Seven topics to communicate with your adolescent son
Reed
Yang **:
This is the first time I write to you. It shows that I really haven't done enough. I would like to discuss the following aspects with you.
1. About love
Every parent loves his or her children unconditionally. Although we have said the words "How did we give birth to a child like you", this does not mean that our love for you will be lacking or discounted. It is indeed our fault to say such things, and we should apologize to you. But you must not think that your parents' love is reserved because you have not done well enough in some aspects because you have not done it wholeheartedly.
In fact, I say such words out of anger and helplessness on the one hand, and on the other hand out of "deep love and deep hatred", so I self-righteously hope to use such "vicious" language to stimulate your fighting spirit and let you know how to work hard. Facts have proved that this is wrong and will only have negative effects. We sincerely apologize. Children are the continuation of their parents’ life, love and all emotions. Even if we exchange the best son in the world, we will not agree. In this world, there is only one kind of giving that is given without reservation, without any return, and without any conditions, and that is the love of parents.
2. About controlling emotions
Controlling emotions is a quality that an excellent person must have to achieve great things. The more important the matter, the more critical the moment, the more you need to learn to control your emotions. Even if a war is imminent, a critical moment, a life-or-death situation, and the sky is falling, you must remain calm. Because excitement can make people lose their ability to think rationally, logically, and maintain correct judgment. It's reasonable not to raise your voice.
When you got in the car to go to school that day, I was the first to lose my cool. I should apologize. Should be improved. I'm not angry just because you broke your glasses and wasted your money. Rather, he was angry based on all kinds of accumulated emotions that he could not hold back. We encourage each other: we must learn to control our emotions. We must have the courage to Taishan and not change our attitude; we must have the determination to face major events without being confused.
3. About time
Keeping time is an essential quality for a person. Details determine success or failure, and keeping time is one of the most common details. Time is yours and others'. Opportunities always come to those who are prepared. Keeping time is also a form of preparation. A person who arrives early will gain peace of mind, while a person who arrives late will always be in a panic. Whether you keep time or not is the first impression you leave on others, and the best and worst impressions may start from here.
There is a lot of time in a person's life, but life is also very short. As small as one day, one hour, one class, one minute, as large as a lifetime, at all stages of old, middle and young, one year, one semester, one month, how time is allocated and when to do things actually determine a person's success or failure to a large extent. What is reflected in the allocation of time is actually a person's planning and thinking about life, and is a reflection of a person's strategic thinking ability. Thoughts determine the way out. The idea is right, the direction is right, and the path is right. Otherwise everything is blind.
4. About money and consumption
Money is the material basis of life, but saving is also a virtue. As long as it is necessary and within our capabilities, we will do our best to ensure it. What should be spent, even if it is beyond our ability, we will try our best to protect it even if we try our best.
We tell you to save. First, it is a kind of moral character. Second, more importantly, we are worried that you will lose your way and lose the motivation to work hard because of the pursuit of material and money. Losing one's mind by playing with things. We are not sad about the money you spent, but we are worried that you will spend too much money and lose the spirit of struggle.
Let me be more thorough. Because of you, we are more economical. I hope that I can give you the financial protection you deserve when you take exams for college and work. I also hope that I can give you a little help financially in the future when you enter society and start a family. We have also experienced the difficulties of starting from scratch. We have seen that you are working hard and your grades have improved a lot. We are very relieved and full of hope.
5. About friends
We will never stop you from making friends. Good friends are a lifetime treasure. But when making friends, you must make friends with positive energy. We also took many of your friends to swim in the car and took them to eat with you. For example, Chen **, we also encourage you to make friends with him. Although he also has shortcomings.
Although some of your meetings with certain friends that I don’t want you to associate with are passive, if you really find that he does have negative energy, you should actively avoid them.
Of course, we should not equate making friends with snobbery. However, you should never make a friend with negative energy. This will unknowingly instill in us some thoughts and behaviors that seem right but are wrong, and we will still think that we are right and insist on our own opinions.
6. About learning and performance
Learning is lifelong, it will make people understand many truths, and walking in this world is not in vain. College entrance examination and university are important passes for people to enter society. It is also a bridge for a person to acquire knowledge and achieve success.
We are the same as most parents: we hope that you study hard so that you can live a happy life in the future, contribute to society, and not be forced by life and lose the minimum dignity you deserve.
The difference between us and some parents is that some parents may hope that their children will be outstanding and bring themselves vanity and glory; some parents may also hope that their children will be successful in the future and repay their parents. We have no such idea. I simply hope that you can live a stable life and support yourself.
7. Regarding love
I have already communicated this with you before, so there is no need to repeat it. The so-called puppy love actually means that a person is not ready mentally and physically, and does not have the conditions and abilities to fall in love. We will support you if you are suitable for a relationship - including funding. All in all, in the future, study and work are the most important. After that, we have nothing to worry about. Just be happy.
has seen your great progress. Like you, we feel that the dawn is ahead and we are full of confidence.
wishes you success! Have fun!
Your Father Luwei
＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊day
About the author: Lu Wei, formerly known as Yang Limin, is a member of the Chinese Writers Association and a student of the Lu Xun Academy of Literature. He has won the 11th National Minority Literature Creation Horse Award, the 6th and 7th Chongqing Literature Awards, etc. He is the author of a collection of essays "The Dew is Huge" and a collection of poems "Roaring Flowers" and "Heavy Rain Like a Waterfall". So far, more than one million words of various works have been published in newspapers and periodicals at home and abroad, such as "People's Literature", "Essays", "Xinhua Digest", "Poetry Magazine", "People's Daily" and "Reader". This article won the first prize in this essay competition.
Editor: Luo Yuxin
Editor: Chen Taiyong
Reviewer: Feng Fei
