Lord
Please give me peace and accept things that I cannot change
Please give me courage to change things that I can change
and give me wisdom to understand the difference between the two
1: Can human nature change
1) Human nature cannot change
Human nature cannot change, but can guide. We have some instincts and some desires, they are inherent and cannot be changed, and they are like what they are. Our defects are inevitable and cannot be changed. Whether good or bad, we can only accept defects. But instead of surrendering, they guided. Guide the development of flawed and imperfect human nature in the better direction
In the history of philosophy, people who believe that human nature is restricted, including Hamilton, Adam Smith, , Fredrick Kayak, etc., these people believe that " Our nature is restricted and has limited ". Edmund Burke said that the most accurate explanation of this view is the words of bacon , " means nature, and you must abide by nature ". French philosopher politician Benjamin Constant said, " fate calls us to improve ourselves ."
2) Human nature can change
Human nature can be improved and can be changed, depending on whether we go to . Their goal is to change human nature, improve it, and make it better.
Philosophers dedicated to this include Thomas Jefferson, Rousseau , Bernard Shaw , Dworkin and other outstanding thinkers. People who hold their own opinions that are not restricted by nature tend to utopianism or communism, let us change the nature of human beings.
2: Actively accept
2.1: Viewpoint
I believe that human nature cannot change . Human nature is inherent, we have desires, we have the instinct of being born , or given by God or formed in evolution over millions of years. These natures will not change quickly, and it is impossible in life, it is inherent. For better or worse, we must accept them. After accepts this nature, the only thing we can do is to first understand it, and after understanding it, make good use of it.
In today's culture, we are not allowed to accept ourselves and do not experience the freedom to experience painful emotions. , but there are only two types of people who experience the continuous happiness and will not experience painful emotions, such as anger, jealousy, disappointment, sadness, unhappiness, depression or occasional anxiety. and the other type are mentally ill , so they will not feel painful emotions. The second category of people who have no pain are experienced by dead people.
2.2: Case
1) Child birth experience
When our eldest son was born, the doctor came to check my wife's condition and check the baby's condition. For some reason, he didn't ask about my situation. Everything was normal, as he walked out of the room, he turned around and said, "There is one more thing. In the next few months, you will experience every emotion, the ultimate emotion. That's okay, it's natural, we have all experienced ." Then he walked out, which was the best advice his wife and I got about raising children.
Why? A month later, I began to develop an occasional jealousy towards David because it was the first time someone was stuck in the middle after my wife was with me and the other got more attention than I did. No matter how I cried, I was jealous of him, and then five minutes later, I developed the strongest love for him, an emotion I had never felt before. Usually I would think, "What a hypocrite, something is wrong, I am full of jealousy the previous minute, and I feel endless love in the blink of an eye?" This is completely reasonable and completely correct, and this is part of being a human being.
Because I have the advice of a pediatrician in my mind, accepts self-.
We need a place where we accept ourselves unconditionally, which can be the people we care about when we are with our close friends, and the most important thing is that when we face ourselves, we allow ourselves to cry and be happy.
2) Don't think about pink elephant
DanielWegner has done research on "iron processing", When we suppress a natural phenomenon, that phenomenon will only strengthen.
I used an experiment to explain it. Don't think about pink elephant for the next ten seconds.
What is the truth? Most people will think of pink elephants. Because when we try to suppress a natural phenomenon, such as when we mention a word, it will only strengthen it, suppresses natural pain and also has this effect .
3) Jealousy
Because of my previous experience, I was jealous of my best friend. That emotion itself does not mean that I am a bad person, it is human nature. I have never met anyone without jealousy. Maybe the Dalai Lama can. If the Dalai Lama really has no desires and no desires, it will also be the result of decades of practice.
Jealousy is a part of human nature. There is no difference between good and bad jealousy, no difference between good and bad anger, and no difference between depression and anxiety. That is a part of human nature. The question is, what kind of behavior should I choose to express my emotions in ? Morality is involved here, and I can choose moral and immoral behavior . I will still be jealous of my best friend, but choose to be tolerant and kind to him.
4) Painful emotions
We will talk about contemplation frequently. In fact, contemplation of painful emotions is not much helpful. Writing descriptions is more helpful, and contributing to others is more helpful. , but I always think about how miserable it is to be dumped by my girlfriend. I haven’t found a new goal in a fast food restaurant yet.
2.3: Conclusion
Emotion cannot be changed. It is important to face reality in reality. Emotions that agree with painful emotions are composed of human nature, just like beautiful emotions.
The difference between extremely happy people and extremely unhappy people is not that one will be sad, sad, anxious or depressed, while the other will not, both types of people will do it. The difference between is how quickly and quickly they can recover from their pain .
Many students may have read this poem and heard of it. It explains the basis of actively accepting the meaning very well. "Lord, please give me peace and accept things that I cannot change, please give me courage to change things that I can change, and give me wisdom to understand the difference between the two."
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