Regarding whose home to go to for the New Year, in the program " Please Leave the Refrigerator ", papi Jiang once said: "To your parents, their son is the most important; to my parents, their daughter is the most important. It is better for us to spend time with our parents first."
In previous marriages, as long as a woman got married, she had to go to her husband's house to celebrate the New Year. If a woman does not set rules at her husband's house during the New Year, firstly, the husband's family will look down on you, secondly, the man will think that you have lost face to him, and thirdly, the mother-in-law will feel that she is not "high and powerful" enough.
56 Aunt Zhou Zhou, when she was young, because she was an only daughter, she always wanted to be with her parents during the Chinese New Year, so she and her ex-husband discussed going back to their respective homes and finding their own mothers. During other festivals, they would take their children to visit their parents-in-law.
However, the wish is beautiful, but the reality is cruel. Three years later, her mother-in-law instigated her ex-husband to divorce Aunt Zhou and remarry her, so that she could have grandchildren for her family because Aunt Zhou gave birth to a daughter.
But at that time, Aunt Zhou’s ex-husband was reluctant to let go. It was not until he met the so-called “true love” at the age of 46 that he divorced Aunt Zhou and planned to marry a woman who was more than ten years younger than him.
After the divorce, Aunt Zhou never found her again. Instead, her ex-husband scared away "true love" because of his "sincere" devotion. He wanted to go back and remarry Aunt Zhou, but it became a dream.
Confidant: 56-year-old Aunt Zhou
I am Aunt Zhou. I am 56 years old this year. I have been divorced from my ex-husband for 10 years. I don’t want to but have the idea of remarrying him because of the “coronavirus”. I don’t know how to choose?
My ex-husband and I were in a typical factory “master-apprentice relationship”. After graduating from technical school at the age of 18, I was assigned to work as a lathe in a factory. My master was a "handsome guy" 4 years older than me. He had a "goat" beard that was very fashionable at the time, and he had a fairy-like air.
After dating for three years, my ex-husband and I got married in the last welfare room allocation at work. At that time, my parents were particularly reluctant for me to live with my parents in the countryside because I was the only daughter in the family and my mother was unable to have children due to physical reasons.
Therefore, my parents especially hope that I can find a child who grew up together in our courtyard, so that my parents understand each other and have similar family backgrounds. But at that time, I was "satisfied with love", but I just fell in love with my ex-husband's skin and his coaxing mouth.
In the first year of my marriage, my parents were afraid that I would not be able to adapt to living in the countryside, so they prepared very thick cotton-padded clothes for me. It was my first time to celebrate the New Year at my husband's house. My parents-in-law were nice to me and the kang was very hot, but they felt that I was not a wife who knew how to live a good life. They always wanted me to light a fire and cook, but I couldn't do it either.
That's it. The next year, I discussed with my ex-husband that my parents would only have one child for me. During the Chinese New Year, we would discuss it with my parents-in-law and we could go back to our respective homes. Unexpectedly, this triggered a hornet's nest. My mother-in-law scolded her and even took my parents with her, so I stopped going.
After I gave birth to my daughter, my parents-in-law felt that I had cut off their family, and they instigated my ex-husband to divorce me and remarry. But at that time, my ex-husband was unwilling and courageous. Because at that time, my father still had a say in the workplace, and besides, I was the only daughter in the family. My parents provided us with a lot of subsidies, but my ex-husband was reluctant to let me go because he loved me too much.
In fact, it is nothing more than profit. In a flash, my daughter is in college, and my old father has passed away due to illness. I am also a middle-aged woman. My ex-husband and I have found "true love" and want to divorce me to pursue the rest of my beautiful life.
I have been stumbling for most of my life. I can only accept my fate without saying anything. It is better to divorce and never see each other again.
Nowadays, my daughter has long since married and had children in other places, and my mother has also passed away. My daughter and I are the only ones left in the world, and I still feel a little scared and lonely.
My ex-husband thought that after divorcing me, he would be able to remarry a woman who was more than ten years younger than him. Unexpectedly, his "true love" deceived her. She is a woman with a husband, and it is impossible to divorce her for her ex-husband. At that time, she only talked to her ex-husband because she was of use value.
My devastated ex-husband approached me and wanted to remarry, but I refused.Later, he lived alone, but there was never a shortage of women to be with him, especially after his ex-husband retired at the age of 60 and became a "dancing star" in our square, many women were willing to fall in love with him.
After the epidemic was released, many people around us were infected. People in the community used loudspeakers all day long to shout, try not to go out, and stay at home in silence. But there are still many people who are not afraid. When they should dance and go out, they are still going on.
One day in the middle of the night, my ex-husband called me and told me that he had been infected and that the medicine he had prepared at home had been taken away by the 45-year-old woman who was with him. He was so uncomfortable that he could only call me in the middle of the night, hoping that I would "save him" for the sake of the couple.
At that time, I did not hesitate. I found my own backup medicine, took my own toiletries, and brought home vegetables and dry food. I planned to take care of my ex-husband at his place. I would come back when he was well.
Unexpectedly, after my ex-husband only had a fever for one day and one night, he was fine. There was no cough or the feeling of a knife in my throat. Instead, I started to have a high fever of over 39 degrees and was shivering non-stop.
My ex-husband took care of me patiently and carefully, and even went to my house several times to get me a change of clothes. After taking care of me for 7 days, I slowly returned to normal, but the cough and sore throat kept coming back to me.
I said that I would go back to my own home and recover slowly, but my ex-husband wouldn’t let me go regardless of anything he said. Instead, he played the emotional card with me. He said that he knew that he was wrong at the time and hoped that I could give him a chance to make amends and let us start over.
At that time, I just felt that my ex-husband was also my daughter’s biological father. We had been together for more than 20 years. When life and death were at stake, I would not leave him alone. But I am also grateful for his care for me, but we remarried and I don’t know what to do.
I returned to my home and thought about it seriously for a long time, but I still couldn't agree to my ex-husband's request to remarry.
Zen heart has something to say:
Mr. Yang Jiang once explained the essence of marriage sharply, and you can understand a lot if you see it through: "Middle-aged couples all rely on their conscience. When the passion subsides, marriage has just begun. The essence of marriage is companionship and responsibility, while mature love relies on conscience, and the second half of life depends entirely on responsibility."
Real marriage is companionship and responsibility in ordinary daily life, a life of daily necessities. Rather than the so-called romance, romantic feelings, and sweet words. In married life, no matter how passionate you are, no matter how beautiful your face is, no matter how proud your heart is, they will gradually be erased by time, because this is life.
Aunt Zhou's ex-husband divorced because of so-called "true love". He not only betrayed the marriage, but also betrayed Aunt Zhou who treated him sincerely. Although he took care of Aunt Zhou during her illness, this was not the reason why Aunt Zhou forgave him.
Although many people will say that at this age, the original partner to be with is better than the partner to be with, but I think Aunt Zhou only needs to follow her heart, and if she doesn’t want to remarry, don’t force yourself to avoid being hurt again.
Do you think Aunt Zhou should agree to her ex-husband’s request for remarriage?
Author: Huagui Zenxin
Pay attention to my words and enter your soul. You have stories, I have tea, and we can chat for the rest of our lives together.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.
