Text/Sun Yanyi (Shandong)
People often say that people cannot be judged by their appearance, and sea water cannot be measured. This sentence could not be more appropriate to apply to Mrs. Ruan of Xu Yun.
According to the records of Three Kingdoms, Xu Yun has a close relationship with Li Feng, Xia Houxuan and others. Later, Li Feng and others planned to depose Sima Shi. Sima Shi noticed and killed Li Feng. According to historical records, Xu Yun was also involved and was killed because of the incident.
What I want to talk about here are the interesting stories left by Xu Yun and his wife Ruan. According to the records in "Wei's Spring and Autumn Annals", the relationship between Xu Yun and his wife went through a lot of twists and turns. Ruan is the daughter of Weiwei Ruan Gong. Although she is talented and knowledgeable, her appearance is not good. On the wedding day, Xu Yun took off the hijab and took a look and was very dissatisfied. After combined with , I no longer wanted to go back to the bridal chamber. Ruan asked her maid to quietly see where the groom had gone. The maid came back and said, "We are receiving a guest from Fan." Ruan said, "This person must be a famous scholar Huan Fan . Huan Fan will definitely persuade the groom to come back." Sure enough, Huan Fan heard Xu Yun complaining about the bride. When Zi Chou was young, he thought that the Ruan family must have their own reasons for marrying their daughter even though they knew she was not beautiful. They persuaded Xu Yun not to be impulsive and to have a good chat with the bride. Xu Yun thought it made sense and went back to the new house. But when he saw that the bride was really ugly, he immediately stood up and wanted to leave. Ruan knew that if he let him go this time, the marriage would probably end here. So, she stood up, grabbed his collar, and asked him to sit down first. After that, the two had a very classic conversation.
Faced with Xu Yun's accusation that "women have four virtues, and ministers have several others", Ruan was neither humble nor arrogant, and answered calmly, thinking that she "lacked only capacity" and had no other shortcomings. Next, she asked Xu Yun: "A scholar has hundreds of behaviors, how many do you have?" When she heard Xu Yun's brazen claim that "they have them all", she further asked: "The hundreds of behaviors of a scholar are headed by virtue, you are lustful but not If you love virtue, how can you dare to say that you have everything you need? After hearing these words, Xu Yun felt deeply ashamed and knew that Ruan was extraordinary.
Ruan's extraordinary wisdom and insight soon played an important role, not only helping Xu Yun resolve a serious political crisis, but also allowing Xu Yun to skillfully reverse the situation and truly turn crisis into safety and opportunity. . Xu Yun served as the official, an important position responsible for selecting officials. Soon, Xu Yun had a big problem. According to "Wei's Spring and Autumn Annals", when Xu Yun chose the county governor, " Emperor Ming suspected that he had been used inappropriately, so he summoned him and he would be punished." "Shishuo Xinyu" recorded that Xu Yun "used his hometown more, Emperor Wei Ming sent Hu Ben to collect it." These two records say that Xu Yun did not follow legal procedures when selecting officials, and that Xu Yun liked to promote fellow villagers. In short, the emperor believed that Xu Yun had made mistakes in selecting officials, and determined that he had not been fair and impartial, and wanted to take him into custody. condemn. Xu Yun was so panicked for a moment when he heard the news. Mrs. Ruan told him: "The master can argue with reason, but it's hard to beg for mercy." After his daughter-in-law's advice, Xu Yun suddenly understood. When faced with the emperor's questioning, Xu Yun indeed acted confidently and defended with reason, successfully dispelling the emperor's doubts and winning back the emperor's trust. Moreover, the emperor saw that "the clothes were allowed to be ruined, and the imperial edict was given to give new clothes." Xu Yun not only cleared his name, but also came back with a new set of clothes.
When Xu Yungang was taken away this time, the whole family panicked and cried. Ruan was calm and reassured everyone not to worry too much, saying that Xu Yun would be back soon and had rice porridge waiting for her. After a while, Xu Yun was indeed released. Ruan's sobriety and calmness are admirable, and this sobriety and calmness depend precisely on his wisdom and insight. Although Xu Yun holds a high official position, he is obviously far inferior to his daughter-in-law in these aspects.
"Wei's Spring and Autumn Annals" also records another story. Xu Yun "was later executed by King Jing. His disciples came in and sued his wife. The woman was in trouble, but her expression did not change, saying: 'I knew you earlier.'’ The disciple wanted to hide his son, but the woman said, ‘I didn’t foresee anything happening to my son. ’ Later, he moved to the tomb. King Jing sent Zhonghui to see if he could match his father’s talents and virtues, and he should be accepted. The son spoke the language to his mother, and the mother replied: "Although you are good, you don't have many talents. If you open your mind and talk to each other, you will have no worries. There is no need to be extremely sad. It will stop as soon as you can." How many times can I ask about the affairs of the court? ’ The son followed. Knowing how to rebel against one's orders, and being prepared to respond accordingly, so as to avoid disaster, are all taught by one's mother. "
From this story, we can understand that the Ruan family had obviously anticipated the consequences of her husband's involvement in the political struggle. When Zhong Hui was sent by Sima Shi to see the talents and performance of Xu Yun's two sons, Ruan told her children clearly: Although you have certain talents, you have not reached the level of excellence that makes Master Sima feel worried or threatened, so you don’t need to deliberately hide anything in your words and deeds, just communicate with Zhong Hui as usual. As expected, the two children got through the difficulties smoothly according to what their mother said. Even "Wei Shi Chun Qiu" lamented that "although they have learned a lesson, they have lost the wisdom of a wise woman."
Note: The picture comes from the Internet
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