Cuckoo teacher
, as a treasure mother, is chasing an educational variety show: "Dear Little Desk". In the
program, there is a scene that makes me feel deeply.
In a small interactive session, a child asked: In the eyes of
parents, am I the most important?
Ye Yiqian, Chen Jianbin and most of the guests answered in the affirmative.
is the only one, Fu Seoul, who made a negative answer of .
Fu Seoul said that she hopes that mother can live out of herself and not regard her daughter as the most important part of her life.
This reminds me of the papi sauce that was pushed into the hot search last year because of the sort of life.
In addition to Fu Seoul, papi-chan once said something similar. When sorting the most important parts of life, papi sauce ranks herself first, and the child only ranks third.
believes that spends the longest time with himself because of papi sauce, and the child can only spend a certain period of his life with him.
But in life, if you are asked whether your child is the most important thing, I believe that more than 90% of parents will answer in the affirmative.
It is natural for parents to love their children. The problem with
is that if the child is always regarded as the most important part of life, the love of parents will have no bottom line, and the child may even become pampered and proud.
To please children and spoiling
is a common problem of most parents.
Love children is the nature of parents.
In this world, there are no parents who do not love their children, but there are too many parents who overdoing their children.
To please children without bottom line is a common problem for many parents.
, a short film in the United States, "Just One Time", satirizes the responsive parents' love for their children without a bottom line. The
short film begins. A mother is cooking in the kitchen and a father is sitting on the sofa and reading the newspaper. It was originally a peaceful and peaceful picture, but strangely, both of them were missing a few fingers.
As soon as the picture turned, a girl who skipped rope suddenly ran in and told her mother that she wanted to eat ice cream and promised "just once."
Mother pampered and touched her daughter's head helplessly, and then cut her daughter's hair band with a knife.
Next, the daughter tied the hair band to her mother's little finger. Unexpectedly, mother cut off her finger with a knife. After
, the daughter took her mother's finger to the ice cream stand to exchange ice cream. Sister
saw her sister eating ice cream, so she also begged her father to let herself eat ice cream.
When the younger sister took the father's finger to change the ice cream, there were many children holding fingers in front of the line.
And there are many fingers on the ice cream stand. It seems that such things often happen in short films. Although the plot in the
short film is absurd, it is thought-provoking.
In life, how many parents have worked so hard to satisfy their children's desires at the expense of themselves?
How many children suck their parents' blood and are accustomed to their parents' efforts?
educator Makarenko believes that the most terrible thing parents give their children is not to beat and scold, but to give everything to their children.
Whether it is material satisfaction or psychological concession, parents should have a degree of love and tolerance for their children.
Otherwise, this love will eventually turn into a wounding weapon, hurting yourself, and hurting children.
love without a bottom line
can't teach the child who knows well
Before, a mother and her son maxed out the Internet. The son of
is addicted to games and is unwilling to go to school. His mother finally found her child outside a shopping mall. At this time, her son was sitting on a chair playing games with Erlang's legs tilted. The mother of
couldn't persuade her son anyhow, but in desperation, the mother actually kneeled to her son.
But the son was neither persuaded nor moved by the mother's good intentions. Instead, I took a picture of my mother kneeling and posted it to Moments: Happy everyday.
Although we don't know how this mother usually gets along with her son, it is not difficult to imagine that in daily dealings, the mother must be obedient and pleased with the child in every possible way.
can be a bottomless love, not a child full of love, but a child who doesn't know how to return .
A tragic event happened in Jiangxi a few weeks ago.
A 21-year-old man in Shangrao, Jiangxi, is idle on weekdays. One day in September, he asked his mother for money but was refused. The
man became angry with his mother, and the process of his murder was witnessed by his 12-year-old brother. In order to cover up his evil deeds and prevent this from being exposed, the man suffocated his brother in the basin.
Why does this man do such a cruel thing? Why does he, who has long been an adult, do not want to work to support himself, but he is too lazy to eat and ask his mother for money?
Maybe, this has something to do with his parents' education from a young age.
If a child’s parents are obedient to him when he is young, he will grow up to become idle and overly dependent on his parents.
Once his parents can't satisfy him, he will complain about his parents and even do detrimental things.
read this sentence on the Internet:
you have no bottom line to please, not selfless, but powerless except to please.
believes in many parents, not to pet children and pet children. The original intention of all parents' behavior is to love their children.
has no bottom line to pet and please, maybe just a helpless move in the process of educating children.
But please remember that 's bottomless flattery is not love, but harm, causing the child to become a heartless person.
Smart parents
know how to grasp the balance between "love" and "teaching"
Smart parents never give their children bottomless love, whether materially or spiritually.
In this respect, Huo Qigang and his wife’s parenting methods are worth learning from many parents.
The Huo family is a well-known wealthy family, but they never over-spoil children.
First of all, although the Huo family is rich, the Huo Qigang and his wife did not over-enrich their children in material terms.
Once, Guo Jingjing took his son out, and sharp-eyed netizens discovered that Guo Jingjing's son was wearing the same shoes of her son. The price of the shoes was more than 200.
As this netizen said, children do not have a clear concept of luxury goods and brands.
No matter whether it is a rich family or an ordinary family, there is no need to deliberately emphasize "we have money" to the children, and there is no need to overemphasize "richness" materially. Not only that, but Huo Qigang and his wife also know how to balance the relationship between love and education in parenting.
We all know that "separate generations", grandparents and grandparents always love to pet their children, and Huo Qigang's father Huo Zhenting is no exception.
Guo Jingjing once mentioned in an interview that once his father-in-law Huo Zhenting wanted to take his grandson Huo Zhongxi to play.
At that time, Huo Zhongxi had not finished his homework, so Guo Jingjing agreed with his son and was not allowed to go out to play without finishing his homework. Therefore, Guo Jingjing asked his son to finish his homework before he could play with his grandpa.
In many families, moms and dads feel headache and helpless for the older generation's intervention in the education of their children, but out of respect or peacekeeping, they all turn a blind eye.
This also makes the child become more and more unscrupulous depending on the pampering of grandparents.
However, Guo Jingjing did not give in because of Huo Zhenting’s identity. Instead, he let his son understand the importance of agreement, and let the child understand that needs to follow the rules and bottom lines in daily life. has a good balance between love and teaching. Relationship between.
Loving children is not an unconditional material satisfaction, nor a psychological concession.
Only by balancing the relationship between love and teaching can children grow better.
Parents love their children, nothing can be overstated. But the problem is that many parents of give their children too much love.
because of the childToo much love, so they can't bear to let their children work, can't bear to ask them, or even can't bear to refuse their unreasonable demands.
When parents give love to their children, they must also ask for love from their children in a timely manner.
Only when children feel love since childhood and know how to give to those who love, can they become loving people.
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