"Worthless garbage."
"Why aren't you dead?"
"Your family will be better off without you!"
May 20, 2019, was supposed to be the graduation ceremony of Boston University in the United States. Alexander Urtula, a 22-year-old elite student from the Philippines, was also one of the graduates.
On this day, his parents also rushed to school specially to celebrate their son's graduation.
However, the two people who were originally excited did not wait for their excellent son Urtula. Instead, they waited for a call from the police.
During the phone call, they were regretfully informed that Urtula mysteriously committed suicide by jumping off the building 90 minutes ago.
The parents could never imagine how their son, who had always been optimistic and cheerful, would think of going to a dead end?
Until they got Urtula's mobile phone and found a total of more than 47,000 "death-inducing" text messages, and all of these messages were sent by his son's girlfriend who had been in love for a long time...
1,
Urtula was an excellent sunny boy who had been studying biology at Boston University.
In 2017, at an alumni meeting organized by the school, he met Inyoung You, a Korean student who was 1 year younger than him.
You was studying economics in school at the time, and was very enthusiastic and cheerful. The two young people hit it off very well, and they started dating after a few contacts.
At first, the relationship between the two was very sweet. They often stayed together and talked about everything. However, the good times did not last long, and soon their relationship was changed because of a small incident.
It was the second year of their relationship. Urtula accidentally met his ex-girlfriend from the same school, and his current girlfriend You did not know about it at first.
But unfortunately, You found out in the end, and she was originally a very controlling girl. Suddenly she found that her boyfriend, who had always been obedient, actually acted out of her control, and she became very crazy.
You felt that she had been betrayed, so she began to abuse her boyfriend crazily. At first, her words were basically: "Come to suicide" or "Go to si."
Urtula had no choice but to apologize continuously and show his loyalty to You, saying bluntly:
"You own everything about me, only you. You completely control and dominate me emotionally and physically. I will give you anything you want. Your happiness is my only priority..."
But obviously, his girlfriend did not restrain herself from this, and this insult even continued for 18 months, until Urtula committed suicide and died.
As a boy who was once sunny and confident, Urtula certainly once realized that something was wrong with his situation.
He once sent a text message to two friends complaining: "I am worried about my condition and I need help."
The two friends immediately helped him contact the university's internal mental health hotline. However, after diagnosis, the school doctor believed that Urtula's condition was okay and no forced help was needed.
He himself was a bit chauvinistic and unwilling to admit the fact that he was controlled by his girlfriend, so he did not receive further psychological treatment.
Unexpectedly, the turning point of the incident was missed like this, and Urtula also lost a chance to survive.
2.
At the beginning of 2019, You began to get even more serious, not allowing her boyfriend to have contact with other female friends, not even sexual friends.
Occasionally when walking in school and meeting an acquaintance, Urtula would say hello out of politeness, and You would get furious and then send hundreds of text messages to insult her boyfriend.
And in the process, You gradually discovered that every time she insulted her boyfriend, not only would he not be angry, but he would become even more humble.
In addition to verbal suppression, as long as Urtula does anything in life that his girlfriend is dissatisfied with, he will be forced to die by the other party.
For example, if he occasionally didn't reply to messages immediately, or fell asleep before her, You would claim that he was going to hurt himself, and would even send him bloody photos of people preparing to commit suicide.
You also kept telling Urtula that before committing suicide, he would write a suicide note condemning him and make it public, so that he would not be able to live in peace in the future and become an eternal sinner.
Under such repeated torture for 18 months, Urtula seemed to have reached a dead end:
He could not break up with You because he was afraid that the other party would commit suicide; at the same time, he could not change all the atrocities he had endured.
In desperation, Urtula sadly promised:
"I will leave this damn earth, please don't do anything stupid, don't hurt yourself...
I will leave your life, I will die like you want... I will erase myself from this world." "
Later, the prosecutor handling the case believed that You had completely controlled Urtula mentally and emotionally, and even continued to make demands and threats even after learning that the other party suffered from depression .
Especially two months before Urtula's death, You's language became even sharper. In addition to "go si", she would also call Urtula a waste and good for nothing.
In a text message sent in April of that year, You said this:
"I'm serious, just kill yourself, just to do everyone a favor. You are a fool, worthless piece of shit... You don't deserve anything in this world!"
On May 18, You sent another text message, and the content was even more breathtaking:
"Do you want to make me angry again? Do you want me to cut my throat? Is this what you want? Why do you have to let me go?" Will you listen to me if you threaten me with death? "
Under the pressure, Urtula really thought about death. He texted his girlfriend back on May 20 and told her that he would die as she wished:
"I am very happy to spend last night with you. I love you and this is all my fault. "
At this time, You finally realized that her boyfriend might really be out of mind, so she started to rush to Urtula's location and prayed to him not to commit suicide, but it was too late.
3.
html On the morning of May 20, Urtula chose to end his young life an hour and a half before the graduation ceremony.He came to the Roxbury parking lot alone and jumped from a tall building.
When you realized that your boyfriend was wrong, you did send a text message to stop him, but you did not choose to contact law enforcement or medical institutions, and missed the last rescue of Urtula.
The police believe that she was afraid that she would be condemned by society after Urtula was rescued.
However, the 47,000 text messages in the other party's mobile phone exposed her behavior of instigating the murder.
Everyone later discovered that during the 18 months that Urtula was under her mind control, the two sent a total of 75,000 text messages to each other, and the 47,000 text messages sent by You were basically insulting and instigating.
You, who was originally scheduled to graduate in May 2020, was completely dumbfounded this time. She quickly dropped out of Boston University three months after the incident and returned to South Korea.
However, in October of the same year, she was extradited back to the United States, and local prosecutors subsequently charged You with intentional manslaughter.
In this regard, You has always refused to plead guilty and insisted that her boyfriend's suicide had nothing to do with her.
In order to escape guilt, she also released some text messages through a public relations company, implying that she had tried to prevent her boyfriend from committing suicide and reminded his brother before his death.
Urtula with his classmates
In desperation, the procuratorate took the next best option and was sentenced to 2 and a half years + 10 years of probation for manslaughter.
This means that You will not have to go to prison to serve a sentence without violating the probation regulations, but you will be restricted in your range of movement during the sentence, and you will also be forced to receive psychological treatment and community service.
During this time, she worked for a small business in the United States, attended regular counseling sessions, and was supervised by a probation officer.
But in fact, it seems now that the sunny and outstanding Urtula was originally an elite boy with a bright future, but he chose to commit suicide when he graduated. He was closely related to the long-term abuse, suppression, and threats from his girlfriend.
As the saying goes, "A good word can warm you in three winters, but a bad word can hurt you in six months." I hope everyone understands how shameful and dangerous it is to slander and insult others at will.
also hopes that all people who have been or are being maliciously suppressed and harmed by others can realize that they are unique individuals in this world: valuable, capable, and have a future. All these cannot be controlled by others through words and threats.
Protecting yourself and being kind to others is the true meaning of life.
