I traveled through time and became the Taifu.
Fortunately, I traveled to the Dongliang Kingdom where women were in power.
Unfortunately, this tutor is a fucking man!
Fortunately, my emperor student is also a time traveler.
01.
I told the emperor that I want to leave the palace.
"Go out? Turn left after the toilet." The emperor's left eye twitched slightly, as if speechless.
She thought she was very humorous, haha.
Right, you read that right, it's her.
The emperor is a woman, and this is the Dongliang Kingdom where women respect.
"Emperor, I am old and want to resign and retire and return to my hometown to farm."
"If I remember correctly, the Taifu has just passed twenty-one, and it is the time to be strong?"
"I still have a strong body?"
"I still have a body In, my heart is old. "
The emperor put down the brush in his hand, tilted his head and thought about it.
"Okay, then you can leave the palace by yourself." She smiled sly, "If you can go out."
I happily left.
02.
I, Xu Mu —to be precise, it is my soul in "Xu Mu" body—from the 21st century.
Just graduated from college and took an offer from a large factory. I didn’t go to class for a day. I slept for a while and went through time in a daze.
Just wear it, and I also wear it in a country where a woman is in power.
The most terrible thing is that I am obviously a young girl in the flowery world. In this place where women are superior to men and inferior to , I finally walked into a man's body.
is a senior tutor who is younger than the emperor, that is, Xu Mu Benmu.
"I" grew up in the palace since I was a child and took over the position of Taifu, who belonged to the second generation of Taifu.
So, this year's "I" is actually four years younger than Emperor Ruan Shengzhi.
Accompanying you is like accompanying a tiger. After thinking about it, I should still escape from this place as soon as possible and make plans.
So I have the saying of resigning to the emperor.
"I" have never been out of the palace, but I think it will be difficult to get out of a building.
Two hours later, I found myself still too naive.
I stood in front of the emperor again, panting: "Damn, you are a female domineering president, the villa covers an area of 100,000 acres."
Yes, it's embarrassing to say that this palace is too big, not only I don't have it I was able to get out and got lost. In the end, Xiao Jia, the close maid next to the emperor, took back Jinluan Palace .
The blisters all walked out of my feet, so I couldn't help but curse.
Unexpectedly, Ruan Shengzhi was not only not angry, but his left eye was twitching even more violently.
"Does Xu Taifu have a nickname?"
"What?"
"Submitted to Ma, is Lisu ." She thought for a while and added, "No, it should be the surname Jie and Csu."
I was shocked, and my surprise made me unable to help stomp my feet and stomp the blisters on the soles of my feet.
Damn-it hurts so much!
"Damn! It hurts and hurts." I sat on the ground, hugged my feet and exhaled, with my posture quite indecent, "You too...!"
Ruan Sheng's eyes were filled with tears, and shook the steps on his head. The bead hairpin was jingling: "I'm!"
Now, the fellow villagers were crying when they saw the fellow villagers.
03.
Ruan Shengzhi asked Xiao A and Xiao B to retreat, wanting to hug me and cry for a while.
"No, lord, we must have one of us stay here." Xiao Jia and Xiao Yi said firmly, and he refused her with a look of death.
I couldn't help but feel a little admiration: "Does the maids here dare to resist the ruling class so much? Their thoughts are really progressive."
"Fart!" Ruan Shengzhi was so angry that his teeth were itchy. Two red clouds rose from his beautiful face, like the peach petals blooming on the branches in early spring, looking very tight.
Such a face that has attracted all beings, but has become the emperor without being a courtesan. It is a pity. I regret this celestial figure in my heart.
"They are afraid that I will commit suicide!" Ruan Shengzhi was still angry.
"Ha?"
She waved her hand and asked the two maids to stand farther-although they could still see our figures, but they could not hear the distance between us.
"I tried suicide many times to go back, but I was rescued." She was also next to me and sat on the ground, "Can you put down your stinky feet first?"
I smelled it, it was not smelly. ah.
This young lady has a bad temper, but I still obediently put down my feet.
She opened the high collar lining and there was a circle of purple that was faintly visible, which should be the traces left by attempted hanging.
raised his left hand again and rolled up his cuffs. There was a three or four centimeter-long scar that had already formed a scab, like an black snake entrenched on her white wrist.
She pointed to Xiao A and Xiao B in the distance: "So now those ministers are afraid that I will seek suspicion again. They sent two dead soldiers to crowdfund them and stared at me for 24 hours, which is stricter than surveillance."
This operation is really a fierce woman! I admire it so much that I am overwhelmed.
"Awesome." I gave her a thumbs up with both hands, "Then why are you still here?"
"Has it been rescued every time!" She supported her face with her hands and elbows. He pressed his knees, looking worried, "It seems that this road is not working."
"But now, I know you have traveled through time." She was happy again and patted my shoulder, "At least," I am not the only one who is so unlucky, I feel relieved a lot. "
...
I really thank you.
In order to express our welcome to me, a "membersman", Ruan Shengzhi gave me ten acres of wasteland in my back garden that day, saying, "Since you can't go back to your hometown to farm, just plant it in the palace."
is a total of ten basketball courts. This is not just about growing vegetables, it is clearly necessary to develop agricultural greenhouses.
04.
As two time travelers who share the same illness, I and I have a mutual appreciation between Ruan Sheng and , and we are together every day.
I instructed Xiao A and Xiao B to make a deck of playing cards with wood and a deck of Sichuan mahjong. Four people gathered together to enjoy the fun if they had something to do.
I did not disappoint the ground that Ruan Shengzhi gave me. I planted some scallions, garlic seedlings, , water spinach, , and prepared to have a harvest in the future and make some modern dishes to eat.
The dishes cooked by the imperial chef here are really bland and tasteless, and what's more excessive is that they can't even make the recipes given.
Fortunately, the small dessert produced is not bad, I like it very much.
So everything depends on myself, so I developed a basic planting industry in this palace.
Yunnan people also built a dark room near the wall to cultivate mushrooms, which is very pleasant.
All of my performances that seem to be "woman" because of a girl's soul. In the eyes of Dongliang , the harmony that the Chinese people cannot describe is also an unexpected surprise.
Just this day, Ruan Shengyi gave the civil and military officials seven days off abnormally, saying that he didn't have to go to court and rest at home.
Even when I went to find her, Xiao Jia was blocked at the door and told the emperor that he wanted to be alone and quiet. What to do with
? Is it because I have acne and rotten my face, and I’m embarrassed to meet people?
I have experience with this, so I pushed open the door of the bedroom despite Xiao Jia's obstruction.
"Your Majesty, I have a way to deal with acne." While pushing the door, I shouted into the palace.
When I got closer, I realized that Ruan Shengzhi was sitting upright on the luxurious bed carved by walnut . Although his face was a little unnatural, it was still as smooth as jade.
I reached out and touched it. Isn’t it the same as the newly peeled egg.
Ruan Shengzhi blushed and twisted his upper body awkwardly to one side, but his butt didn't move at all, like a twisted flower that had just been out of the pot.
"What are you doing? If you have something to say, don't touch me."
are all girls, why are you so shy?
Then she thought, it was wrong, she probably thought I was a man too.
Ruan Shengzhi won’t think I’m taking advantage of her, right! That would be a big misunderstanding!
I was about to explain, but I found that the person sitting on the bed twisted his thighs uncomfortably, and his face became more and more serious.
"You go, I'll look for you in a few days." She waved impatiently.
"What's wrong with you?" I asked with some concern and took a step forward.
"Don't come here!" She stood up and stopped me loudly.
There was a small ball of fresh blood on the bed, and it seemed that it had already seeped down.
is that?
"Are you here?"
"Yes!" She looked at the blood, looked at me again, her face turned pale, and she kept cursing, "Although you are a sissy, you are a silly after all, Men, of course I don’t understand.”
is not, why do you still call me "sissy"?
She had never said the truth before...
Although my soul is essentially a woman, I still have a little heart.
However, girls during menstruation tend to have a bad temper, and as a person who has experienced it, I fully understand it.
is just her next sentence, and I can't understand it any more.
"I used to be a straight man in steel. How could I have such trouble? It's like a mountain torrent, and my blood flows non-stop."
, etc. !
"You..." I raised my fingers and pointed at her tremblingly: "Your core is a man?"
"What, no!" He rolled up his sleeves and forked his waist, and threw his jar. But the girl's appearance looks unique.
"Don't think of taking advantage of me, I was like you in my previous life, and I was also a man with me."
I was in tears: "No, but I am a woman in it."
"Ah?" Ruan Shengzhi was also stunned. .
05.
We looked at each other and sat in chaos on the big bed. Even if she sat down again on the bloodstain, she forgot to remind her.
The amount of information is really a bit large and it takes time to digest it.
We traveled through time and went to a place where women were superior to men, and their gender was inverted.
It’s really God is going to kill me!
Just when we were both speechless, Ruan Shengzhi frowned and cursed, "Damn it."
"What's wrong?"
She, it's him now.
He pursed his lips and finally replied awkwardly: "Blood... is flowing out again."
Then I realized why I came to him at the beginning.
"You don't go to court because you came to my aunt?"
"Then I can't go to court with a lot of blood on my clothes, right?" He grabbed his hair irritably, "There is not even a sanitary napkin here. It's so annoying."
It's strange that it has sanitary napkins.
However, there is nothing you can make your own!
"Xiao Jia," I called Xiao Jia to my side, "Go and get some cotton and cotton cloth with delicate texture."
Xiao Jia responded and left.
"What are you doing?" Ruan Shengyi looked suspicious.
"Help you make a sanitary napkin to solve your bleeding incident.”
"Can you fucking do this yourself?" His incredible voice almost overturned the roof. I just felt eardrum buzzing.
Xiao Jia's movements were very fast, and in just a few minutes, he came back with a large basket of cotton and a roll of cotton cloth.
I took out the scissors and started cutting it. I slightly compacted the cotton, kneaded it into a ball and stuffed it in, and then sewed the fine stitches on both sides.
"Take it off." I held the homemade auntie towel in my hand and waved it to Ruan Shengzhi.
"Here? Are you sick?"
His face suddenly turned red, and I seemed to be able to see the white smoke above my head.
I realized that there was something wrong with the magic sound. Then maybe I could "flow into a river" on the spot.
I couldn't help but shivered just by imagining it.
"Little Ar," I had to call Xiao Ar, who was standing in the distance again, "Go and get a clean pair of underwear for the emperor."
The temperature on Ruan Shengzhi's face had not faded, and his eyes were staring at me tightly. Maybe I was thinking, it was time to let me continue or just drag me out and behead me.
New problems come together with underwear.
I can't stick my homemade auntie towel on...
"No, forget it, I really don't want to discuss this topic anymore." Ruan Shengzhi collapsed on the bed with his fate, like a doll whose soul was drained.
"After all, you are a big man, why do you have menstrual shame? You have to change your thoughts."
I was flipping through the underwear in my hand while educating him.
Suddenly, I am blessed to my heart, just make pajama pants!
I am such a clever little ghost. I gave a thumbs up for my wisdom in my heart.
"What is pajama pants ?"
"You don't understand, good stuff."
I sent Xiao Jia again and asked her to find the most powerful Embroidered in the palace.
After all, this thing is a bit difficult and I have a specialized career, so I still have to find a professional person to do it.
"Can you let me go? Am I not embarrassed enough? You have to let other men know that I am the aunt!" I could feel Ruan Shengzhi's choking.
"Okay, okay, Xiaojia, change the embroidery lady to the emperor, you must have a girl."
06.
Embroidery lady came very quickly. She is an elderly aunt. She looks experienced and it should be no problem to make pajama pants. .
"I've met the emperor."
Ruan Shengzhi was already disgusted with shame and anger, pulled down the bed curtain and was lying on the bed pretending to be dead.
The embroiderer knelt on the ground and did not dare to move.
I quickly stepped forward and helped her up and briefly explained my request.
is probably to make a new one based on the clean underwear on your hand, two layers, stuff cotton in the middle, and breathe a little more.
Embroiderer is indeed a capable person. She understands it with her left hand scissors and needles and threads in her right hand. After a while, a simple version of pajama pants came out.
"Your Majesty, why don't you give it a try?" I shouted tentatively to the bed.
"I don't want to try, I just want to die."
As soon as this said, the embroidered woman was so scared that she knelt down again: "Master, I can't do it."
Xiao A and Xiao B also arrived in an instant The curtain was opened in front of the bed.
"The Emperor."
Ruan Sheng looked at us desperately, and a drop of tears flowed from the corners of his eyes.
"Try it, if it's not good, I won't bother again." I raised my right hand and stretched out three fingers, "I swear, believe me this time."
He stared at me, his eyes were watered because of tears. Wool, especially clear.
Damn, I feel like I'm going to bend, and I feel tight and look away.
Ruan Shengzhi got up with his fate, and I asked Xiao A and Xiao B to help him clean his body, and then put on simple pajama pants.
When he came back, his face was full of red again, even the tips of his ears were covered with pink.
Two big eyes flashed and walked over with a hesitant step: "It's quite good, thank you."
The embroiderer heard this and couldn't help but praise me, "I didn't expect to be a sensible tutor. Lord has such ingenious thoughts. I wonder if my maid can promote it in the palace? "
"Of course, it's best to promote it out of the palace so that all women in the world can benefit."
"The Grand Tutor is kind and kind. "The embroidered lady gave me a deep blessing.
"Not hindrance, it's just that the emperor is polite and cares for women all over the world. Girls help girls."
"What?" The embroidered lady looked confused.
I waved my hand: "It's nothing, I just need to help each other."
"No, no, no." Ruan Shengzhi waved his hand anxiously to stop it, "Don't say I thought it out, I can't afford to lose this person. . ”
hehe, man.
He accidentally stepped on the hem of the skirt mopping the floor, his feet staggered and fell straight to the bed.
I quickly reached out to help, but he pulled it and fell on the bed.
His face was right in front of me, his lips were almost pressed together, and a warm breath squirted on each other's faces.
My face began to get hot, my heart beat faster, and I stuttered: "Then, why not, just call it, Xiaojia brand pajama pants?"
He also answered "Okay".
The embroiderer received the order, and Xiao A and B put down the curtain again "concertically" and left me in the tent.
07.
I looked at "her" face, my almond eyes were slightly flat, my eyelashes were flapping like butterflies' wings, making a small shadow, my nose was small, my lips were beautiful, and the corners of my mouth were slightly upturned.
is completely the perfect plastic surgery template for female celebrities.
"You look so good." We both spoke in unison.
"Do you like men/women?" We both spoke in unison again.
"Fart." It's God-sync again.
I hurriedly sat up with my hands, facing the head of the bed, biting my lip, and secretly regretted it in my heart.
Damn, can I really bend?
The most feared thing is that the air suddenly quiets.
"That, let's discuss something with you." He coughed.
"What's the matter?"
"You turn around first."
I slowly moved over and faced him, and the remaining warmth on my face had not yet faded.
He was not much better, his face was still covered in pink: "How about you be Fengjun for me?"
Explain that Fengjun is the queen of the feudal dynasty.
"Ha?"
He grabbed his hair with some shyness: "Those ministers shouted every day that I wanted me to favor the harem, and it was full of branches and leaves. I really couldn't stand it."
I thought about that picture-a inner space Xin is a "weak woman" of a straight man in the steel, but the harem is full of handsome men - she couldn't help but laugh out loud.
He was not angry either, but his frowning brows showed that it was really troubled: "I am a big man, how could I be given to so many men..."
"Then what's the use of finding me?"
"We When the two of them were performing a loving scene, they would block their mouths first. "
"Isn't it suitable?" I remembered the ambiguous smell of lying on the bed just now, and felt a little indescribable.
This article comes from Zhihu
"Dressing into a Tai Fu" has been completed
