Some people say that Wang Luobin is a specimen of Chinese music for a century. He composed more than 1,000 songs in his life, among which the well-known " Lift your hijab and come " and " That distant place " have even been incorporated into teaching materials.
But human energy is limited. Because he focused on his career, Wang Luobin left deep regrets in his love life. Wang Luobin has had 4 relationships in his life, and the one he will never forget the most is his first wife Du Mingyuan (formerly known as Luo Shan/Luo Shan).
On December 12, 1994, Wang Luobin received a letter from his ex-wife Du Mingyuan, which said:
"I still remember that in the spring of 1941, you came to Lanzhou from Xining to find me and asked me why my hair was thinning. It was precisely because of Tian Ying. She was born on Christmas Eve in December 1940... When you recognize her, the recognition ceremony is very simple. Have a banquet for the press people, but don't mention me. "
The "Ying" mentioned in the letter is Li Ying. Years ago, she claimed to be Du Mingyuan's "niece" and came to Wang Luobin with Du Mingyuan's letter of introduction. A few years later, Du Mingyuan wrote another letter calling Li Ying his "biological daughter" and stating that Wang Luobin was Li Ying's father.
Faced with this "daughter" who fell from the sky, Wang Luobin was angry and sad, and then said with tears in his eyes: "This woman Du Mingyuan is really cruel, she wants to harm me." What on earth is going on? Everything has to start with the acquaintance of the two people.
1. Flash marriage after falling in love at first sight: Falling in love with a "phantom" is very fragile.
In 1936, Wang Luobin worked as a music teacher at the Rotary Middle School outside Xizhimen, Beiping. On this day, Wang Luobin participated in a disaster relief performance at the invitation of a friend.
Before the performance started, Wang Luobin was preparing props. A friend suddenly shouted: "Robin, come here quickly and introduce me to you."
Wang Luobin was looking for a prop. When he heard this, he joked: "What a big shot? Could you please introduce me personally?" As soon as he finished speaking, he saw the woman with a beautiful smile - Du Mingyuan.
Du Mingyuan is only seventeen or eighteen years old. Although he is a painting major, he loves dancing and is good at ballet. Looking at her facial features alone, Du Mingyuan was not considered a great beauty, but her unique artistic temperament, coupled with her hearty smile, instantly moved Wang Luobin's heart.
Du Mingyuan (second from right) Wang Luobin (third from right)
Coincidentally, in this charity performance, Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan will collaborate on the same stage, one a backup singer and the other a backup dancer. Du Mingyuan on the stage glanced at Wang Luobin charmingly, completely igniting the fire of love in his heart.
After that, Wang Luobin often followed Du Mingyuan to show his hospitality, first to greet him, and then to adapt Xu Zhimo's "Yunyou" into a song and give it to his beloved girl.
Romantic love came to an abrupt end under the sound of Marco Polo Bridge cannons. After the fall of Peiping, Du Mingyuan suddenly left without saying goodbye and disappeared without a trace. It turned out that in order to escape the war, she returned to her hometown of Kaifeng, leaving Wang Luobin alone in Peiping to endure the pain of lovesickness.
Not long after, Du Mingyuan wrote to Wang Luobin again to express her love. She wrote: "I have never told you that I love you before, with the fire in my heart, but now we are far apart, and this heartache... "After Wang Luobin received the letter, he was excited again and wrote the popular "Merry" for Du Mingyuan.
Later, Wang Luobin risked his life and traveled to Kaifeng, just to dedicate this hot love song to his sweetheart.
Du Mingyuan's father, Mr. Du, is a progressive gentleman. Mr. Du admires Wang Luobin from the occupied area very much. With Mr. Du's support, Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan held a low-key wedding.
After getting married, Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan came to Xi'an and joined the Northwest Field Service Corps. The husband sings and the wife follows, and the two were once considered a couple of gods, but in fact, there was a crisis hidden in this relationship from the beginning.
Wang Luobin's feelings for Du Mingyuan originated from love at first sight. Wang Luobin is a literary young man who thinks that love at first sight is eternal. As everyone knows, in real life, the most fragile thing is love at first sight.
This is due to the "halo effect halo effect " existing in the interactions between people, that is, in interpersonal interactions, a certain aspect of a person's characteristics will cover up other characteristics.
In other words, when we develop a good impression of the other person, we will assume that all other characteristics of this person are good. In other words, when fell in love at first sight, it was not the real person he fell in love with, but the beautiful "illusion" he imagined.
After getting along for a period of time, we will find that there is a big gap between the real person and the imagined person, and conflicts will naturally arise.
Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan were like this. After falling in love at first sight, Wang Luobin believed that all Du Mingyuan's qualities were perfect even without in-depth contact.
But in fact, after the Marco Polo Bridge Incident, Du Mingyuan returned to his hometown alone to avoid the war, which is enough to show that she was a companion who could not share adversity. Unfortunately, Wang Luobin, who was in the "halo effect" at the time, did not notice it.
2. Married for 2 years and separated in two places: a marriage with different views cannot last forever
In the spring of 1938, Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan set out from Xi'an with the Northwest Anti-Japanese War Troupe and traveled westward to promote the anti-Japanese war in Gansu and Qinghai.
Along the way, living conditions were very difficult. Wang Luobin was a man and had a passionate dream of music to support him, so he never felt bitter. But Du Mingyuan was a pampered young lady, and the harsh conditions and arduous march made her miserable. Fortunately, with her husband's company and support, Du Mingyuan finally persisted.
A few months later, the Northwest Anti-Japanese War Troupe disbanded. Du Mingyuan thought he could finally live a stable life, but Wang Luobin began to travel to Lanzhou, Xining and other places to collect western folk songs. Soon after, the two settled in Xining.
Xining belongs to Qinghai Province. During the war era, there was no electricity, water, shortage of materials, and harsh climate, which made Du Mingyuan unbearable. But in Xining, Wang Luobin seemed to have found his career destination. He left early and returned late every day, just to get the beautiful folk songs on the northwest plains.
Slowly, Du Mingyuan's temper began to become irritable, and sometimes he would even make trouble unreasonably. All kinds of things in Xining made her resentful, ranging from the environment and climate to as small as bricks and tiles.
One night, Wang Luobin worked late at night again. After returning home, Du Mingyuan started crying inexplicably. Wang Luobin asked her what was wrong, and Du Mingyuan said, "I feel very uncomfortable. Please send me back to Lanzhou for medical treatment."
Looking at his face Du Mingyuan was as usual, and Wang Luobin was not sure whether his wife was really sick, but out of concern for his wife, he took her back to Lanzhou overnight.
As soon as he arrived in Lanzhou, Du Mingyuan's illness was cured without medicine. A few days later, Wang Luobin proposed to return to Xining, and Du Mingyuan "fell ill" again. Only then did Wang Luobin realize that his wife was not ill, but rather unwilling to go to Xining to "suffer".
Seeing that Wang Luobin saw through his intentions, Du Mingyuan simply said: "I just don't want to go back to Xining, you can do it."
Wang Luobin was very conflicted between his beloved career and his beloved wife. In the end, he came up with a way to get the best of both worlds, letting his wife stay in Lanzhou and settle down while he returned to Xining to work alone.
Wang Luobin comforted his wife: "Xining and Lanzhou are only 200 kilometers away. I can come back often. Besides, a little farewell is better than a wedding. It is also a kind of romance." Such a life of going around is romantic to Wang Luobin, but to Du Mingyuan , but it is a kind of torture.
As Wang Luobin became busier and busier at work, the opportunities for the two to meet became less and less. Du Mingyuan was alone in a foreign land and felt lonely. Over time, he developed resentment towards Wang Luobin.
At this moment, a man named Xu Zelin broke into Du Mingyuan's life. The two were colleagues. During the days when Wang Luobin was not at home, Xu Zelin had always cared about and taken care of Du Mingyuan. Du Mingyuan's emotional balance soon favored Xu Zelin.
She no longer expressed her longing for her husband in letters. Even if her husband wrote to greet her, she would only say a few perfunctory words. However, Wang Luobin, who was far away in Xining, did not notice the changes in his wife, because at this time he was not only busy with work, but his heart was also disturbed by another woman.
In 1939, Wang Luobin went to Xinjiang to assist in the filming of the movie "Long Live the Motherland". The shepherdess in the movie was played by a local girl Saye Dolma .
Before starting the movie, the director suddenly decided that he needed a helper to play with the shepherdess. Many Tibetans came to audition, but the director was never satisfied. Finally, someone suggested, "Let Wang Luobin play the role."
Just like that, Wang Luobin and Zhuoma filmed together for 3 days. The two were riding on the same horse. Dolma was good at equestrian skills and waved his whip wantonly on the horse. In order not to be thrown off the horse, Wang Luobin could only hug Dolma's waist tightly.
Dolma
There was a scene where Dolma was running on the grassland. She was particularly dazzling under the sunset. Wang Luobin was stunned for a moment. Dolma saw Wang Luobin's absence and playfully threw the shepherd's whip on him.
This whip completely disturbed Wang Luobin's heart, but he did not dare to show his sincerity, so he just wrote his full admiration in "In That Far Place".
Because of its sincere feelings and melodious melody, this song soon spread all over the country. As the song became popular, Wang Luobin's love for Dolma became stronger and stronger, but he knew that he had a wife. Although he was reluctant to let go, he left decisively.
When he returned to Xining, Wang Luobin discovered that he had not received a reply to the last letter he wrote to his wife. At this time, his friend told him that Du Mingyuan had cheated on him and even let the man live in his home. Looking back on his wife's cold behavior in letters in recent months, Wang Luobin suddenly felt something was wrong.
But Wang Luobin still didn't want to believe that his wife would betray him. He rushed back to Lanzhou overnight, only to see a strange man at home. Before Wang Luobin could say anything, Du Mingyuan spoke first: "Where will you live tonight?" It was obvious that there was another male owner in this house.
Although he was sad, Wang Luobin could only let go. He issued a divorce statement in the newspaper, and the two ended their three-year marriage.
In this marriage, Wang Luobin had an emotional affair, and Du Mingyuan completely betrayed him. It is difficult to judge who is right and who is wrong. The only thing that is certain is that there is a huge gap between the two people's views.
What Wang Luobin needs is a wife who can ride with him on the grasslands and travel in the Northwest. He regards living in two places as romantic; but Du Mingyuan hopes to live a stable life with her husband in a city with superior conditions. She hates the Northwest, I think living in two places is suffering.
In addition, both Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan overestimate feelings. They both thought that they had loved each other so much that they would sacrifice everything for each other and endure loneliness. As everyone knows, relationships also require careful management and continuous learning and practice.
3. Wang Luobin finally let go after 25 years of divorce: What hurts the most is not the betrayal, but the obsession.
The failure of his first marriage made Wang Luobin lose confidence in his relationship. Three years later, his friends enthusiastically introduced him to a marriage partner. . Wang Luobin just said calmly: "Everything will be the same as before. See you when we get married."
In this way, Wang Luobin married his second wife Huang Yulan. After marriage, Huang Yulan gave birth to three sons. During the years when Wang Luobin was pursuing his career outside, Huang Yulan managed the family finances without any regrets, so that he no longer had any worries.
Huang Yulan and two sons
But even so, Wang Luobin still had the feeling of "being bitten by a snake once and being afraid of the rope for ten years" and did not dare to give too much affection to his wife. In the seventh year of their marriage, Huang Yuying died of illness. After settling down his three children, Wang Luobin was no longer in the mood for love and decided to devote the rest of his life to the music career.
Perhaps it was because God was about to give this man a great responsibility. In the following ten years, Wang Luobin's life was very difficult. In those dark years, he turned all his sorrow and grievances into notes and wrote songs that may never be heard.
It was not until the late 1970s that Wang Luobin's life got back on track, and he was dubbed the "King of Chinese Folk Songs". Several folk songs he wrote were also collected into "Wang Luobin Song Collection" and flew to the land of China. Years of dedication and forbearance finally turned into flowers and honor.
Only then did Wang Luobin dare to face Du Mingyuan's betrayal of him. In 1975, Wang Luobin wanted to rehearse a Henan opera , but he did not have a suitable script at hand. After much thought, he decided to write to his ex-wife Du Mingyuan for help.
Before picking up the pen, Wang Luobin struggled for a long time on how to speak. But in the end, he turned all his unwillingness and resentment into care and greetings for his old friend.
After the letter was sent, Wang Luobin did not have high hopes. After all, the two had not been in contact for more than 30 years. But a few days later, he still received a package from Du Mingyuan. In addition to several Yu opera scripts, there was also a fleece jacket in the package.
Some people say that Wang Luobin has only truly loved Du Mingyuan in his life. The reason why I say this is because more than 30 years after the two divorced, Wang Luobin has been unable to let go. He didn't understand why Du Mingyuan betrayed him, nor why his feelings changed so easily.
Until he caressed the fleece Du Mingyuan sent, the gentle touch reminded him of those sweet years, and the woman who made him love deeply and hurt so much gradually became clear in his mind. He also finally understood that some things are enough as long as he once had them.
The most hurtful thing is not the betrayal of others, but our own obsession, our inability to let go, our anger, and our inability to figure things out. Wang Luobin sighed, finally relieved, and the resentment accumulated for decades also disappeared with the wind.
4. A "daughter" fell from the sky after 53 years of divorce: a good goodbye is one and two widths
For Wang Luobin, this failed marriage finally came to an end. But for Du Mingyuan, the feud between the two is far from over.
After the divorce, Du Mingyuan married an official. In 1958, Du Mingyuan's husband passed away, and five years later, she remarried the widowed Mr. Lu. Although Du Mingyuan remarried twice, Wang Luobin was always the one she couldn't let go of.
As Wang Luobin became more and more famous, the fact that Du Mingyuan had betrayed his marriage was also reported by major newspapers. Du Mingyuan believed that Wang Luobin deliberately exposed his scandal to reporters, so he developed a "revenge" mentality towards Wang Luobin. This mentality reached its peak after the year-end love affair between Wang Luobin and Sanmao was exposed.
In 1990, Taiwanese writer Sanmao came to Xinjiang because he admired Wang Luobin's musical talent. Although the two were decades apart in age, they still fell in love. San Mao once said to Wang Luobin in a letter: "I don't want to call you teacher. Respect and love are not the same title. You can't ask me not to love you. At this point, I am free."
Luo Wang Luobin and San Mao Mao
Unfortunately, the two eventually parted ways due to differences in lifestyle and cultural background. A month after the two separated, Sanmao hanged himself. After learning the bad news, Wang Luobin got drunk at home, and then wrote the affectionate song "Waiting":
You will never come again, I will always wait. , the more I wait, the more I love.
Wang Luobin and Sanmao's love affair was widely reported. Du Mingyuan naturally knew about their relationship. In a letter to Wang Luobin, she said sourly:
"Robin, why do you add '' before my name?" The word "friend" is not "love at dusk". The Sanmao you are waiting for has changed you. I am not jealous. You are probably famous and have begun to despise everything. "
Not only that, in order to retaliate against Wang Luobin, Du Mingyuan even told reporters. When the two broke up, it was actually Wang Luobin who was at fault. This made Wang Luobin very angry, and after that, the two broke off contact.
Until December 12, 1994, Wang Luobin received another letter from Du Mingyuan, which led to the scene at the beginning of the article. Du Mingyuan said in the letter that "niece" Li Ying was his and Wang Luobin's daughter, and hoped that Wang Luobin would publicly recognize her. .
Wang Luobin was convinced that he and Du Mingyuan had never had a child. He could not understand why the woman he once loved so much would hurt him again and again: first she cheated, then she slandered her, and now she created an inexplicable "daughter".
Thinking of this, Wang Luobin shed two lines of tears. He said sadly and angrily: "This woman Du Mingyuan is so cruel! She has harmed me all my life. After decades, she gave this woman to me without any explanation. You insist it’s mine. No, it’s still hurting me!”
In fact, Li Ying is indeed not the daughter of Du Mingyuan and Wang Luobin, not even their niece. Back then, Du Mingyuan opened a dating agency , and Li Ying was just one of the customers. After helping Li Ying introduce several partners without success, Du Mingyuan actually asked Li Ying to seek refuge with Wang Luobin.
Soon after, Li Ying found Wang Luobin with Du Mingyuan's letter of introduction and called him uncle. A few years later, Du Mingyuan went even further and directly lied that Li Ying was their daughter.
On January 6, 1996, Wang Luobin died of gallbladder adenocarcinoma. Before his death, he specifically made a will, emphasizing that he would only have three sons in his life and no other adopted children.
But even so, after Wang Luobin's death, some media still called Li Ying Wang Luobin's daughter. In order to find out the truth, Wang Luobin's son Wang Haicheng went to Kaifeng to find Du Mingyuan.
Du Mingyuan frankly admitted that the content in "Recognizing Confidants" was false, but when Wang Haicheng asked her why she wrote the letter, the old lady just laughed and said that she couldn't tell clearly.
After the truth came out, Wang Haicheng took out a photo of Wang Luobin and Du Mingyuan in the past. After seeing the photo, 80-year-old Du Mingyuan burst into tears with excitement. Looking at the very similar appearance of his husband, Mr. Lu, and Wang Luobin, Wang Haicheng finally understood. .
Where there is love, there is hatred. For Du Mingyuan, whether she betrayed Wang Luobin, slandered Wang Luobin, or even fabricated a daughter out of thin air, it was all because she always loved Wang Luobin. Just like a child deliberately making trouble and being rebellious in order to attract the attention of his parents.
It’s just that Du Mingyuan never understood throughout his life that hurting, asking for, and betraying are not love, but tolerance, giving, and fulfillment are. No matter how wonderful it was, if you miss it, you will miss it. Even if you are reluctant to let go, it is best to "separate the two and live happily."
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-