1 I have never known what I like to grow up so old. It was not until I met you later that I realized that you can’t take such a thing.
2 I have always disliked others asking me too private questions. A stranger just asked me where I went? I said I don’t care about you! Then he was driven out of the taxi.
3 I picked up a mobile phone today and wanted to give it back to the owner, so I found the owner's sister's number from the phone and called it. After the other party answered, he asked, "Brother, what's the matter?" I said, "Are you the sister of the owner of this mobile phone? I picked up your brother's phone!" After hearing this, she said, "Oh, wait a moment." Then she hung up the phone. About a minute later, the phone rang. As soon as I answered, a female voice came from: "Brother, your phone number has been found!"
4 The buddy was hospitalized due to excessive drinking, so I visited with a gift.
Brother: It’s noon soon, stay for a meal before leaving?
Me: No need...
Brother: There is nothing to be entertained...Waiter~Ah no.Nurse~A dozen glucose !! !
5 A beautiful female colleague, her husband brought her lunch, and left without saying a word.
The new male colleague asked: Who was that just now? She replied: Takeaway. Xinlai asked again: Why didn’t you pay? She said: No need to give it, just accompany him tonight. The male colleague was silent. The next day, he brought her four dishes and one soup lunch, and the whole office laughed loudly... After the final exam of
6, the teacher criticized me for not doing well in the exam in class. She said, "Class ××, why did you get such a little score? You have seriously dragged our class down."
I was puzzled after hearing this, so I raised my hand and asked, "Teacher, our class is not a pig, so I still have to share the front and back?"
7 Xiao Ming wrote an essay to the teacher.
Due to the sloppy handwriting, the teacher looked up and down, and looked left and right, but he couldn't recognize a single word.
So the teacher wrote in the comment: It looks quite like a prescription, it is a material for being a doctor.
8 "Miss, your surname is?"
"Ba."
"Oh, eight of eight?"
"No, it's Ba Jin's Ba."
"This kid, you're stupid in reading. Eight eights and eight jin of eight are not the same eight!"
9 always feels that the smell of the stinky tofu that just came to the company's door has smelled, but I just can't remember it.
Until that day, my colleague and I went to the door to do business, and it happened to be the stinky tofu put into the pot, and the smell suddenly floated over.
Just as I was about to recall this smell, my colleague turned around and shouted at me: "Did you take off your shoes?
10 lying in the hospital and hung a drip bottle, and was teased by the patient: "Look at you, you are already fat, and you will become fatter as soon as you inject. "
Just happened to be the nurse checking in the room, and joining in the fun without much trouble, he said casually: "Well, it's like water-filled ..."
me...
11 I remembered that I accidentally found a photo of a girl about thirteen years old before. She fell in love at first sight, and thought that she would find a partner in the future. She took the photo and watched it for a long time. Suddenly my mother came into the house and saw me looking at the photo, and said to me: "Why are you looking at the photos when I was a child? "
12 When I was a child, I watched TV with my dad and my mom at home. My parents had some quarrels and slowly turned into a quarrel. Suddenly, my mom slapped me on the head and said, "What are you doing if you don't go to take a shower?" Then one of my dad's slippers flew over and shouted, "I'm smoking to death." Then my mom turned around and asked my dad, "He smoked? My dad said yes! Then, the two started to mix doubles. I always thought I bought peanut oil for free.
13 One day, Tang Monk and his disciple encountered monsters as usual.
The monster showed off his unique skills as soon as it appeared. Without saying a word, he smashed the stones on the ground with a bang.
Wukong went up and knocked the monster to the ground.
Tang Monk: "Amitabha, why did you hit it?" "
Wukong said aggrievedly: "It was it that beat my mom first! ”
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