01
Some time ago, a question on Zhihu caused a heated discussion among the public, with more than 2.3 million views.
The title is this: The house for the daughter’s dowry by the woman’s parents is pre-marital property, and it is too shameless to use it as a dowry.
The subject does not understand: In today’s era of high housing prices, the value of the house is self-evident, why women pay attention to whether men have houses when they are looking for objects. How about a man who rejects a woman who has a house so much?
Actually, the topic of women buying houses before marriage has been around for a long time.
Among the related topics that we know, it is not difficult to see the hostility of men towards buying a house girl before marriage. Some people even bluntly said " . After that, you will hold your house and cry every time you go to your house. I always think of you losing me because of it. ”
Why do these men mind buying a house before marriage? There are several reasons:
One is,Some men believe that women buy a house before marriage to guard against boys and to prepare for divorce. Women who buy a house before marriage have the confidence to divorce, and they are not easy to control after marriage.
Second, some men believe that buying a house before marriage violates their own interests. Most of the houses bought by girls before marriage are not used as wedding houses, nor do they live with their partners. And they are burdened with large mortgages for this, which in a disguised way reduces the quality of life of the man after marriage.
Therefore, for a boy who owns his own house, it is not good for the woman to have a house before marriage, and he has to add debt.
Third, because girls generally have the idea of "marrying up", if they have a room before marriage, they are likely to raise their requirements. For example, if they have a loaned room, they will require the man to have a full room.
02
Span Part of the views of men before marriage.So from the perspective of women, why do more and more women choose to buy a house before marriage?
is mainly due to the judicial interpretation of the new Marriage Law introduced in 2018 for spouse debts.Let more people realize that In today's environment, it is difficult for proletarians to obtain the family property of the possessor through marriage.
In other words, the judicial interpretation of the new marriage law is equivalent to forcing women to be completely independent in material.
Think of traditional marriages, most of them are men who are responsible for making money and raising the family, and women are responsible for the husband and child. But in the context of the new marriage law, the value of women’s housework after marriage is not necessary. Only the assets are uttered and unshakable.
In June of this year, a divorce case on the Internet caused heated discussions among netizens.
Ms. Qi from Taizhou, Zhejiang and Mr. Yang lived separately after they got married. Ms. Qi brought children in her hometown, and Mr. Yang worked outside. Three years later, the two were unable to mediate due to their conflicts and went to the court for divorce.
Ms. Qi believes that she should be compensated by Mr. Yang for doing housework and taking care of children. Therefore, she requested Mr. Yang to pay compensation at the standard of 5,000 yuan per month from the date of marriage, totaling 190,000 yuan. At the same time, he requires the child's custody to belong to him, and Mr. Yang pays the custody fee according to the standard of 2,000 yuan per month.
The final judgment of the court is: Mr. Yang compensates Ms. Qi with a one-time compensation of 15,000 yuan,And in accordance with the monthly standard of 700 yuan to pay support.
As soon as the court ruled, netizens quarreled:
"Does housework for three years for 36 months, compensation is 15,000 yuan, or 395 yuan per month. Where can I find such cheap labor?"
Why did Ms. Qi only get 15,000 yuan in the end?
This is actually based on the relevant provisions on the family in the "Civil Code" that came into effect on January 1 this year.
“If one of the spouses has more obligations for raising children, caring for the elderly, assisting the other in work, etc., at the time of divorce, they have the right to request compensation from the other party, and the other party shall make compensation.”
So how to determine the amount of compensation? The court generally considers the following four factors:
the time that both parties live together after marriage;
the specific income of the woman in household labor; _span4pspan1 1 ;
The general standard of living in the local area;
The situation of each city and each family is different,The amount of housework compensation is naturally different. But overall, it is still very low.
For men who have a childbirth before marriage and have income after marriage, divorce has little effect on him. On the one hand, the law protects pre-marital property, and the woman cannot divide it. On the other hand, the value of the wife’s housework after marriage is not recognized by the law. Even if the wife is divorced, the wife will not be able to divide much housework compensation.
03
is not fair to women.
For example, the following clauses:
1. Whether it is before or after marriage, if the house is bought by the parents and registered under the name of the child, it is not personal property at the time of divorce. Make an assignment.
2. The house bought by the man before marriage, he sold the house without authorization after marriage. If the wife wants to recover the house, the court will not support it;
3. The house bought before marriage The appreciation part has nothing to do with the spouse.
It is indeed too unfair for women who do not give birth and have husbands and children under traditional marriage.
But on the other hand, this may not be a good thing.
Because in my opinion, the biggest unfairness to women in this world is that they will always be pointed out to them a shortcut in life.
When she was young, women would hear someone say to her: “Girls don’t need to study hard, just find a rich man to marry.”
grew up, , Women will hear the voice again: "What's the use of such a high degree? A woman is too good and a man dare not marry." "Women's career is not a skill, but a good wife and a good mother are the skills." The flowers and the ring said to her: "You quit your job, I will support you. It's too much for you to be a full-time comfortably at home." In front of women. Some of these women began to have unrealistic fantasies,Thinking that marriage will be their last refuge, just finding the right man can save future generations without having to work hard.
Remember that Beauvoir wrote a passage in "Second Sex": " The great fortune of a man is that he, whether he is an adult or a child, has to set foot on an extreme A hard road, but this is the most reliable one; a woman’s misfortune lies in being surrounded by almost irresistible temptations. She is not required to work hard, but is only encouraged to slide down to reach bliss. When she realizes she has been caught When the mirage fooled, it was too late, and her power was exhausted in a failed adventure."
The new marriage law forced women to awaken, and they finally realized that marriage is impossible. Become a sanctuary for women.
Women no longer live in illusory fairy dreams, they become like men, fighting, fighting, and fighting like a warrior.
Women are no longer willing to take youth as a bet, to bet on men's sincerity, and entrust their wealth and life in the hands of men.
Women no longer believe in a man’s most beautiful love sentence-I raise you, because they have begun to soberly realize that the sentence "I raise you" when they get married, accidentally becomes a divorce. The sentence "I raised you".
04
back to the first topic of buying a house before marriage .
The "Survey Report on Women's Housing Status in 2021" released by the Shell Research Institute shows that as of 2020, the proportion of female buyers in Guangzhou is 46%, a slight increase compared to the previous two years. 66.27% of women think that they need to have a house of their own before marriage.
This is a good thing.
This data not only reflects the improvement of women's economic level in recent years, but also reflects that women have a more sober awareness of marriage.
Due to physiological reasons, women have a higher risk in marriage than men. After all, having children will cause most women to delay their careers for several years, and even some women will lose their jobs.
If you don’t have a certain amount of pre-marital property, or if you simply give the man the pre-marital property for decoration, once the relationship goes wrong, you will become particularly passive.
Buying a house before marriage will undoubtedly provide women with a certain degree of confidence and security.
In fact, a girl who buys a house before marriage is not a calculation or a belief in love.
only they realize clearly, The biggest backer of a woman is never marriage, nor her other half, but herself.
I hope women all over the world can understand that only by practicing and improving themselves can they advance and defend in marriage, live up to their youth, and live up to their own lives.
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