The story of an ordinary rural old man who sent all three brothers and sisters to college by "bragging". If you have children at home, and you happen to be exploring the issue of education, please take two minutes to read it patiently. I believe it will be very inspiring to you.
Xinxin is 40 years old this year. She has two brothers. Her mother passed away when she was 9 years old. The eldest brother became the mainstay of the family, shouldering the family's financial expenses and raising her and her second brother. Why not dad? In her memories, she seems to have some resentment towards her father.
According to her memories, her family was very poor when she was a child, so poor that even the neighbors looked down upon her. It could be said that she was the poorest family in the entire village. The mother became frail and sick because she was worried about the family and taking care of the children. Finally, she could not bear the suffering of life and the torture of illness and passed away. My father was idle all day long. He could obviously work more diligently to earn money to support the family, but he drank with others all day long and did not do his job. Xinxin said that at that time, she felt that her father was very embarrassed because he couldn't do anything, and he went around bragging and making people laugh. She said that fortunately, the three siblings did not follow their father, and all of them were relatively promising. Now they have become a "myth" that people in the village talk about after dinner.
She said that her eldest brother’s score in the high school entrance examination was far higher than that of key high schools. But at that time, technical secondary school was more recognized than high school. At that time, people believed that it was a better way out than high school and university. In addition, the family background was poor at that time, so her brother chose a After graduating from a technical secondary school, you can find employment to supplement your family income. After the news spread, all the villages in ten miles and eight villages knew that a "scholar" came from this most backward family, and from now on, all their registered residences would be in urban areas. After being employed, the eldest brother earned 2,500 a month through hard work, which was a good income at that time and place. Xinxin's family situation improved a lot.
In recent years, her eldest brother's business has been booming, with an annual income of several million, but she said that he is not very happy. He is a literary man at heart, and his grades in the high school entrance examination of the same year were much lower than his, and he is now Professor of at Tsinghua University. Xinxin said that if the eldest brother didn't have to take care of the family, he might be able to follow his heart and he should be a good scholar now. She was filled with guilt and tears in her eyes as she spoke. Then he whispered that if my father had been more diligent at that time, my mother might not have to leave so early.
I don’t know how to comfort me. I think my eldest brother and my mother are the epitome of that era. How many people eventually collapsed and lost their lives because of poverty and worry. How many people have given up their ultimate dream of raising a family because of material scarcity. Although I have not experienced that era, I can understand a lot of helplessness at that time.
Then I asked where is the second brother? She was in a better mood and said that her second brother had studied very well since he was a child and was very smart. Later, he easily got into a 211 Project University in Beijing. Then she said with some pride that both her eldest brother's technical secondary school and her and her second brother's admission to college caused a great sensation in the village. The three siblings were among the few college students in Shiliba Village who passed the exam at that time, and many villagers voted for it. The envious eyes said that there was smoke coming out of their ancestral grave. It is true that in those days, it was as rare as a panda to have a college student, not to mention that all three children of a backward rural family were admitted to college.
I am also a little curious, how on earth could an irresponsible father and a frail mother manage to send all three siblings to college so productively at that time? Xinxin smiled and said that she didn't know very well. Neither her father's family nor her mother's family had very studious people. The reason why he and his two brothers love to study is probably because of their father's boasts. I looked stunned. She smiled and said that at that time, her father would brag to everyone he met: "My children will definitely stand out in the future, and they will all be college students." When she saw a car coming into the village (at that time, seeing it in the village was as rare as seeing a panda), she was so excited about people. Said: “I will definitely drive a car like this after seeing my child."Bragging like this always happens on various occasions, but it always receives a burst of cynicism from the villagers. Even the young Xinxin feels embarrassed when she looks at it.
But Xinxin said it might be because of her father's bragging. At a young age, she was determined in her heart to be the person her father talked about. Although she still didn’t know how to get ahead and what a college student was, she What she understands is that college students must be better people, different from the people in the village. She has longed to be the person her father said she wanted to be, so she has studied hard since she was a child and must be admitted to college. So when other children are playing carefree. , she was changing her destiny by studying hard. She said that although her family was poor at that time, she was very rich spiritually. I also asked my two brothers why they studied hard at that time, and they both said that they had the influence of "bragging" with their father.
I was deep in thought. Is this really the case? Then I thought about it in reverse. , what will be the fate of the three brothers and sisters? I think it will be no different from other children in the village, even because their mother died young and their father did not work properly. Thinking of this, I not only marveled at my father’s wisdom, but he may not have understood it, but he used it and succeeded. Power.
The so-called power of suggestion has a scientific basis. Brain scientist Professor Hong Lan said, " The brain can be changed by language. It will constantly change the distribution of nerves due to external demands. " psychology calls this phenomenon " self-fulfilling prophecy ". The power of suggestion plays the most obvious role in children. Because children will regard every word spoken by their parents as their own cognition and ideas, affecting their Emotional intelligence, character development
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The power of suggestion is so terrifying. In a real program of CCTV's " Psychological Interview ", 33 years old is the age when she has a successful career and is the mainstay of the family. However, Fan Jincheng has been at home for 10 years and asked her why. Said, “They clipped my wings, but they still blamed me for not being able to fly! "It turns out that her parents have been giving her a suppressive education, and insults like "dogs can achieve things better than you" are often blurted out. Under the long-term attack from her parents, she is cowardly, has low self-esteem, and can't do anything.
There is another story, once A little boy once gave his mother a note after school and told him that it was from the teacher. The mother took out the note and read it with tears, "Your child is a genius, and this school is too small for him." A good teacher can teach him, and it is recommended that you teach him yourself. "This child is Edison . Many years later, his mother died, and Edison turned over the note from that year. It said, "Your child has a mental defect. We decided not to let him continue to study. He was officially dropped out of school. "Edison burst into tears after reading it. Later he wrote in his diary, "Edison was a mentally defective child, but his mother changed him into a genius of the century. "
It can be seen that hints are a double-edged sword. Xinxin's father must not understand these, but her words have deeply affected the three brothers and sisters. Although he is not a qualified father, his positive and optimistic attitude towards life and repeated verbal hints are It gave the three brothers and sisters a chance to change their destiny. Have a better future. I think the most important thing in education is suggestion. Negative suggestions are spiritual corrosives, and positive suggestions will become the light of life.
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