ex-boyfriend five years later, and he said hello to her. The relationship at that time ended with an ambiguous relationship between the man and other girls.

Cheng Youqing's honest reaction was that he cried. Crying uncontrollably on the street. I couldn't empathize with this fragility at that time. I don't understand. This is different from all the female growth texts I have seen on film and television. She is not the heroine of a cool article, she is not winning step by step, she is not free and easy and strong.

She cried. She showed her fragility, and now she looked back and looked very cute and real enough fragility:

"I'm cute, right? Someone will definitely love me, right?!"

The scene of her sitting in the corner of the wall crying to cheer herself up constitutes another understanding of life at the age of 30.

You say goodbye to the stupid, tight-handed, and cringe-in-comfortable generations, but you still cry and be afraid. Someone will definitely love me, right? !

3

Now I have reached Cheng Youqing's age. God, I don’t know what the script of fate is, but I bumped into the unavoidable question:

There will be someone who loves me well, right? !

Just like she promised to reunite with that "scumbag" ex, she was ridiculed and could not resist the Rose's offensive. After all, I can't resist the erosion of loneliness.

She defended loudly:

"Suddenly someone appeared to send me flowers, which is enviable.

What can I do?"

. Is it a reason for not hugging me well for two years? Is it a reason why no one loves her well when he is almost 30 years old? Is it a reason to not be able to bear loneliness?

I didn’t understand it before. I watched the fire from the other side of the river and felt that it was too bad, why should I fall into this trap? Now, if you are a friend that I trust enough, I will honestly pat my chest and tell you: Yes, that's the reason.

When this man leaned on my shoulder, I knew, "Fuck it, something was wrong.

Cheng Youqing knew in his heart that Ding Liwei was not a suitable companion. single one, he had never heard her speak seriously.

When she got along with him for the first time, she was scrambled in the relationship like a marionette. The clearest thing is the bystander, the best friend Li Daren couldn't help blurting out:

"When I hate you the most in my life,

is when you were in love with Ding Liwei.

That woman became unintentional at all, and

also has no personality."

It’s been the year, will I still jump into that pit? ridiculous.

So when those scenes reappeared, Ding Liwei wanted to pull her up again, and this time his attitude looked better. Don’t cut off your hair and release it if you want to do it yourself? Don’t keep working, can you get married to me when you go home?

There are times when he can't hold it. He even peeked at Cheng Youqing's phone and secretly deleted the text message Li Daren gave her.

Cheng Youqing certainly won't fall into this trap. She was angry, and she expressed her dissatisfaction, dissatisfaction, and no need for her than she was 5 years ago.

She clearly knows what to say no. But she couldn't say no for the primitive urge to love and hug.

This is a very classic question in this drama:

"I know I am greedy and selfish,

I want you, I want myself too."

What should I do? Can I both want it and want it?

The story is almost coming to an end. Cheng Youqing is going to get married and Ding Liwei. The style of the wedding dress, the style of the wedding, the decoration of the wedding house, everything, they all reached a consensus.

But fortunately it was not over. Finally, on the eve of the marriage, Cheng Youqing was crying and decided to face the most honest answer in his heart:

"I can't marry him with suspicion,

I was doubting my heart. "

This vanity of love, and self, cannot both want it.

4

This is why you have to re-propose Cheng Youqing.

screenwriter of "I May Not Love You" Xu Yuting , when writing this drama, I have long since been It has passed Cheng Youqing's age.

But she cannot easily skip the struggle at that stage. "I am too clear about the sadness of this stage", "so I created a world of aging", see how the protagonists "how to pull each other with the past youth".

This is a scene that I only understand yet. At the beginning of the story, the male protagonist Li Daren gave Cheng Youqing two square-faced lions.

This is the intention of the screenwriter: We, like Cheng Youqing, are too easy to be "stuck".

" is stuck in our own principles, in the struggle to compromise. "

Of course you will be frustrated, you cannot skip these levels.

And the meaning of these "stuck" is to make you confirm yourself over and over again.

Cheng Youqing, who longs to be loved, was deceived by the "vanity of being loved", and embarked on a detour called Ding Liwei. Every step is to struggle between yourself and being loved.

This is also the way for screenwriter Xu Yuting to pass this drama, and 30 What a woman in her age says:

"Don't forget to talk to yourself every day"

"Don't forget to examine whether your state in this love is happy. "

Please never doubt it.

All the love in

should help you reach yourself.

-END-

Source | Xinshixiang WeChat official account, written by: Claire, editor-in-chief: Dingding

Statement | The pictures, videos and content in the article are all reproduced from the original article, the key is sharing, and the copyright belongs to the original author and the original source. If there is any infringement, please contact us in time, and we will correct or delete it in time.