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In today's life, it is a very common phenomenon for the elderly to help their children with their children. Whether you like it or not, or if there are other things, for most people, this task cannot be evaded.
Speaking of it, simply bringing children is not a difficult task, but three generations of people gather under one roof to live their lives, interact with each other every day, and have different living habits and life concepts. There is a high probability that problems or contradictions will arise.
63-year-old Aunt Feng in the community has had such an experience. While chatting, she said sadly that went to her son's home to help, but was rejected. The daughter-in-law said she was greedy and lazy, and the granddaughter said she couldn't do anything . What is going on here? Next, let's listen to what she said.
01,
My wife and I have been married for 40 years. We have a deep love and affection for each other. Although he is very ordinary and has no great abilities, in my heart, he is a good man who can't live without. For decades, I have been cared for by him, and I have hardly worried about the things at home, and I have rarely done housework.
We only have one baby boy. Because he was spoiled since childhood, he was a little headstrong. After college, he was reluctant to go to work, but insisted on starting a business and opening a restaurant. On this issue, not only did my wife not stop him, but instead gave money and effort, and he was particularly supportive.
Not long after, the son got married and became a family. The young couple ran the business together, and their life was quite stable. Later, they had children and their business grew. In the past few years, my mother-in-law had been helping to look after the children, but since they became grandma, they didn't want to stay any longer.
In this case, As a grandmother, I can only work. Although I don't want to leave my wife and children, I don't want to go, but taking care of my granddaughter is my own business.
02
When I go to my son's house, I mainly pick up my granddaughter to and from school, watch my homework, and clean up my housework when I am free. Ordinarily, this matter is nothing to the average elderly.
Just to say it again, I am not an "average" housewife. Since I was young, I had little control over the big and small things at home, so these seemingly simple tasks have become a big problem in my eyes.
First of all, my cooking skills are very poor. cooks dishes every day, not to mention that my granddaughter does not like to eat, even I have no appetite . How can this be done?
After thinking and thinking, I finally found an excuse. I once told my son that I have to pick up my children and do my homework. I often don’t have time to cook. I can see if I can deliver some food from the restaurant to my home. The son agreed without saying anything.
03
After a while, when I was secretly happy for my cleverness, my daughter-in-law suddenly became unhappy. One night, the young couple had a big fight. I didn't want to mix up, but suddenly my daughter-in-law mentioned me, saying that I don't do housework, don't cook, and think about eating restaurants every day. It's really greedy and lazy.
This makes me feel so embarrassed, not to mention that I am here to help, I just don't help, can I let my son give me something to eat as a mother? Your daughter-in-law has too much control, right?
On an impulse, I ran over to get angry and said that I would not deliver food in the future, and I would go back to my hometown immediately. As for taking care of my granddaughter, they should figure out their own way. Immediately afterwards, I contacted my mother-in-law and had a good theory.
After such an uproar, although my daughter-in-law was not very happy, after calming down, she took the initiative to apologize to me, saying that she was ignorant and made me bear more.
As the saying goes, you have to be forgiving and forgiving. We didn't do well in the first place, so it was over if we were considerate of each other.
04
However, what is helpless is that the gourd is pressed, and the scoop is up again. The daughter-in-law stopped screaming, but the little granddaughter actually fought on it.
I don't know what day it started. Every time the granddaughter finishes her homework, she asks for inspection, correction, and signature. For me who graduated from elementary school, this is a big trouble. The signature is okay, you can check and correct mistakes, I really can’t.
Once or twice, that's fine, but the more times I don’t understand, the little granddaughter has emotions.
When I picked her up from school that day, she might have been criticized by the teacher at school. She pouted and didn't speak. When she got home, she yelled at me. said that I don’t understand and don’t know anything. The revised homework is still wrong.
05
At that moment, I couldn't laugh or cry, and it was extremely embarrassing. For some trivial family matters, I can rely on the old to sell the old or be unreasonable, but in the face of children's learning, I can't fool around.
I hurriedly communicated with my son and daughter-in-law, saying that this will not work. I will affect my child's homework, so I should think of a way.
After discussion, they decided to ask a person in charge of the account at the hotel temporarily, and then let the daughter-in-law go home to take the child. In this way, the problem was solved, and I was "liberated".
Written at the end:
In family life, it is usually trivial things. Especially between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, since there is no blood relationship, the psychological distance is relatively large. When encountering problems, it is easy to speak and do things impulsively.
Of course, there are problems to be solved. Entering a family is a family. When the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have a conflict, they all think that they are right and reasonable. But between relatives, it is not enough to just be reasonable. We also need to be humble and tolerant, and we should not put too much emphasis on right and wrong.
However, for some principled issues, it is necessary for the family to maintain a unified opinion. For example, the children’s education in the article must be truthful. If it is wrong, it should be corrected in time, and if it is inappropriate, it should be adjusted in time. It can't take the face into consideration and stick to it in a confused manner, which affects the child's academic work.
So, when deals with family affairs, sometimes it has to be so-so and get along; sometimes it is necessary to work together and take it seriously.
Posting words:
Thank you for your reading and support, and I wish you health and happiness!
Author: Yili Lun, a cheerful and joking emotional narrator, willing to accompany teachers and friends to taste life and laugh about life.
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