Look at your wallet and savings and just cry. 2. Going to buy steamed buns, she opened her mouth and said: "Boss, bring me a bag of cages..." 7. When we first got engaged, one day, she called me: My parents are going to harvest wheat, and soon there will be no one at home. You kn

1When life doesn’t go your way, don’t panic. Look at your wallet and savings and just cry.

2 went to buy steamed buns and said: "Boss, bring me a pack of cages..." The boss was stunned and asked me, "What fillings do you want for the cages..."

3 hired a new waiter. When he introduced himself, he said that his dream since he was a child was to be a waiter. Later, the new guy resigned after working for one morning!

asked the newcomer: Isn’t your dream to be a waiter?

The new guy replied: Yes!

She asked again: Then why did you resign?

Newcomer: Because the dream has come true!

4 When I first started working, I was carrying coffee on the elevator, but I didn’t hold it steady and the coffee spilled on the skirt of a beautiful woman in the company.

I panicked, and the beauty turned around, and I quickly said: "I'm sorry!"

The beauty ignored me and hit the handsome guy next to me on the chest with her small fist: "It's all your fault. You bumped into someone else's coffee. Do you have a tissue? Wipe it for me..."...

Hey, I did something wrong, don't I have to take responsibility?

5 There was a couple who quarreled and wanted to break up, but both parties were reluctant to let go, so they agreed to walk a hundred steps each and make up if they could still see each other when they looked back. They walked 9 steps and turned back together, but they broke up in the end.

God’s reply: The smog is really scary!

6 My nephew just refuses to eat. After the sister-in-law pressed her again and again, the nephew hesitated and said, "I'm very full. I helped Xiao Min eat her meal at the kindergarten at noon, and she promised to let me kiss her." The sister-in-law scolded her with a straight face: "You are not allowed to help others eat anymore!" The nephew said helplessly: "But, I have to help her eat this month, and I couldn't help but kiss a lot today."

7 When we first got engaged, one day, she called me: My parents are going to harvest wheat, and soon there will be no one at home. You know~~ I rode my motorcycle and drove all the way. …………

When I rushed to her house, her parents had not left. After helping them pack up, my girlfriend actually sat on the tricycle.

Me: You are going too.

Girlfriend: You are all going. Didn’t I tell you on the phone? There will be no one at home in a while. Are you getting in the car or following behind on a motorcycle? You have to help load the car.

8 When I went to Dalian after graduating from high school, I took the green train for a day and a night. A friend of mine on the bunk bed slept for a whole day and night without drinking, eating or pooping. I wondered if he was dead... Fortunately, during the ticket check, he extended a hand and gave me the ticket. I still don't distinguish between male and female...

9 once took a bus and happened to stand next to a gray-haired old lady (the old lady was sitting). I don't know why she was very sleepy at the time. She fell asleep standing up and hit her head on the old lady's head. Then she woke up from the pain. She continued to sleep, hit her head, and woke up from the pain again. After repeating this action n times, the old lady stood up on crutches and said... Girl, you can sleep sitting down, I can't bear it! I will never forget grandma’s aggrieved look! ! !

10 I went to Yunnan for a trip. I was blind and went with the wrong tour guide. I spent a day playing with others. Finally, I returned to the hotel room of the group. I realized that this was not the point. The point was that one of the members of the group was no longer there. The tour guide said: They are really two prides...

11 Husband: "Wife, tell the truth, did you marry me because I am good-looking?"

Wife: "You are good-looking? How are you good-looking?"

Husband: "Why don't you admit it? You praised me yesterday."

Wife: "When did I praise you yesterday?"

Husband: "You said I was in vain, but didn't you praise me for my good looks?"

12 went on a trip with his best friend, and rested under a tree when he was tired. Suddenly a few drops of bird poop landed on my face. Before I could react, my best friend helped me spread it evenly. She said, "Your sunscreen is not evenly applied..."