A master of Chinese studies once said that the best state of life is "the doctrine of the mean".
When it comes to "moderate", I believe many people will look down on it and think that "moderate" means being incompetent. So, everyone will go to extremes and get bleeding from the head.
In your opinion, is it better to be sociable or not? Is it better to enjoy loneliness or to get rid of loneliness?
Generally speaking, it will only be divided into two factions, either thinking that being together is better or feeling that enjoying loneliness is better. It is this extreme thinking that makes everyone's life difficult.
In fact, when we recognize this world, we will understand such a reality. When is supposed to be in a group, we cannot be alone. When we shouldn't be sociable, we need to enjoy the time alone.
It is better to look at everything "dialectically" than to go to extremes. This unbiased and "medium" attitude is particularly suitable for middle-aged and elderly people.
When you are young, you can go to extremes appropriately. This is to add to life and accumulate life experience. When I reach my middle and late years, it is time to "take a chance" , and it is important to take the middle path.
Starting from the age of 55, it is your vision to have a good relationship with these people.
1. Keep in touch with the "old guy".
Friends who have been with me for a month are passers-by; friends who have been with me for a year are also passers-by. Only friends who have been with us for more than ten years can be regarded as our close friend.
Our best attitude towards these close relationships is not to gradually alienate or get too close, but to maintain a certain connection so that the relationship can "flow for a long time".
The so-called "The friendship between gentlemen is as light as water, and the friendship between villains is as sweet as honey."
This so-called friendship between gentlemen is like flowing water. Although it gives people a "light" feeling, it lasts for a long time; although this so-called friendship between villains makes people feel sweet, it does not last for a long time.
people are old, and keeping in touch with the old guy is taking the path of "a friendship between gentlemen". You are kind to others and others care about you. Both parties support each other until they grow old. This is the embodiment of true feelings.
If you have time, just go hiking, fishing, playing chess or chatting with your old guy. Anyway, you can live your life as you want, just be moist and comfortable.
2. Stay in touch with the "noble people" who often help you.
I believe we have all met such people who suddenly appeared by our side and pulled us without hesitation to help us. People like
, we call them "noble people". Their appearance is the arrangement of fate or the manifestation of fate.
Some people may wonder why noble people appear? Why do they help us?
There is a saying that goes very well, God has the virtue of living a life. God sent these noble people to us to "send" us. For this, we should have a good relationship with it and be grateful for their help.
damage is only zero and countless times. helps this matter, and there are zero and countless times. So, it is better for the nobles who have helped us. Only when we encounter problems in the future will they help us again.
people live in the world and cannot solve everything by themselves. At this time, it is wise to make friends with noble people.
3. The conflict with "spouse" was written off.
It is said that "Rely on friends when going out, and rely on relatives at home."
The parents have left, so who else can we "rely on"? There is no doubt that it is the partner who has been with us for twenty or thirty years.
We must have such an understanding of "partner".
The companion who came halfway, we should not have too many expectations, nor should we talk to them too much. Because both parties spend too short time together and human nature is too complicated, there is no need to treat them sincerely.
And a partner who has been with him for twenty or thirty years, we should not think too much about it, be kind to them. At least, there are not many twenty or thirty years in life. Others have been with us for most of our lives, which proves that they are worthy of full trust.
Time will eventually tell us who is the "true person" and who is the "fake person". It is also a blessing given to us by God that we can meet people we love and work together until we grow old.
Don’t worry too much about your partner. Just write off the conflicts in the past. Our goal is to work together in our later years.
4. Be better with "self".
Speaking of this, many people will say, shouldn’t we “strive relationships” with our children’s descendants?
Whether children are filial to their parents is not a question of how their parents do it, but a question of whether they are filial and financially capable. If you treat your child well, he may not treat you well, and he also thinks that your goodness is "for granted".
Of course, we are not saying that all children are ruthless people. However, if children have their own family to take care of and their own life to live, they are likely to be unable to take care of their parents.
Since this is the case, should shift the focus of our attention to ourselves, be kind to ourselves, and don’t let ourselves suffer in vain.
Modern people hope to "hard" themselves and to be happy for their children and grandchildren. But they did not expect that their fathers and ancestors thought so, so every generation did not live happily enough.
Starting from the age of 55, be kind to yourself and don’t be too harsh. I think the rest of my life will show the gorgeous brilliance like the sunset.
text/Shushan Youlu
