The reader wrote:
The husband is a civil servant, and he works at 9 am to 5 am and has two breaks; I work in a private company and I am a senior manager of the company. I have to attend many meetings every month, work overtime and have a fixed rest time. Compared to my husband, my only balance point: I earn nearly twice his monthly income.
My husband and I were high school classmates. At that time, we were both top students and we were a bit sympathetic. After graduating from college, we chose to return to the city development career of growing up, and with the help of classmates, we established a romantic relationship.
During our relationship, my husband was really nice to me: 1) pick me up and drop me off to and from get off work; 2) give me lunch boxes when I work overtime; 3) I will also create some small romance for me during festivals.
However, after getting married, my husband's concern for me gradually disappeared: although my husband took on more housework, I can't remember when I went home every night and could only eat my husband's leftovers.
In the words of my husband: You get off work very late every day, and when you get home, I am so hungry, so I will eat my meal first.
Gradually, I was a little unhappy about eating leftovers of my husband, but I never had any emotions in front of me.
As for picking me up and dropping off to and from get off work, sending bentoes when I work overtime, and creating romance during festivals, all of them have disappeared.
Regarding my get off work, my husband doesn't pick me up and drop off, I can understand that because I also have a car, but I am quite disappointed with giving bentoes when I work overtime and creating the disappearance of romance during festivals.
I don’t know if it is because men will unconsciously ignore their wives after getting married for a long time, or if their husbands are tired of life with me.
Sometimes, I am still quite confused about our marriage.
Muzili Emotional analysis:
Regarding marriage life, some people may think that as long as they get married, it is a kind of happiness for both of them to make money; some people may think that it is a kind of happiness for two people to have common hobbies; and some people may think that it is a kind of happiness for two people to do things together.
You and your husband, one is a civil servant and the other works in a private company, will have some conflicts at the working time level, resulting in: you don’t have much time intersection.
The final final: it forms a pattern where you cannot eat and play together.
It’s not that your husband is impatient with you, but you can’t let your husband wait for you to have dinner after get off work every day. You also said that you often hold meetings and work overtime, and your husband can’t control the time you get off work. In this case, how can you bear to let your husband starve?
In fact, even if you are both civil servants, or you are both working in private enterprises, sometimes there will be conflicts in time or life habits.
So, don't try to make your husband compromise every time.
Of course, if two people are together for a long time, they will inevitably lose some "politeness". In fact, the so-called "care" is sometimes just the product of politeness.
’s advice to you: Don’t be too sensitive to some small links. In addition, you can take the initiative to create the romance you want while you are resting.
It is really not easy to start a family. You can’t always let your husband accommodate you in everything. One detail: In the years after you got married, your husband will do more housework. During this period, your husband didn't complain too much about you. Just because of this, you should be grateful for your husband’s efforts for his family and understanding the difficulties of your husband.
When examining your lover, you cannot always see the grievances you have suffered in him, and you also need to see the efforts made by the other party for this relationship. When you can examine your relationship from a grateful level, you will find that your relationship between husband and wife is not bad.
(The picture is from the Internet, the picture is irrelevant)
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