The old man has a monthly pension of 6000, and his son pays 20,000 when he is hospitalized. Daughter-in-law: Where did the pension go?

Introduction:

It is said that ten years of watching mother-in-law, ten years of watching daughter-in-law, this sentence is simply an exchange of benefits. A girl who has been married to a man's house all the way back is uncomfortable with the new life. She has to have children and serve her in-laws. Her heart will feel very uneasy about all the unfamiliar things.

It happens that most of the mother-in-laws are around 50 years old at this time. They are in good health and have just retired. Their life is very leisurely. If the mother-in-law can care more about the daughter-in-law at this time, it will undoubtedly be a kindness to the daughter-in-law. Naturally, when her mother-in-law is too old to walk, she will be more filial to her.

There is no love for no reason, and no hate for no reason. If you want someone to be sincere to yourself, you must first give the other party some "benefits". How did the mother-in-law treat her daughter-in-law ten years ago? All feedback will be given, and this is the truth in exchange of sincerity. A good relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually established in the exchange of interests between you and me.

If in a family, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are too close to each other, and even always treat each other as outsiders. They are reluctant to lend a helping hand when they are most difficult. They clearly have the financial strength, but If you have to die without saving, the result is that your son and daughter-in-law are resentful.

is obviously a family, but he treats his son and daughter-in-law as a thief. The mother-in-law has to hold the money in her own hands to be at ease. Is such a mother-in-law right or wrong?

35-year-old Ms. Liu’s narrative:

My surname is Liu. I am 35 years old this year and live in Zhengzhou, Henan. My husband and I have been married for more than ten years and have one child and one daughter. The oldest son is 8 years old.The little girl is 5 years old, has two lovely children, plus a husband who loves me, this kind of life is exactly what every woman expects.

My mother-in-law now lives in her hometown in the town, and my father-in-law passed away more than ten years ago.

Being widowed in old age is a particularly sad thing, but my mother-in-law is very strong, and she can’t see that she is a little vulnerable. Maybe it’s because she was a teacher when she was young, so she has a calm personality. Seriously, I am always calm and unhurried in times of trouble, and the temperament of keeping away from strangers makes my daughter-in-law a little oppressive.

Although my mother-in-law is always more serious, when my husband and I got married, she still took out most of her savings and gave us the down payment for the house, and the money for the wedding and the banquet was also the mother-in-law. After all this was done, the mother-in-law said: "My task is considered complete. From now on, your own affairs will be your own masters. I will not interfere with your affairs anymore. I will go back to live in the town. Live a good life."

From then on, the mother-in-law returned to the town and lived alone.

At first, I thought that my mother-in-law was afraid of conflicts with me, so she deliberately kept her distance from me. She also understood the truth about the smell of distance and smell, secretly stealing liking to mother-in-law was a matter of fact, I didn't want to be with me. Mother-in-law gets along for a long time, I'm afraid that we can't handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Now we live in two places, life is unfettered, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can be more harmonious.

But after a long time, I changed my original view of my mother-in-law, because I felt that my mother-in-law was not keeping a distance from me at all, she was completely indifferent, and she didn't even consider us as a family at all.

Ordinary people will call to say a few words of condolences during the holidays.But my mother-in-law is different. She never takes the initiative to call us, nor does she take the initiative to come to visit. Every Chinese New Year, my husband and I take the initiative to go home to visit. The most sad thing is that I have two children. At that time, my mother-in-law never offered to come over to help. Her attitude was very clear. If you open your mouth, I will come over to help. If you don't open your mouth, I will pretend to be stupid.

Fortunately, my mother was in the city, and she just retired and had time to take care of me, so I did not ask my mother-in-law to come and help me with the children. My mother helped bring both of my children. At that time, I couldn’t go to work because I had just given birth to the children. All the expenses of the family fell on my husband. My life was very difficult, and my mother also subsidized a lot of money. In contrast, I feel that my mother-in-law is an indifferent and ruthless person. Even if she doesn't care about adults, she should at least visit his two grandchildren, but she pretends not to know and has never seen it once.

In recent years, as the mother-in-law is getting older and older, various physical problems have gradually emerged.

Because she used to stand for a long time as a teacher, she had some problems with her legs, so she had to undergo a minor operation. The cost of 10,000 yuan was also paid by my husband.

It is natural for children to spend money for their parents, but I always feel uncomfortable.

Because I am the mother of two children now, I can only take care of the children at home full-time. As a mother, I have no income. The living expenses of our family depend on my husband. We work alone and eat four people. I have to pay back mortgages, car loans, and children’s tuition. The economy is very stressful. My mother-in-law has more than 6,000 yuan in monthly retirement pension. She can't spend it all by herself. Why is it not? Should we pay this money?

The small days are very cool, and she usually sees her circle of friends not go to where travels, or eat and drink there. It is because of the old age and poor health that she is safe and stable. Staying at home, if she was put in before, she could not decide where to go, and now she was sick and hospitalized, and she remembered that she still had a son.

And although her mother-in-law likes to travel in the mountains and water, she is still an elderly person in the final analysis, very economical. I think the mother-in-law must have savings, but she is not willing to take it out, and she also knows the economic conditions of our family. Knowing that I don't have a job now, she just doesn't think so, and doesn't give us any consideration.

I originally thought my mother-in-law had this minor operation. Although it was unhappy, it turned over. But I didn’t expect that after more than half a month, the mother-in-law fell ill again. This time it was a heart problem. After a doctor’s diagnosis, I needed another operation. I was hospitalized for more than half a month. This time I spent more than 20,000 yuan. My mother-in-law still asked my husband to pay. At this time, I was not happy, 20,000 yuan Our family does have it, but for the moment, 20,000 yuan is not a small amount. This includes the children’s tuition and our daily expenses. We have to pay insurance and repay the mortgage. This time I’m true. Can't help but resist.

I complained to my husband: "Your mother is also true. She clearly has such a high pension, so she has to let us take the money. Where did she spend so much money?"

But I didn’t expect that my husband was also standing with her mother-in-law, and her husband thought he was the only child. Even if the mother-in-law is so stingy now, all the property of the mother-in-law will belong to him in a hundred years, so there is no need to calculate it so clearly with her mother-in-law. But I feel unbalanced in my heart. I think of my mother, who has contributed money and effort for our family. But my mother-in-law now clearly has financial strength, but she doesn't help us, and she wants us to post money back. This is simply too irresponsible. .

I really think my mother-in-law is too selfish.Since she retired, my husband and I have never asked her for money. In the past ten years, my mother-in-law said that she had also saved hundreds of thousands of deposits, saying that money is a thing that brings life and death. She What is the effect of staying in your hands now? It's better to lend a helping hand when her son is in trouble, we can still remember her well.

Although we were unhappy with the mother-in-law a hundred, but in the end we still gave out 20,000 yuan, but there is a knot in my heart. I want to ask everyone, in this situation, how should I Shouldn't she take the initiative to tell her mother-in-law to pay for it? Is it really that I am too careful?

Conclusion:

They all said that if you want to have a good daughter-in-law, first the mother-in-law must set an example, just like when parents educate their children, first the elders must be reasonable and the children educated will be filial Sensible, this matter should always be from top to bottom, the elders pay first, and the younger generations will give back.

The same is true for the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. When the daughter-in-law is in trouble, if the mother-in-law can help, then the mother-in-law will have a good daughter-in-law to accompany him in her old age. After giving, she will naturally give back. This is equivalent to an exchange of benefits. , The process of exchanging sincerity for sincerity.

For the elderly, perhaps having a deposit on their hands is their most important psychological sustenance. They feel that the money is still in their hands. They feel most assured. Since the elderly have such a mentality, the young people do not have to correct it. They are all over half a hundred years old, and the remaining days are one day or one less day. Let them live as they please. Don't think about controlling their lives. Just let them be happy. Older people are like children. Be more tolerant and broad-minded. In short, understanding and respect are the most basic for the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get along well. Only with understanding and tolerance can the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law coexist harmoniously.

.