01
When studying, I was hurt by the feudal society's " eats the worst ".
In a family, if the male owner dies and does not have a son in the family, he will be considered a "failed family". Men's wives, concubines and daughters have no right to speak, nor have property inheritance rights ; it depends entirely on brothers and nephews in the big family.
Usually, wives and concubines remarry, or are sold, and their daughters marry out, and their young daughter lives in their own home, but becomes "foster care", and in the end they cannot escape the end of marrying out or selling out.
Since the bad habit of "eating out of households", many families have been broken, and some families have struggled hard to have a son.
02
There is a story in the Qing Dynasty novel " Eight Caves ".
Five dynasties period, there was a man named Ji Yanzuo in Guide Prefecture, Henan, his wife Qiang.
The couple has been running a family for more than ten years and gradually become rich. But there are no children.
Ji Yanzuo wanted to find a concubine, but Qiang did not agree. After all, there are many wives and concubines, and it is inevitable that we will be jealous.
Seeing that he was over forty years old, Ji Yanzuo was anxious and got into a relationship with the maid Yi Nan at home and soon became pregnant.
Qiang regards Yi Nan as a thorn in his eyes, and then secretly sells Yi Nan to the rich man Bi Sifu.
On the other side, Ji Yanzuo's nephew Ji Wanghong lost his wealth because of eating, drinking, gambling, and was looking for an opportunity to "eat the worst". He thought that if his uncle Ji Yanzuo had never had a son, his family fortune would definitely become his own.
After Qiang's death, Ji Yanzuo spent a lot of money to "redeem" Yi Nan, and at the same time Yi Nan brought back a boy.
Ji Wanghong is unwilling to let go of his plan and sued Ji Yanzuo for recognizing outsiders as his son and breaking the family rules. In the county government office, Ji Yanzuo and the boy "recognize their relatives with blood" to clarify the facts.
I thought that things would stop here. But Ji Wanghong had a more vicious plan, stole the boy and sold it to the capital.
Eight years later, Ji Yanzuo went to the capital to pray for blessings and met his son again. Ji Wanghong's wishful thinking was not successful.
Not only do ordinary people try their best to "eat the worst", but some nobles are also the same.
For example, the Song Dynasty literati Li Qingzhao married second marriage and married Zhang Ruzhou . After getting married, Zhang Ruzhou's true form was revealed and he wanted to possess the remaining cultural relics around Li Qingzhao.
Warring States , Kuolie King has no son. Li Yuan and Chunshenjun conspired to let the pregnant Li Yuan's sister enter the palace and become the favorite concubine of King chukaole. After King Kaollie of Chu passed away, Li Yuan's sister's son became King You of Chu, and Li Yuan became a powerful minister.
"Man dies for money, birds die for food". In the final analysis, "eating out of households" is for money. The so-called "family prosperity" is just a cover.
We often say "Fat water does not flow from outsiders' fields." No matter what, as long as you give your property to someone with blood, you will have no regrets and you can still come back at any time. But some relatives are more ruthless than outsiders and have to be careful.
03
As the saying goes, "Flies do not bite seamless eggs."
The times are changing, but some traditional ideas are still continuing, especially in some backward villages.
has a real case.
The three sisters Afang, Aqiong and Aling in Pingnan County, Guangxi have been bullied by big families everywhere since their parents and brothers passed away.
Uncles and some relatives of the same clan planted crops on the land they contracted. When land acquisition was collected, relatives set the compensation of more than 300,000 yuan in their own name.
In desperation, the three sisters sued their relatives. Pingnan Court made a judgment to support the legitimate rights and interests of the three sisters.
After seeing the reality of "eating with a huge family", I remembered an ancient saying: Relatives do not share wealth, and they share wealth and exchanges. The sentence gives us wisdom to deal with problems.
One, build a decent family so that outsiders can take advantage of it.
When your family is rich and powerful, outsiders will be afraid of you.Even if you want to plot against you, you will be afraid. For example, the family is very united, and the son-in-law is raised as a son and let the daughter be the master in the family.
Whether it is a man or a woman, you must launch a stronger "parent" to establish your prestige and not let outsiders laugh at it.
Secondly, change traditional ideas and resolutely safeguard family interests.
When you meet unreasonable relatives, you should not give in step by step, but adhere to the new idea of "men and women are passed down to future generations". Relatives who offend you should be attacked.
It is a bad thing to sue between relatives, but if you are forced into a desperate situation, you are still at risk for your face, and you are the one who suffers.
Usually, in the group of relatives, we should promote more positive energy to get rich through labor and unity and friendship. Even if you are an only child, you should be a person with confidence and not think that you are short.
Third, keep a distance from relatives, especially don’t “money comes and goes”.
When dating relatives, keep a low profile and do not show off your money and status. Even if you become a well-known wealthy person, don’t show off, but continue to live a simple life. In this way, relatives will not know your strength and reduce jealousy.
The ancients said, "If you have nothing to do, you won't go to the Three Treasures Hall." Poor relatives come to visit you, mostly asking you to do things or borrow money. If you have money, you should be more careful. A relative who is stronger than you is here, you must figure out the purpose.
Some relatives are always eyeing your family and can consider breaking off diplomatic relations. Never lead wolves into the house.
For example, if you make a name for yourself in the provincial capital, you don’t have to go back to your hometown to settle down. In the future, the descendants will be able to regard the provincial capital as their hometown.
04
For ancient culture, we must take the essence and remove the dross.
"A woman has no talent and virtue; a husband dies and follows his son" not only do not believe it, but also attack it. Read hard and develop in parallel with the times, showing the new look of the family.
There is a saying, it is difficult for people to know, and the rivers and seas are not enough to describe their depth.
People's hearts are deeper than the sea, which is daunting. Don’t treat all relatives as relatives, choose to have sex. Those who come for money, just see through it and don’t say it thoroughly, just give it up.
is here to warn those who have bad intentions to rely on themselves to make money, and bullying one's heart is the consequence of being bad.
Author: Common people eat coarse food.
Follow my text and enter your heart.
The pictures in the article are from the Internet.
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