1 Are there any scumbags? I want to fall in love with you, and hope that your sweet words will coax me into being crazy. Then you cheat on me, and I will be heartbroken. From then on, I will work hard and reach the top of my life. 2 I never like strangers asking me personal quest

1 Are there any scumbags out there? I want to fall in love with you, and hope that your sweet words will coax me into being crazy. Then you cheat on me, and I will be heartbroken. From then on, I will work hard and reach the top of my life.

2 I never like strangers asking me privacy questions. Today, someone I didn’t know asked me where I was going. I said: It’s none of your business? Then he kicked me out of the taxi.

3 My ex-girlfriend is from the Northeast. One year during the Chinese New Year, I went to her house with her and visited my future father-in-law. It was really cold in the Northeast. As soon as I entered her house, my girlfriend asked me to get on the kang to warm up. She went to get me a cup of tea. I took off my clothes and went up. Then her mother led the neighbors, seven aunts and eight aunts, and then...

4 I remember when I was in college, I lived on the fourth floor. Someone splashed dirty water upstairs... and broke my computer desk. At that time, I wanted to go up and settle the score with him. As soon as I walked to the door, I had an idea and filled a bucket of water. They all fell down along the wall, and then heard howling below. People from the 1st floor, 2nd floor, and 3rd floor all came up... Then, I organized them to go and beat up the guy on the 5th floor.

5 One day, Xiaojun was writing a composition in the classroom: "My Home".

Xiaojun wrote: "There are three people in my family, my father, my mother and I. As soon as we go out every morning, the three of us go our separate ways, and go our separate ways at night.

My father is an architect, gesticulating on the construction site every day; my mother is a salesperson, and she is in the store every day. I am a student, and I am in the classroom every day. I was dumbfounded.

The three members of my family were very similar and the family was harmonious. However, when my grades were not good, my father also fought with my roommate and beat me to the point of being beaten mercilessly.

The woman asked, "What are you doing in bed?"

man's answer, "Dead"!

The woman asked again, "How come you still have your eyes open when you're dead?"

"I will never die in peace"! The man answered.

The woman asked again, "Then why are you still breathing?"

The man said, "I can't swallow this breath"!

7 An old man said: "That day when we were discussing swordsmanship in Mount Huashan, he first used the Ecstasy Palm to break my Seventy-two Roads Kong Ming Quan ; then I switched to the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms, but unexpectedly he stretched out his right index and middle fingers, and it turned out to be the Six Meridian Divine Sword Shangyang Sword and The combination of and is better than me. It can be seen that the martial arts in the world are mutually restrained and the ways of martial arts are mysterious! "

The young man was dazzled by this. When he was about to ask, the old lady next to him scolded: You can play rock, paper, scissors with such authority!

8 Some time ago, I learned to play mahjong and soon became addicted. However, my wife found out about it and she was firmly opposed to it. I promised her verbally not to play, but I still played secretly behind my back. Yesterday I played mahjong with Sister Wang, but my wife came to check on me. I lied and said I was sleeping, but my wife didn't believe it. I was anxious and said if I don't believe it, ask Sister Wang, she is next to me... I won't say anything anymore, and then kneel on the keyboard...

9 Asong and Abo chatted about nothing and told each other that time is not forgiving.

Asong: "Recalling my childhood, the happiest thing I have ever had is Children's Day."

Abo: "In ten years it will be Youth Day."

Asong: "In ten years it will be Father's Day ."

Abo: "In a few decades it will be Seniors’ Day .

A Song: “A few more decades.”

Abo: “Qingming Festival.”

10 I fainted from a penicillin injection in elementary school. I was already vaguely conscious after being sent to the emergency room. At that time, the female doctor pinched my ear with her fingers, which hurt. At the time, I thought it was a rescue measure like pinching someone's throat, so I accepted it silently. As a result, the doctor said: "This child is dying. He doesn't even respond to pinching like this..." My mother was so scared that she sat on the floor and started crying!

11 I was walking in a shopping mall just now, and a girl at the counter kept smiling at me, which made me feel unnatural! I mustered up the courage and stepped forward to ask her, "What are you laughing at?" MM said, "A thief just took out your phone, looked at it, shook his head and put it back!"

12 A guy is very stingy and is reluctant to throw away anything at home.

One day I went to his house and he was taking a cold shower.

I said: "Brother, what's wrong with you? How can you take a cold shower in such a cold day?"

He said something that I will never forget: "There are two packs of cold medicine left at home. If you don't take them, they will expire!

I said: "Brother, what's wrong with you? How can you take a cold shower in such a cold day?"

He said something that I will never forget: "There are two packs of cold medicine left at home. If you don't take them, they will expire!