Some people say that meeting the right person at the right time will make you happy for a lifetime, and meeting the wrong person at the right time will make you sad, so you must figure out whether each other is suitable before dating the other person.
Some people also say that love is a feeling, and it cannot be stopped when the feeling comes. Don’t think too much, just love bravely.
In fact, love has its bottom line and principles. The most basic thing is that both of them must be single.
But in real life, some people often break through the moral bottom line to pursue their so-called happiness, but in the end they are moths flying into the flames.
Event Review:
Divorce
Twenty-seven-year-old Yang Wei (pseudonym) is the head of a decoration company. He is not only capable of working, but also very dedicated. The leaders of the company are very optimistic about him.
Yang Wei, who was proud of his career, was not satisfied with his love scene because he had a failed marriage. That relationship left him with infinite pain and memories, which made him unable to get out for a long time.
Originally, Yang Wei felt that he would never have love in his life, but a girl named Xu Jia (pseudonym) changed all this.
Xu Jia is one year younger than Yang Wei and works as a waiter in a hotel. The two met in that hotel. Yang Wei got drunk that day. The kind-hearted Xu Jia saw that he was vomiting uncomfortable, so she cared for and took care of him.
Yang Wei had a good impression of Xu Jia, so he asked her for contact information. Later, Yang Wei discovered in Xu Jia's space that Xu Jia had failed marriages like him. Yang Wei suddenly felt like he was sympathetic, so he began to pursue Xu Jia passionately.
Xu Jia was soon moved by Yang Wei's sincerity. A month later, she moved to Yang Wei's rental house, and the two of them lived a sweet little life.
Originally, Yang Wei thought he would marry Xu Jia and have children, and he would grow old until he grows old, but just one year later, Xu Jia proposed to break up, and Yang Wei naturally disagreed. Later, Xu Jia chose to leave without saying goodbye.
Yang Wei couldn't let go of Xu Jia, so he searched for her by any means. Xu Jia was worried that Yang Wei would do stupid things, so she had to return to his side, but her heart was no longer with Yang Wei. In order to let Yang Wei let go, Xu Jia found the mediator.
Xu Jia told the mediator that she wanted to break up but she didn't dare to say it.
The mediator said, are you worried that he will do stupid things?
Xu Jia nodded.
Yang Wei said, you are so worried about me, and you clearly care that I love me, why do you still leave me?
Yang Wei's words made Xu Jia a little overwhelmed. She told the mediator that she had no intention of talking about love at all because she missed her child.
It turns out that Xu Jia and her ex-husband Wang Guoqing (pseudonym) have a son and a daughter together. When the two divorced, the custody of the child was given to Wang Guoqing, and Wang Guoqing did not ask her for a penny of child support.
If Xu Jia wants to see the child, she can only go back to her hometown, but Yang Wei does not want her to go back to her hometown.
The mediator asked Yang Wei, why do you disagree with her going back to see the child?
Yang Wei said that she always goes with her ex-husband in the name of seeing her children.
In response to this, Xu Jia explained, I really just went back to see the child, why don’t you believe me?
Yang Wei said, every word you say is a lie, how can I believe you?
Xu Jia said, you gave everything, what about me?
Then Xu Jia told the mediator that she and Yang Wei had not divorced yet when they met. Although she was angry with her husband at that time, the two of them were not as good as they had to divorce.
Later she met Yang Wei. Yang Wei was not only handsome but also very romantic. Xu Jia quickly lost herself, but she did not make up her mind to divorce because she couldn't bear to part with her own children.
But Yang Wei repeatedly urged her to get a divorce, so Xu Jia had to delay it again and again.
In the first Spring Festival after the two met, Yang Wei insisted on going back to his hometown to celebrate the New Year with Xu Jia despite Xu Jia's opposition. After Wang Guoqing learned the news, he rushed to Xu Jia's parents' home. The two men fought because of Xu Jia.
Seeing this, Xu Jia had to file for divorce with Wang Guoqing. Originally, Xu Jia wanted to fight for custody of the child, but Wang Guoqing insisted that if he wanted to have a child, he would not want to divorce. Xu Jia, who was eager to get divorced, had to give up the custody of the child.
deceive
Xu Jia lived with Yang Wei after divorce. She originally thought she had found true love, but not long after, Xu Jia found that she and Yang Wei were very inappropriate.
According to Xu Jia, Yang Wei is a very controllable person. They have been together for more than a year. Xu Jia has to go to the construction site with Yang Wei every day. Xu Jia once asked herself to find a job, but she was opposed by Yang Wei.
The mediator said, why did he disagree with you looking for a job?
Xu Jia said that he was afraid that when I met someone else after I went out, I would change my mind.
Xu Jia also said that what scared her the most was that Yang Wei had a very irritable temper and would hit someone if he had disagreements. The most terrifying time, Yang Wei slapped her twice in the face, and then strangled her neck with a sheet.
When she said this, Xu Jia had already cried. She said that if she hadn't been begging for mercy, she might have been unable to sit here today.
Xu Jia's words made the mediator understand why Xu Jia always looked at Yang Wei with fear when he spoke. The mediator said, "Actually, you dare not say you broke up because you are afraid of him, right?"
Xu Jia said, yes, I mentioned breaking up with him, and he threatened me every time, such as killing me, and then he committed suicide, or he wanted to crash a car, etc.
Xu Jia's words shocked everyone at the scene. Yang Wei, who was standing by, heard it, "What's the point of stealing away again and again?"
Xu Jia said, if you don't let me go back to see the child, I can only leave secretly. Once I leave, you will find me at all. In the end, didn't I come back obediently?
Xu Jia's words were not recognized by Yang Wei. He told Xu Jia that it was not that she wanted to come back, but because she quarreled with her ex-husband Wang Guoqing, and Wang Guoqing broke a piece of jade she gave. She was so angry that she had to come back to find him.
The mediator said, do you mean she is hesitating between you and her ex-husband?
Yang Wei said that she and her ex-husband deceived me, and I just wanted an explanation today.
Xu Jia was very angry about Yang Wei’s accusation and said, “What have I deceived you?
Yang Wei said, my feelings are my money.
Xu Jia said, I admit that we have been together for more than a year, and you are very kind to me and always buy me clothes or something, but those are our daily consumption, and I didn't lie to you.
Yang Wei said, you collaborated with your ex-husband to lie to me, don’t you admit it? Have you forgotten that 100,000 yuan?
When the 100,000 yuan was mentioned, Xu Jia seemed very wronged. She said that I clearly told you not to go to my hometown, but you insisted on going. As a result, after you went, you two started fighting, which made me not only not famous, but also couldn't end it.
Speaking of this, Yang Wei interrupted Xu Jia and told the mediator that he did fight with Wang Guoqing. A large group of people came to Wang Guoqing's relatives and surrounded him. The leader pointed at Xu Jia and said, "Oh, today we will kill this shameless woman and let her go with you, or we will give you 100,000 yuan as compensation for your losses, and you will leave this woman."
Yang Wei said that Xu Jia didn't want to go with her at that time, but because Wang Guoqing couldn't afford the 100,000 yuan, she left helplessly with him.
In Yang Wei's opinion, Xu Jia had already planned to break up with him, and it was also discussed with her and Wang Guoqing.
The mediator said, what do you mean is that they made a trap together, don’t you give you that 100,000 yuan?
Yang Wei nodded, and he said again, I gave everything for her, but she deceived me like a fool, and I really can't accept it.
Breakup
Xu Jia denied Yang Wei's statement.
Wang Guoqing, who had been sitting off the court, told the mediator that the relationship between him and his wife was originally good. The reason why he agreed to Xu Jia go out to work was to make her feel better, but unexpectedly, he let her leave him.
Speaking of this, Wang Guoqing burst into tears. After his emotions stabilized, he said that he had originally considered that as long as Xu Jia was happy, he would not disturb her anymore, but both children were older and they missed their mother. Every time he saw the child and Xu Jia were inseparable from each other, his heart hurt very much. Later, he decided to fight for his wife back.
Regarding the deception Yang Wei said, Wang Guoqing said, we did not lie to you. If she is willing to follow you, I will never stop you, but if she does not follow you, you have no right to stop my child from looking for his mother.
Wang Guoqing's explanation was not recognized by Yang Wei. His emotions suddenly became excited. He said hysterically: "If you hadn't always called her and harassed us, we would have been very happy."
Yang Wei said that after Xu Jia divorced, they had a happy and sweet time. Later, Wang Guoqing always called Xu Jia, and Xu Jia would be unhappy as soon as he answered the phone. Xu Jia once said that if you could bring my child back, we would definitely be very good. After
, Yang Wei went to find a lawyer, who hoped that the lawyer could help Xu Jia get custody of the child.
Speaking of this, the mediator reminded Yang Wei: "What you said is all things that happened before, and now she is going to break up with you." The mediator's words calmed Yang Wei. He looked at Xu Jia with a stern look and said, "You chose him, right?"
Xu Jia did not answer Yang Wei’s question. She just said that my current role is a mother, and I have to take on the responsibility of a mother, and I cannot ignore my children.
As soon as Xu Jia finished speaking, Yang Wei said angrily: "What about me? What am I?"
Xu Jia said, forget me, I really don't have the heart to think about these things. I just want to do what a mother should do.
Before Xu Jia could finish his words, Yang Wei raised his hand and slapped Xu Jia in the face, and Xu Jia's cheek suddenly turned blue.
The mediator pointed at Yang Wei angrily and said, "Why can you still beat someone when you come here? How can you mediate if you do this?"
Xu Jia stood up with her face covering her face, and she told the mediator, now you can understand how terrifying he is, right?
While comforting Xu Jia, the mediator told Yang Wei that beating people will not solve any problem, and will only make this woman farther and farther away from you.
Yang Wei said that he just couldn't accept being deceived by others, and he couldn't accept that he didn't even give him a statement when others left.
Yang Wei also said, you can leave as soon as you say, but after I go back, I face a home where we live together. Do you know how painful I am?
Yang Wei's words touched Xu Jia. She stood up and walked to Yang Wei, bowed deeply to Yang Wei, and said, "It's me that I'm sorry for you, forget me, I wish you happiness."
Regarding Wang Guoqing, Xu Jia said that she did not consider getting back with him for the time being, she just wanted to spend some time with her child.
Finally, Xu Jia, Yang Wei and Wang Guoqing each left the mediation site, and the grudge between them came to an end.
Conclusion:
Love is beautiful.
Everyone hopes to have a passionate love affair, then enter the palace of marriage, have another lovely child, and embrace a happy life together.
But if this relationship is based on the pain of others, it will not be very glorious and will have a beautiful ending.
Just like Xu Jia and Yang Wei in the story, when the two met, Xu Jia was already a mother. The family conflict between her and her mother-in-law made her feel very depressed, and her husband's inaction made her feel insecure, so she fled from her original family and went outside to work to heal her.
But she met Yang Wei who was in love with the same disease. The two of them sparked a deformed relationship. In order to force Xu Jia to divorce, Yang Wei came to her hometown desperately and even fought with Wang Guoqing.
In Yang Wei's view, everything he does is because of love. In fact, true love is not about getting, but about silent blessings and giving.
After Xu Jia divorced, Yang Wei was really good to her, but the sweet time between the two was very short. What followed was Xu Jia's longing for her children and her ex-husband's existence in their lives like a shadow, which greatly affected Xu Jia's mood. At this time, Yang Wei should have more trust and understanding of Xu Jia, but he was full of doubt and impatient.
What's even more terrifying is Yang Wei's desire to control and irritable temper. He will hit someone if he doesn't agree with him and threaten Xu Jia with his own life. This not only makes Xu Jia feel insecure, but also makes her physically and mentally exhausted.
After a period of time, Xu Jia felt that she would not have happiness or future with Yang Wei, so she thought of breaking up, but she was afraid of Yang Wei and had to choose to run away secretly.
However, her hesitant personality caused her tossing back and forth, making it impossible for her to get rid of Yang Wei's entanglement.
In this criticized love, everyone was hurt to varying degrees. Yang Wei met the wrong person at the right time. He gave his true feelings and took on some of the expenses of the two. When Xu Jia decided to leave, he could not accept it, or even could not extricate himself. In fact, all this stems from him immersing himself in the past and not daring to face reality.
You should know that all his pain is because he has not met the right person. Once the right person appears, happiness will also come.
Wang Guoqing is obviously a victim, but he is biased when dealing with the conflict between his wife and mother, otherwise it would not have led to Xu Jia working in other places in order to escape reality.
When he discovered something about Xu Jia and Yang Wei, Wang Guoqing resolutely kept his two children by his side and did not have a penny of child support.
It is Wang Guoqing's approach that makes Xu Jia more at ease with her children and makes her feel more guilty towards her ex-husband.
People often say that maternal love is great and selfless. In fact, as a mother, the first thing to bear is responsibility.
is easy to have children, but it is easy to raise them. The most difficult to teach them. If you want to educate your children well, the easiest and direct way is to accompany them with your heart and nourish them with love.
And for the sake of his own feelings, the act of abandoning his husband and son is not only undesirable, but also unacceptable.
Xu Jia's performance also reflects her poor tolerance and sense of responsibility. Fortunately, Xu Jia is lost. After considering many aspects, she decided to give up the relationship between her and Yang Wei and take on the responsibilities that a mother should bear. It can be seen that she still has a conscience deep in her heart.
Love is free, and everyone has the right to pursue love. However, when you are already a wife, mother or husband, you not only have more family responsibilities, but also are bound by ethical principles.
If you release your inner emotions desperately and pursue your own love, you will inevitably harm others and yourself like a moth flying into a fire.
If you choose to let go and silently bless the other person, it will not only be a beautiful conversation but also a kind of fulfillment, because letting go is also a kind of love.
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