My story 03: After admitting to cheating, my husband told me why

This experience is really painful. I don't like to recall painful things, but I have already experienced it. Since the experience, don't suffer in vain.

But the value written is more, I want to tell the person who is suffering on the edge of the cliff, you are not alone, don't do stupid things, don't hurt yourself....

In these years, people have no power in their hearts, and it is easy to be desperate by family tragedies, suicide, self-mutilation, and become lunatic, because the trauma of the soul is too serious. For example, the following news:

July 17th, a woman in Hangzhou, Zhejiang Province suffered from depression and personality disorder. Her husband had derailed for 5 years. The woman had repeatedly thoughts of mischievous life. After quarreling with her junior, she decided Suicide by burning charcoal made her husband and her junior. Worried about the suffering of her three sons, she took three children with her. In the end, the woman was rescued and survived, but her three sons were poisoned and sentenced to life for committing intentional homicide. imprisonment.

I don’t want this kind of tragedy to happen in the world. I hope all those who are in this pain, believe that you will be fine, and you can survive.

In the last article, I said that I found evidence of my husband’s derailment, and he admitted it, but I passed out in pain and was still in a coma. I saw myself falling from a cliff, waiting for me to wake up. At that time, I suddenly "understood".

At that time, I had a feeling of coming back to life. I suddenly realized that human death is an experience.

is like dreaming, dreaming that you are dead, you will truly experience death in the dream, just as if you really died once, this kind of death experience makes me really think that the reality of myself is already dead. I had an epiphany and understood a truth. If a person can't die before he really dies, since death can't be dead, then what's terrible about me.

So suddenly I was not afraid of anything,Since you are not afraid of death, then...face it.

From the moment he admitted to cheating, I was in pain until I passed out, and then I opened my eyes. I saw him bow his head, some low and some at a loss sitting next to me...

My first sentence was: "I did it wrong, I must have done it wrong, otherwise you won’t be like this. To me."

After all, it has been ten years from falling in love to getting married and having children. How many ten years are there in life? We are only in our 30s, and ten years are really long.

I thought at the time, if you want to betray someone who has treated yourself well for ten years, how much hate, how hate it? Because I'm really going to die of pain, it seems that I have already died once, open my eyes to face, and die a second, third, fourth...

my husband listened to me The previous sentence was about to cry. He seemed to feel very sorry for me, and began to tell...

"Actually, at the beginning, I didn't have much interest. You weren't by my side. I went out with a few colleagues. They all I said that bringing a female colleague together is fun, but I have no objection, but along the way, she especially likes to talk to me... I go out more often, and slowly... She cares about me more and more, and I don't know why , May it be because of the aura of a boss? And... She is in front of me, very different from you, you are a high princess, always I accommodate you, I take care of you, but she doesn’t need me to do anything, she She cooks for me every day, buys a lot of food, clothing, shelter, and transportation. She can take care of me. She does everything in detail... My heart is unknowingly, a little... I don't know how to refuse, because I have never been hurt like this. Unfortunately, you... always think I am not good enough, always like to fight with me... She listens to me..."

I lay silently, "Oh... she is so good?"

My husband: "In the beginning, I just thought she was able to endure hardships. She is from Shandong. She is an older sister and has a younger brother. She takes care of her younger brother very much. And I happen to have an older sister, like a family. Her family is also patriarchal, and my family is also, you know... you know what,Your hands are soft, smooth and tender, but her hands are as rough as dead branches because she needed to pick apples to do a lot of farm work when she was a child.

I smiled, "Oh, the hands are rough...so you...do you feel bad for her?" "

My husband shook his head, "At first, she felt sorry for me, because every time I chat with you, she always has a heavy expression. She always asks me why I am unhappy and always asks..."

I Nodded, "Always ask..."

I thought to myself, my body bleeds for a long time during my childbirth and confinement period. I really can't talk to you in a good mood. I must be in my heart. When I am suffering, do I feel good with other women? My heart is like broken blood, and there is no way to complete myself.

"Who will feel bad for my suffering?

My husband said nothing, he asked, "What do you want?

He may be thinking, do I want a divorce, and I, I don’t know, I thought to myself, I am divorced now, how much can I fight for?

I still can’t get a divorce, I am now I don’t even have a stable job. If I want to divide property and children, I’m too passive, so I know what he’s going to say, I just answer: “It’s okay. If it's bad, you will do it because it is too painful. How long do you need, you know, if you keep going, the person who died in pain must be me. We...we have been together for ten years, and our children...have them all. "

After saying this, I feel like I'm going to be so disgusted by myself, but I can only say that. I am very powerless.

After I said this, he seemed, very surprised... He might suddenly realize , I have such a soft attitude, not what he thinks.

"I thought, you will be furious, throw things around and ask me and you to divorce immediately. "

I smiled slightly,"Unfortunately I am not. I don't even have the strength to stand up right now. I...I feel like I was filled with lead. I can't stand up. I've already died once."

I said it was true, my first time Understand that I have lost my husband's love for me, and I will actually lose this love that has been protected by marriage. I have lost it!

For me, it was a failure and a shame. This kind of thing would happen in my life, this kind of life failure, I...really couldn't bear it at the time.

After this communication, my husband understood one thing, that is, he knew that his wife was going to forgive him and did not intend to divorce him. His original divorce plan was unnecessary.

He started a little bit and started to move closer to me.

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