For a long time,
has a problem that has always troubled us.
that is the consumption and management of emotions.
avoids internal mental consumption, pursues emotional stability, and maintains a sense of relaxation. The views and discussions of such emotions are endless.
, but most of them have been after reading it, and it played a role at that time. What should we do afterwards?
So, the problem is,
. Is there no unchanging underlying law in emotions? understands these rules, will emotional management be greatly improved, instead of relying on others' methods every day.
summarized the following articles based on a large number of psychology books and rules, as well as practical experience, which can be used for your reference. is full of practical information, so read patiently.
01
Emotion is a kind of psychological energy, and it can be divided into high and low, and the consumption and acquisition methods are also different.
psychoanalytic school master Freud first proposed the concept of psychological energy .
Psychological energy is like the battery in a mobile phone, which will continuously consume energy as it runs,
And emotions are the most direct embodiment of psychological energy.
energy itself, both high and low,
Some people seem to be born full of energy,
This is the kind of high-energy people we call. They are generally more outgoing and full of vitality;
Some people have lower energy, quieter and introverted, and prone to decadence;
There is no difference between the high and bad energy itself,
is like a mobile phone, not the better the battery, the better the mobile phone is.
Different people have different ways of consumption.
For introverts, being alone and quiet are the main ways to obtain energy.
Excessive socialization and socializing will greatly consume energy;
Extraverts are the opposite. Being alone will feel bored and consumed, while
Socializing and having fun will make them feel happy.
is like a battery. After consumption, everyone has their own charging mode.
's emotional stability and balance, and the most important thing is to find a suitable charging mode for yourself.
02
Emotion is a kind of spiritual entropy, which requires order and anti- entropy increase .
Mental entropy is the founder of positive psychology mihali , a concept proposed in "Flow: Optimal Experience Psychology",
This concept uses the entropy in thermodynamics to express the spirit,
Simply put, Entropy is the mix of spirit or emotions There is a basic rule for entropy, that is, the principle of entropy increase , , that is, , without external interference, a system will automatically tend to be in a state of chaos,
, so you can realize that even if you don’t do anything for a day,
What you feel is not necessarily mental pleasure, is more likely to be boredom and pain.
Therefore, if you want to achieve emotional stability,
can start from two aspects.
One aspect is to make yourself feel orderly and control.
Less means more. The simpler your life is, the lower your emotional chaos will be.
The more orderly your life is, the more stable your emotions will be;
Another aspect is to increase the anti-entropy.
Exercise is to increase the body's anti-entropy, breaking the entropy increase of one's own through external forces.
Anti-entropy increase of emotions is mainly by removing negative emotions and inputting more positive forces.
In fact, we often say that A person has few emotions and stable emotions. Most of the time, this person has very low spiritual entropy and very orderly heart.
Of course, if you can reach the so-called flow state , you will completely forget yourself, forget time, and focus on things themselves, and believe that you will naturally get a very good experience and emotions.
03
3 System 1 or System 2, it is important to resist the first step.
The famous psychologist Daniel Kahneman In "Thinking, Fast and Slow " mentioned that
The human brain has two reaction systems, system 1 is called quick thinking, is also , that is, l3 does not have brain power - fast - unconscious - difficult to control thinking, just like autonomous driving,
system 2 is called slow thinking, means attention-burdening - labor-consuming system - slow - logical thinking.
has no distinction between the two systems, and the situation is also different.
Generally speaking, the girls' system 1 is relatively developed. The intuitive feeling and psychological effects caused by
System 1 includes
halo effect, first impression, peak experience, anchoring psychology, etc., halo effect, first impression, peak experience, anchoring psychology, etc. 2 Therefore, you will find that girls generally pay more attention to feelings, especially the first impression, , and girls are easily affected by the halo effect , , boys are relatively more concerned about feelings, but they will use System 2 more than girls and are more rational. This difference is caused by the evolution of men and women, different social roles and division of labor. System 1 is actually the most intuitive expression of emotions.
Therefore, most girls' emotions are born more than boys, and they are unstable. There is no difference between good and bad in this book.
The problem is that if you want to have stable emotions, instead of emotions that fluctuate greatly every day, the best way for
is, when you face things, try to be as good as possible. Use System 1 less,
When facing bad things, if you can control the first time of upset reaction and turn to think with System 2,
believe that you will soon be in a state of chaos and have a stable mood.
Because most emotional problems are because you do not control the negative emotional reaction at the first time,
resist the first time, and the emotions behind will naturally not be much.
can't withstand it, and sometimes it will plummet.
04
Emotional inner and external consumption forms.
Emotional consumption is undoubtedly an extremely important component in emotional management.
It is necessary to avoid excessive mental insemination.
There are many common forms of emotional insemination, mainly including self-negation, indecision and depression.
People who often deny themselves are undoubtedly the most consumed themselves.
people like
, no Every time the result is good or bad, you will deny yourself. If it is bad, you will criticize yourself. OK, saying that you are not doing enough, you will blame yourself.
And every self-negation is a process of killing one's own heart ;
hesitation and choosing people in difficulties is also a high disaster area for mental internal friction.
A or B?
is hesitating, swaying, hesitating once, consuming ;
The depressed consumption method is often difficult for others to see from the outside, but it will be very uncomfortable in itself.
Depression is mostly caused by depression, although there is no difference to outsiders,
People who often suppress themselves are mostly caused by their original families, and their needs are not met or cared for.
every time they suppress, it is self-consuming.
The key to internalizing emotions is to avoid thinking too much and being a real self.
thinks more and feels uncomfortable, the more real you are, the easier you live.
External consumption of emotions often comes from external negative news and negative interpersonal interactions.
A good way to avoid bad emotions is to stay away from negative news.
, especially in the Internet era, good things don’t go out, bad things spread thousands of miles;
Negative interactions are very consuming, especially when in love. You must stay away from those who only consume you.
Try to get close to those who give you energy, actively interact and nourish you.
The basic rules of emotions end here,
may have many other rules,
But the above rules are basically unchanged, practical and have been tried and tested,
As the saying goes, the way is simple, it will be repeated over and over again,
hope it will be helpful to you.
This is the evergreen growth path. If you think it is good, remember to like and follow Yo[grin]
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