The imbalance in marriage is all because of this!

Jack Ma once said the marriage testimony for a couple: What is the algorithm of

marriage? Marriage is not clear, do I love you more or do you love me more?

Do you care more or do I calculate less?

Marriage algorithm, forget it in the end, this is the best algorithm.

There is always friction between husband and wife, and it is impossible to follow someone’s will all the time. Only when two individuals do not care too much can this marriage go further, and there will be less trouble. Jump situation.

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A few days ago, a user in our backstage found Xiaojin and started a long period of complaints, saying that as her husband’s position rose and his salary rose, her husband started to settle accounts with her.

In the first few years of marriage, she and her husband’s wages were similar, so the two agreed to get their respective wages, and then the husband’s money was responsible for repaying the monthly mortgage. She was responsible for household expenses and usual housework. Two people can do anything.

But later, the husband's salary was getting higher and higher, even more than twice hers, and then the husband's speech and behavior began to change.

Once, after the two of them had eaten, she went to coax the baby to sleep, so she told him that you should clean up and wash the dishes. Then the husband was very upset and said:

"I am very tired at work and earn so much." When the money comes back, you still have to do housework, so you earn so little salary and pay so little, shouldn’t you do more?"

When she heard her husband say that, she was anxious and also commuted to work to make money. Most of the children’s things are for themselves In the band, now let him do some housework as usual, just count with her.

The salary he earns becomes an excuse for him not to do housework, so he is so superior.

then quarrels that cannot be avoided, picking up everything one by one, saying, what do you give, what do I give, and who is more disadvantaged? The result of the calculation of

just like this is to break up, each is angry.

I told her that you are holding a scale now, and then weighing each other's efforts at every turn to see if there is a balance. If the balance is unbalanced, you must find the balance, but there is only one kind of calculation. Maybe that is to forget the relationship between two people. Before

, you didn't know how to calculate those, so you had a very harmonious life, but now when you start to calculate, is it more difficult?

Marriage has always been counted, there will always be imbalances, the quarrels brought about by such imbalances are endless.

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The largest proportion of marriages is trivial life. There was a set of divorce data that showed that compared with derailment, domestic violence and other reasons, the reason for divorce due to family trivial conflicts between husband and wife is as high as 34.21%. .

Many marriages do not have many problems. They are more concerned with the attitude and behavior of both parties in the trivial matter of life.

When one person or two people in the marriage begin to calculate whether their contributions and gains are balanced, they will be unable to control the comparison, and then find that they have given too much and the other party has too little.

feels that he is not worthy, and the other party must do the same. Then once such a thought is formed in his head, he will look for the other party's mistakes like a magnifying glass, and then take out the scale and weigh it. When

is unbalanced, start counting, what the other party should do, and then start various requirements. Whoever

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is, he will definitely have a mentality of resistance when he is asked, and such a marriage must be furious.

So, don’t we just count as our selfless dedication?

is definitely not. We are discussing that the results of marriage are not good, but we do not advocate selfless dedication. In a happy marriage, there will be no shortage of smart wives, who know how to guide the other party to see their contributions in a timely manner, and then use appropriate methods to let the other party cooperate with them to maintain the family of the two.

is not sacrificing work and sacrificing oneself to maintain the family, but clever use of skills to let the other party and oneself take care of the family.