1. Best friend: "I can't find a boyfriend. I'm really depressed!" Me: "You can go to the dating website to check it out!" My best friend quickly went to check it out and saw so many people who were single, and she was instantly relieved! 2. Passing by a cake shop, I went in and s

1. Best friend: "I have never been able to find a boyfriend. I am really depressed!"

Me: "You can go to the dating website to check it out!"

My best friend quickly went to take a look and saw so many people who were single, and she was instantly relieved!

2. Passing by the cake shop, I went in and said: "Boss! Get some wife cakes , no cakes."

Boss: "Haha, get lost.

3. Woman: "If you love me, just hug me. "

male: "It's true that I love you, and it's true that I can't hold you." "

4. On a dark and windy night, I walked into a small store. There was only a little girl and her mother in the store.

I looked a little fierce. The little girl looked at me and said to her mother: Mom, I am afraid.

I only heard her mother whisper: Don't talk, my mother is afraid too.

ml0

5. The Internet is often a trash can for venting. If you look carefully at what others throw into the trash can, wouldn’t you be disgusting?

6. Do you know that when I was a child, I could see some things that I couldn’t see when I grew up... Mainly because I became myopic when I grew up! 7. The weather has started to get colder. It’s time for girls to buy a new coat for their boyfriends, and it’s time for boys to buy their girlfriends: autumn sweaters and windbreakers, autumn trousers and leggings, stockings and stockings, shirts and sweaters, cashmere shoes and casual shoes, handbags, shoulder bags, shoulder bags, boots, hats, cotton jackets, lipstick gloves, baby warmers, etc.

8. A colleague just bought a piece of clothing. Another colleague said: Why are your clothes so damp? I added: It rained recently and the clothes did not dry, so they are relatively damp!

He immediately said: Why are you interrupting?

I said again: I just finished eating, so I have to wipe my mouth!

9.Male: “To you, I am nothing! "

female: "You can't say that. When you disturb me, you are like a fly. "

10. My mother: Have you been drinking?

Me: What did I drink when I came back from driving?

My mother: Open your mouth and I will smell it.

Me: Ah~~

My mother: Sure enough, you started smoking!!

11. Otaku: My goal is as long as I have one You can survive with a computer and a network cable.

A friend said quietly: If I don’t install broadband for you, just hang yourself with the network cable.

12. Don’t play with computers and mobile phones for a long time. This is not good for computers and mobile phones and will greatly shorten their service life!

13. Female: “I want to find a boyfriend. "

male: "What do you think of me? "

female: "Not very good. "

male: "Oh. I feel like you are not that good either, we are quite a match! "

14. My mother often criticizes me like this: "Look at how there is so much garbage in your trash can. "

" Why is the washing machine full of dirty clothes! "

" Why is there water in the toilet every time you take a shower! "

15. The Chinese teacher held a paper: Today's test paper is down. There is one classmate who I want to severely criticize. He hasn't finished the essay yet, and he still wants to get a high score. Okay, because this is the first time, I won't name him. Come on, Wang Xiaoming, take your paper.

16. Me 8:33: Are you there?

goddess 10:15: Yes!

me 11:45: Are you free now?

goddess 13:35: Well, I just finished eating, are you okay?

me 13:36: I want to have dinner with you, okay?

goddess 21:33: I have eaten! l017. Shopping online to vent your anger is like fighting a fire with a salary. If the salary is not exhausted, the fire will never be extinguished.

18. Playing with mobile phones in class will indeed lead to a decline in grades. I know this very well. Especially in the last semester, because I was always playing with my mobile phone in class, I didn’t teach them much.

19. There was a girl who often cursed at school. The class teacher’s comment on the child during the final exam was: This student has quick thinking and strong language skills!

20. What’s going on with these software now? When downloading, they formed a gang with four or five brothers. When I deleted the software, why didn’t I see you bring your brothers with you? You can share the blessings, but you can’t share the troubles? garbage