Most couples who can truly grow old together have achieved these 4 points (very). "Among the 7 billion people in the world, no matter what the reason is, it is an amazing thing for you to meet this person."

Most couples who can truly grow old together have achieved these 4 points (very

"Among the 7 billion people in the world, no matter what the reason is, it is an amazing thing for you to meet this person."

Yes, it is not easy to meet in a sea of ​​people, and it is even more lucky to be married again.

In this life, everyone hopes to keep the heart of one person and stay together forever.

However, the road ahead is long and windy. Never rest, the road to happiness is inseparable from wind and rain.

Those couples who have been together from youth to old age have all experienced these four "qi". They are not afraid of the passage of time and have reached the end of their marriage together.

"Being negative"

The book "The Meaning of Marriage" says:

"Even if we find the right person at the beginning, the other person will change soon.

Because marriage is a major event in life, it means: if we go in together, we will never be together again. It's the original person."

In many cases, it's not the person who has changed.

It's the odds and ends in life that break the filter, allowing us to reveal our truest side.

When you realize your partner is no longer perfect, your marriage is full of problems. When there is a gap, disappointment arises spontaneously.

Even if you are deeply in love in the past, you will be confused by anger, block out love and tolerance, and be harsh and critical of your partner.

Writer Duan Muwan will naturally reach a deadlock. Qing told the story of reader Ai Li's marriage.

Ai Li and her husband started to dislike each other just two years ago.

Ai Li felt that he was lazy and slovenly after getting married.

Dirty socks are scattered all over the house. She plays on the computer every day and never thinks of helping her with housework.

Her husband feels that Avery has changed and she is no longer considerate.

She always forces her introverted self to change her career. Salesmen were not allowed to take a break after get off work, and were forced to go to the gym.

As soon as they met, they would argue endlessly. From then on, they would just become angry and have a cold war.

From the first few hours, they would ignore each other. It lasted for half a month without saying a word.

Aili cried in grievance: "I wanted to have a long life when I got married, but why did the marriage deteriorate over time?"

Duanmu Wanqing wrote back, "Aili wanted to have a long life." The reason why some marriages have problems is that they still use love standards to demand marriage, expect the other party to be perfect, and imagine that the road to marriage will be smooth.

But facts have proved that it is difficult to maintain a marriage based on fleeting heartbeats and beautiful fantasies.

To have a lasting and healthy relationship, you must give up your fantasies, accept the other person's real shortcomings, and retain your love for him/her.

Just like Hu Yinmeng said:

"If you want to maintain a relationship, the less expectations, the better. If you don't have any expectations, you can love unconditionally."

Just entered marriage, and we gradually saw each other. Of all things, two people with different living habits will inevitably have some collisions.

But at this time, we can truly enter each other's life and have the opportunity to discover other shining points in him or her.

With a tolerant heart, lowering your expectations for the other person, and slowly polishing the foundation of the early marriage, you can make your married life stable and sweet.

Middle-aged couples, never separated from "not angry"

When people reach middle age, their marriage has gone through the initial sweetness and becomes dull in the calm daily life.

However, life is a war without smoke.

Parents, children, family and work, everything is like a mountain of mountains, piling up on the shoulders and unable to be dragged away.

The rain, snow, wind and frost in fate also come without warning.

At this time, thanks to the silent companionship of the person beside me, I was able to endure the ups and downs of life.

Hong Kong TVB Gold Medal Green Leaf Liao Qizhi is best at playing various small roles crushed by fate.

And his real life was even more difficult and twists and turns.

In 2003, his youngest son Nono was diagnosed with leukemia, and his wife Chen Miner was greatly stimulated. Depression recurred.

Liao Qizhi couldn't care less about his sadness and started running between home and the hospital.

During the day, he first sent his eldest son and second son to school, and then went to the hospital to feed, bathe and play with his younger son.

At night, he still couldn't rest. He had to rush to the TV station to host a program and make money to support his family.

Liao Qizhi's hard work made Chen Min'er feel distressed. She couldn't bear her husband to bear it alone.

Even though she was in poor spirits, she still chose to go to the hospital occasionally to accompany her young son in his fight against the disease.

As a mother, she has endured more than a year of chemotherapy, the occurrence of complications, the rupture of the tube for injecting drugs into the body, and all the pain her little son has suffered.

In fact, these stimuli are harmful to Chen Miner's depression.

But no matter how hard it was, she never flinched. She always bravely weathered the difficulties with her husband and faced the difficulties given by fate with him, because they were one.

has a good saying: Every couple has a life-long friendship.

No matter how the years turn, as long as we stay together and stay with each other, no matter how dark the night is, there will always be a moment of dawn, no matter how great the difficulty is, there will always be a day to get through it.

Gorky said:

"Marriage is the spiritual union of two people, and its purpose is to overcome all the hardships and hardships in the world."

The value of marriage is not only that two people share the prosperity of the world, but also is reflected in the life when they go through the darkness of life. They became close friends who supported each other and cherished each other.

I have witnessed your life, and you have supported me.

Walking in the torrent of time whizzing by, we together resist the rain, snow, wind and frost, share the hardships of life, grow old slowly, and grow old.

After middle age, I feel "convinced"

In middle age, when the pots and pans are ringing together, the love between husband and wife seems to be diluted by time.

Some people become numb and let their feelings slide to the cold side.

And some people, constantly recalling the ups and downs along the way, can't help but trust the people around them, see love in their eyes, and their relationship becomes stronger.

In 1956, on the sixty-sixth birthday of Chen Yinke, the master of Chinese studies.

He was always restrained and couldn't hide his excitement. He was full of praise for his wife Tang Yun (yún): "Zhi Su is still in the mood for wine, but the fat and power are good enough to be a marquis."

Year after year, his gray hair gradually grew. , there are wrinkles, but he is more respected and loved than before, and he can't live without this beloved wife who has experienced hardships and walked through all the ups and downs with him.

At the age of 54, Chen Yinke, who was at the peak of his academic research, suffered from lesions in both eyes and it was difficult to regain his sight.

For a scholar who needs to read books and read words every day, this is like a bolt from the blue.

However, Chen Yinke was not depressed for long because he had another pair of bright eyes.

When he wanted to know everything about the world, his wife read books and newspapers for him;

When he wanted to find some information, his wife helped him browse through the vast literature;

When he wanted to write poems and courseware, his wife stood aside quietly. , record and organize for him at any time.

Although Chen Yinke couldn't see it, his wife's dedication was engraved in his heart bit by bit.

He attributed his academic achievements to his wife, and the cover of every book must be inscribed by her.

Chen Yinke also regards his wife as the backbone of the family, and has solemnly told his daughters many times:

"Without mother, there would be no family. We must all protect our mother."

As for Tang Yun, she understands that her husband is willing to pass on Chinese culture The original intention of dedicating one's life.

Therefore, she could endure the occasional heart discomfort, support her frail body, and devote herself selflessly for decades.

The deep friendship between the couple is as plain as water, but touching.

is very similar to the marriage that writer Li Xiaoyi admires:

"The passion subsides, time flies by, I still like each other, I still feel that everything is the best arrangement, everything is the best choice."

Time is long, Full of unknowns.

However, even if there are bumps and tumbles along the way, we have strengthened our emotions in the wind and rain and deeply trust each other's character, so we will no longer be afraid of the impermanence of time.

Only by knowing each other for a long time can we trust each other for a long time; only for a long time for trust can we stay together.

are "convinced" by each other, they can withstand the intrusion of the fleeting years, and come out of the peaceful years.

stays with her until she grows old, and her face is full of blessings.

was young and ignorant, thinking that only passionate love would lead to a happy life.

As everyone knows, a marriage that lasts forever is the longest confession of love in the daily necessities, vegetables and meals.

No matter what the circumstances, only with mutual support can we have the rest of our lives.

Every time I read the marriage story of Qian Xuesen and Jiang Ying , I am always deeply touched.

One of them is China's "Father of Science and Technology", a double-Ph.D. scholar, who only cares about academics.

One is a vocalist who studied in Germany, a standard literary young woman, full of romantic feelings.

doesn't match up no matter how you look at it, but this couple knows how to fall in love with each other's strengths and live a tolerant life.

Qian Xuesen used to stay alone in the study until early morning after dinner. Jiang Ying was not angry. She respected his work habits.

As for Qian Xuesen, he would not force Jiang Ying, who came from a superior background, to be a good wife and mother, making soup every day.

When she was in a foreign land, Jiang Ying learned to use her piano-playing hands to cook and take care of the housework.

Qian Xuesen couldn't bear it, so he bought a bamboo flute , and played a tune with his wife who was busy with housework from time to time to arouse the true happiness in her heart.

After returning to China, his wife began to work at the Central Experimental Opera House.

Whenever his wife performs on stage, Qian Xuesen will also attend with his colleagues to give his wife the highest level of support.

If Mr. Qian was too busy at work, Jiang Ying would go to great lengths to record the performance and play it back to him to relieve her husband's tension at work.

As time goes by, beauty is replaced by white hair.

At the age of eight, they finally have the opportunity to put down their work and cuddle up with each other.

They would walk in tandem and take a quiet walk in the morning light. They would also go to concerts and watch art exhibitions together.

Jiang Ying said happily:

"Our spare time life is always full of artistic flavor."

Qian Xuesen was happily grateful:

"When I encounter difficulties in a piece of work and can't figure it out, it's often Jiang Ying's singing made me suddenly enlightened and enlightened. How happy I am! "

Two people in different spiritual fields rely on tolerance and consideration, friendship and loyalty, gratitude and cherishment, and stay together in the world of fireworks. The road is winding, getting farther and farther.

Some people say that growing old together sounds touching, but in reality, it requires a long period of trial and patience.

is neither romantic nor dreamy, and is filled with a lot of triviality and mediocrity.

Yes, people will only truly understand the definition of "white head" in their old age:

Traveling through thousands of mountains and rivers, through many hardships, you and I have never changed our original intentions, and we will stay by each other's side for a long time. We are grateful for each other's support. Existence is the greatest blessing in this life.

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Time is long, and how many couples spend time together day and night, letting their feelings slip away, and become strangers before the halfway point.

They lament the short-lived love, lament the instability of marriage, and complain that their partners are inconsiderate...

But they have never thought that Rome was not built in a day.

Good marriages have all gone through these four stages:

"negative energy" during the wedding period; "unfavorable energy" during the ups and downs; "convinced" after the ups and downs; and "blessing" during the stable period.

All marriages that can lead to a happy ending have been forged and tempered day and night, developing understanding and compassion, and finally releasing dazzling brilliance.

Such a marriage is worthy of the bleakness of the world. As time goes by, it is enviable and touching.

I hope that you and I can stay with our loved ones until we grow old and spend the rest of our lives together.

Youshujun said

In this life

the higher the expectations, the greater the disappointment