01
It is true that only three points of words are spoken to people, leaving seven points of room.
When the Song Dynasty was , Su Dongpo was impeached because of a sentence "Your Majesty knows that he is stupid and unhappy, it is difficult to pursue newcomers", and then he was involved in the Wutai Poetry Case . Then, he was imprisoned for several months and demoted to Huangzhou.
The prince consort Wang Gui, officials Wang Gong, Zhang Fangping , etc., were all implicated.
When people reach middle age, they are the heaven of their family, the life of their lovers, and the pillar of their work. How can they be careless? Don’t think about yourself, you must be responsible for everyone.
" disease enters from the mouth, and disaster comes from the mouth." As a human being, you have to learn lessons. There is no need to ruin your future because of a few words, and people can seize the handle of your conversation.
"Be careful of your words" is not only a kind of wisdom, but also a philosophy of dealing with people and things.
02
Important decision, learning to be cautious can prevent "the partition walls from having ears".
Spring and Autumn , Dong Huan of Qi and Guan Zhong discuss the major event of territorial expansion.
At that time, the two of them leaned together and whispered, and did not announce specific plans to the public.
A few days later, people knew that Duke Huan of Qi wanted to lead his troops to attack .
Guan Zhong was shocked after hearing the rumors. Hurry up and discuss with Duke Huan of Qi, what should I do?
It turned out that when they were "whispering", there was a minister named Dongguoya not far away.
Dong Guoya judged the word "discussing major events" based on the facial expressions of Guan Zhong and Duke Huan of Qi, because Guan Zhong opened his mouth and did not close it for a long time, and judged the word "Ju". At that time, although Ju was a small country, it was the hero of Dongyi .
can be seen, the routine of "ears in partition walls" is really profound. Your mouth shape can reveal your goals. If you see through it, you will inevitably encounter setbacks.
people reach middle age and have competitors everywhere. Once your words are spread, your opponent will be prepared in advance, or take positive measures to take precedence, so that you will fail from the beginning.
Things that look airtight actually have airtight "mouth". Your mouth is originally a "hot spot" and you have to be careful. In the face of major events, it is best to be cautious, look at the occasion and the surrounding environment, and be careless.
03
Life scandals, learn to be cautious and stop losses in time.
We all understand the truth that "do not expose others' ugliness or tell others' shortcomings", but we are prone to expose our own shortcomings. Don't think that you can ridicule yourself in anything.
"Lüshi Chunqiu " records: A man named Bai Gong asked Confucius if he could tell others secrets.
Confucius did not answer.
Mr. Bai asked: "If you treat the secret as a stone and throw it into the water, no one will know it. If you treat the secret as water and pour it into the water, no one will know it."
Confucius replied: "There is a chef named Yiya next to Duke Huan of Qi. He can taste all kinds of flavors. He must know this water and that water."
It is said that if you often walk by the river, how can you not wet your shoes?
In order to ensure that the shoes are dry, just don’t go to the river to walk. In order to keep the secret, it's enough not to say it. It can be inferred that you don’t have a word about your scandal, even if you are a good friend, the same is true. No one guarantees whether today's buddy is tomorrow's opponent or the enemy the day after tomorrow.
If you don’t talk about anything, you will block the channels of communication and you can start separately from now on.
If you are ugliness and have been known to others, don’t pay attention to other people’s gossip. As the saying goes, all rumors are stopped by the wise.
04
When you meet a villain, learn to be cautious and you can see the other person’s true face.
Guiguzi said: "If you want to hear the sound, you will be silent; if you want to be open and restrained."
You can imagine that in a place where many people do not speak, others will speak first, and then expose their inner thoughts and their true faces. This is the wisdom of "controlling with stillness".
Confucius and his friend Wen Boxuezi had an interesting "dialogue".
The two met, without saying a word, Confucius left.
Confucius' student Zigong asked: "Teacher, why are you speechless?"
Confucius said: "He is a moral person at first glance, and you don't need to say anything."
politician Lu Buwei After knowing this, he commented on : "How can the sage know each other? "How can you say it?"
Two smart people, with like-minded people, can understand each other, and they don't say it, but they understand it. On the other hand, when a villain gets along with him and says ten thousand words, he cannot educate the other party. Instead, he will be resentful, exploited, and spread rumors.
Through observation, you can know many situations; through body language, you can understand the other person. This is the way of wise men interacting. If the person you meet doesn’t understand you at all, most of them are not fellow travelers, you must be careful about them.
In front of people who don’t know the details, as long as you keep quiet, the other party will not be able to help but speak. As soon as he opens his mouth, you win. Therefore, you can learn to seek profit and avoid harm and ensure that you will not be hurt.
05
The situation is complicated, and you can learn to be cautious and you can strive for the opportunity to "decide".
During the Spring and Autumn Period, Duke Xiang of Jin asked for instructions from the emperor of Zhou to go to Santu Mountain to pray for blessings.
Emperor Zhou agreed. The minister beside him saw the clues. After Duke Xiang of Jin left, he said, "Looking at Duke Xiang of Jin, he is probably not as simple as praying for blessings."
Therefore, the Emperor Zhou emperor was ready for turmoil.
As expected, on that day of praying for blessing, Duke Xiang of Jin and his soldiers occupied several cities.
has a kind of wisdom called "see through but not speak through". This means that we must observe everything outside the world carefully, but don’t rush to say it out, but determine the situation and make plans.
On the road of life, there are constant wind and rain, and the clouds and sunshine alternate. We cannot be careless. The more complicated things are, the more you should keep calm. If you reveal your ideas, you will be alerting the enemy and your decision will be invalid.
For example, at work, you need to predict what your boss wants to do, but don’t say it out loud, otherwise it will make everyone think that you are robbing the credit and if your boss immediately takes it back, you will still make a fool of yourself.
06
Confucius once said: "You can speak with others without saying anything, you will lose people; you cannot speak with others without saying anything."
When people reach middle age, they want to start a business and support their families. says nothing, which is impossible; say anything, this is not feasible.
Therefore, it is necessary to learn to be cautious. Speak selectively, say what you should say, and be silent if you don’t say it.
There are fewer words, but the accuracy is high, and you are the one who is "one word and nine tripod". Before opening
, "filter" first, and the rest are the essence.
Author: Common people eat coarse food.
Follow my text and enter your heart.
The pictures in the article are from the Internet.
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